Wednesday 19 January 2005

Back to it!

OK I am back on it!

I don't want to be this size anymore! I don't want to fret that I haven't lost enough... as long as I know I did really well with the food and exercise then that should be that. I suppose I just wanted a boost for all the hard work I DID put in... I tell people how much I kept to it and you can hear sometimes in their tone that yeah right... you cheated and you don't want to tell us... it says it in the amount you lost... NO WAY I didn't cheat and that is why I was sooo angry...
I have been reading some diaries and have got myself up and going again. I must admit I would rather read some of them because they are or have been my size or more... because I feel like I connect with them more in some strange way and I want to be like them if they have managed to loose a lot.

I know we are supposed to take one day at a time but I suppose that is why I have failed so many times before... because I am impatient... I am impatient with almost anything in my life and I have to learn patience...yep... easier said than done.

I can't even concentrate at work at the moment either... I just want to read diaries and talk to friends about it... so I have to try and balance my life and get back on things. I really like my job but if I am not careful I will not have a happy job at all.

Going home tonight to read the Wild Succulent Woman by SARK tonight to get some inspiration.

See ya... Chubby Mum

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