Wednesday, 1 June 2005

My weigh in

Feeling a bit better today.

Sorry about my outburst yesterday. I just felt like there was never going to be a job out there that I love as much as this one. In my other jobs yeah they were well paid and full time and the jobs were ok but the bosses sucked!! They were backstabbing bitches or asshole men that loved power and I hated going to work.

But with this job I don't wake up in the morning and think OH NO I have to go to work and I don't take sick days unless I REALLY have to!!! I love my boss she is straight to the point!! It just feels in the last 15 years with my Dad with Cancer and my grandparents dying within 5 months of each other and me with the cancer scare and my dad dying when life was finally getting better! Three of my friends moving miles away... that everything has been on top of me and this last year has been normal and just being able to get on with life and not fear. I hate the fear this redundancy scare has put me in!!!

I know after thinking about it that I have no choice as to what is happening but it is a worry!
I know that others have been through this and I have been through it twice. I just want to plod along in life!!! that is all I want to do! The money so that I can do things with my kids and my hubby is all I want!

BLONDE broke up with her boyfriend (for the third time) today. He managed to email me first and I just don't know what to say but THANK GOD because she doesn't deserve him. Now that she got him to pay over nine hundred dollars in bills that were overdue she goes and gets rid of him OMG (she doesn't know that I know this) and then after all that phones me but as usual doesn't even bother to ask how I am going NEVER NOT once has she asked! It is all about her. I said I had to go because someone was at my door (which was true) but said I would phone back. I didn't only because my life is all I can handle at the moment I don't need to work out hers as well! I don't want to work out hers as well!

Well after all that I went to my Weight Watchers meeting andI LOST!! I LOST!!!! I LOST and didn't know if I would. I went for 2 little walks (20 minutes worth) I lost 1.9 kilos this week and didn't even try… It was weird.

My husband hugged me so tight tonight and said he was proud of me. Don't take that the wrong way. He loves me the way I am but is proud that I am sticking with this. I love him so much I don't think I would have come to this without his support and encouragement in the last couple of weeks we have just been doing this lifestyle change and not thinking about it and it has been good. I sometimes think that doing heaps and heaps of exercise is not getting me to where I want. I know it is good for me and I am going to do some walking but the other stuff like the gym might have to wait for a while. As long as I am eating healthier then that is all that matters to me at the moment.

P.S thank you for all the wonderful comments on my tag board! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!! You don’t how much it means to me.


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