Sunday, 19 June 2005

Thanks! Want to keep it off

Not much to tell today. I had a baddd night sleep still trying to work out what I want and after the meeting last night where they offered money and more money off the creche fees and then talking and talking and talking to my hubby he said... this year they are going through redundancy and what happens next year when they don't get the student numbers again are we going to go through redundancy again?

I showed hubby wrote I wrote in here last night and he said that I haven't told all of my feelings and the fact that I am a worry wart and if I had to go from now till after August worrying whether I have a job or not and in August/September we have the boys birthdays and then Christmas after that. I have had my oldest and now my youngest in there for 5 years and I have felt comfortable that they are there and they have purposely built this new building for the creche and it is fantastic and the staff turnover hasn't been that bad and then when they leave to say go overseas they come back so when you look at it like that you start to realise there must be something there that they come back to...

I do like the ladies that own the business and I do get along with all the teachers and I do think I could do the job.

The other thing I didn't mention is that I like my job but it isn't challenging and that I do have a GREAT boss but really is it right staying just because of my old boss?

I don't know I am torn but I suppose any new challenge and people will be torn.

I am going to talk to my existing boss on Monday and tell her what I am thinking and say I will take voluntary redundancy that way the ladies that have been there 30 years and 15 years won't have to fret either I mean they are all over 50 and fretting on how they are going to find another job. I don't want them to go through that. One lady has a son who is disabled and hubby is at home looking after him and she works and the other lady her hubby just went through a major heart surgery and then had a mild heart attack a couple of weeks ago.

I know that I shouldn't be thinking of them when I decide and I haven't decided 100% but the challenge is definatly something that I need. I have got my job so under control that I think in a way I am sooooo comfortable and I am even doing my bosses job because she is overloaded and says go through her desk and take anything I can do..... She also said the other day that whenever I am away she always knows that she can find everything because I am so thorough. When I thought back on that it makes me sound anal but I think it is because I am bored! Not unhappy with my work but bored and so then when I am bored I tend to organise.

Took my boy to his soccer game today POURING down with rain and they were slaughtered.... the kids there looked so much older and our team seemed to be defending the whole time and couldn't get to the goal at all. But they learnt something today that they have to go for the ball and not just sit back and wait for it to come to them.

We just had a lovely roast and it was delicious... usually that is a Sunday dinner but with the weather it just looked the sort of day to have it yummmmmmmy.

The other thing is is if I take this job offer then I can go to the gym on Monday and Tuesday in the morning with my friends and then during the night and can afford it... maybe can afford it. If I have to get another car then that might be hard but I don't want to worry whether next month or in the next two months that I won't have a job it just feels like I am putting my life on hold.

OMG I am talking about this job soooo much but I can't get it out of my mind.

Tomorrow I am going to do some more walking!!! have been slack in the last couple of days but with this cold I am not worrying too much. I have come to the conclusion that 500 grams a week is all I want to loose because they say the slower you take it off the long you keep it off AND BOY I WANT TO KEEP IT OFF.

Good Night


P.S THANK you EVERYONE for the comments!! You are the best and you make me happy to have you as friends!! And I do value your comments and your help.

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