I just feel like I have been eating and eating today... I hate having my monthly and feeling like this... I REALLY do.
Went to work today and as I only work 20 hours a week (and that suits my situation with the kids at the moment) my boss has asked if I want to do extra work. I said I couldn't because I can't work anymore hours due to the fact I pick up my son from school etc. She said she has been asked if I would do some work for the Researchers etc and I can do the work from home Woohooooo that sounds good to me.. as I really need the money etc (smile).
So that was a start to the day at work then when I got home CSon had to go to his first Soccer practice and has been bugging me for days leading up to it as he really wants to learn Soccer. He was soooo cute in his socks and shin pads and soccer boots and shorts... I was sooo proud of my little man running on the field kicking the ball. I am a Soccer mum he he he he now I want to look like one (smile).
Went to the gym last night for a program to be done for me. I was sooo nervous you wouldn't believe. The guy was a chinese guy and sooo nice. I felt comfortable with him and told him about my knee and how it had been giving me trouble lately. Especially when I was on the bike.
So he went through all the machines and we decided that I am not allowed on the Elipitical or the bikes but I am allowed on the Treadmill just until I strengthen my thigh muscles. He seems to think that with all the walking and kickboxing that I have been favouring my left leg and my muscles aren't strong enough in that leg. So we did some exercises on the swiss ball and the Fit Strip or elastic band things to strengthen the thigh muscle and did dumb bells for the legs. It is the first time (I have had 3 from other gyms grrr)that I have felt that someone has listened about my knee.
Ok they were all polite and didn't say that "Ok Lady since you are a big person obviously your knee is going to give you trouble" yesssss I know this but still doesn't help the fact that the bloody knee is sore when I do things like going up stairs and using my knee to get me up that I have to do something about it or I will give up on exercising altogether because it hurts so much... so there is a light at the end of the tunnel Woohooo.
Anyway that is enough blabbing for me. Full on weekend this weekend so I might not have time to update till Monday but YOU NEVER KNOW he he
ChubbyMum
Friday, 29 April 2005
Down in the Dumps
Hey Diary
I haven't been in a talkative mood (or writing mood) this week. I am not too sure what it is.. maybe it is because I got my monthly Wednesday morning, which would explain the weigh in this week of staying the same ho hum. I am glad that I didn't gain or and stayed the same but I did soooo much exercise (but didn't track) and so I am bringing it down to the fact that I have my monthly.
I just feel like I can't get off the 8.8 kilos lost!!! I mean what is wrong with me!! I have been doing so much walking and gym that now I have stuffed up my knee and it is really killing me.
So yep little depressed and not feeling right this week. I have to say I have been reading everyones journals but haven't replied (sorry)...
Leenie girl I am sorry about what you are going through and you amaze me with the way you are just going with the flow (inspirational I can tell you).
Janine ... all I can say is YOU GO GIRL, I am so glad you are back on track hun and hopefully I will get out of this rut to do it with ya.
Karen soooooo soooo jealous of your holiday my friend but you deserve it after all the crap going on at your work...
Fit-Nit OH MY GOD girl update!!!! he he he he.
Janene all I can say is ALMOST MAY woohooo for you.
Jo girl I can totally understand the frustration over doing so well and not having the loss you deserve, but babe it will turn up tomorrow aye!
Margaret OMG your bosses girl they are too funny!
Missy How are you girl!!! Loveeee the lesson in favors for your children..WELL done! P.S still can't get to your recent entry unless I click on archives then the recent date.
OMG there are sooo many more that I have read in my list below but haven't replied... SOORRYYY but I am back on track this week girls!!
I am going to have a program made up for me today with the Uni Gym so that is going to be interesting especially with my knee... I am a little worried about it. TGirl thinks it could be the bike and so does hubby because I only started having problems with my knee again when I got back on the bike... so we shall see huh.
Ok better get upstairs to work (doing this in the labs he he he or I get disturbed when I am in my office).
Love ya all and sorry for not updating like I have been.
P.S Happy-p can you email me with your diary? I am sure you have before but for some reason I can't find it... I would love to read about you.
Byeeee ChubbyMum
OMG I am in a grump... I am angry at myself for not getting to this 10 kilos... I just want to keep loosing and it feels like it is taking so long... I know I know it took a long time to put it on I can't expect it to take 5 minutes to get it off.. but hey I am working out 4 hours a week and nothing is happening!!!! Just soooo f*(&(*&(*&n angry... and I don't want to be.
I haven't been in a talkative mood (or writing mood) this week. I am not too sure what it is.. maybe it is because I got my monthly Wednesday morning, which would explain the weigh in this week of staying the same ho hum. I am glad that I didn't gain or and stayed the same but I did soooo much exercise (but didn't track) and so I am bringing it down to the fact that I have my monthly.
I just feel like I can't get off the 8.8 kilos lost!!! I mean what is wrong with me!! I have been doing so much walking and gym that now I have stuffed up my knee and it is really killing me.
So yep little depressed and not feeling right this week. I have to say I have been reading everyones journals but haven't replied (sorry)...
Leenie girl I am sorry about what you are going through and you amaze me with the way you are just going with the flow (inspirational I can tell you).
Janine ... all I can say is YOU GO GIRL, I am so glad you are back on track hun and hopefully I will get out of this rut to do it with ya.
Karen soooooo soooo jealous of your holiday my friend but you deserve it after all the crap going on at your work...
Fit-Nit OH MY GOD girl update!!!! he he he he.
Janene all I can say is ALMOST MAY woohooo for you.
Jo girl I can totally understand the frustration over doing so well and not having the loss you deserve, but babe it will turn up tomorrow aye!
Margaret OMG your bosses girl they are too funny!
Missy How are you girl!!! Loveeee the lesson in favors for your children..WELL done! P.S still can't get to your recent entry unless I click on archives then the recent date.
OMG there are sooo many more that I have read in my list below but haven't replied... SOORRYYY but I am back on track this week girls!!
I am going to have a program made up for me today with the Uni Gym so that is going to be interesting especially with my knee... I am a little worried about it. TGirl thinks it could be the bike and so does hubby because I only started having problems with my knee again when I got back on the bike... so we shall see huh.
Ok better get upstairs to work (doing this in the labs he he he or I get disturbed when I am in my office).
Love ya all and sorry for not updating like I have been.
P.S Happy-p can you email me with your diary? I am sure you have before but for some reason I can't find it... I would love to read about you.
Byeeee ChubbyMum
OMG I am in a grump... I am angry at myself for not getting to this 10 kilos... I just want to keep loosing and it feels like it is taking so long... I know I know it took a long time to put it on I can't expect it to take 5 minutes to get it off.. but hey I am working out 4 hours a week and nothing is happening!!!! Just soooo f*(&(*&(*&n angry... and I don't want to be.
Wednesday, 27 April 2005
Full on Anzac weekend
OMG in the last couple of weeks I have been slack haven't I... OMG OMG I just haven't felt like being on the computer when I get home at night time and just feel like doing my cross stitch... and snuggling on the couch.
Well let's see.. I have had so many people email me to say what happened to you over the last couple of days sooo let's see... what did I do hmmm
Saturday:Slept in till about 8.30 OMG I couldn't believe it as usually the kids are awak at like 6.30 he he he and that was nice. Went out grocery shopping with the kids and my mum and that was a mission I can tell you. After lunch decided to go for a walk so asked oldest son (think might call him CSon and youngest son Qson) So asked CSon if he wanted to go for a walk to TGirl's with me and he did... so we set off for our walk 3.3k's later we were there but my knee was killing me... don't know what I have done with it but it isn't good. Had a great time at TGirl's except for CSon... hmmm not going into it here but I just wanted to strangle him. The reason I take him with me is USUALLY I know I can trust him to not get in trouble but I was soooo angry by the time we got home it was not funny. But had fun at TGirls and it felt relaxing. So that was my exercise done... I wanted to just sit and do my xstitch all day but felt that if I didn't get off my backside and do some exercise then I would feel quilty and not enjoy my blobbing time. So needless to say I did my xstitching Saturday night he he he he.
Sunday:Slept till 8am then the kids decided they wanted to get into bed with us and watch cartoons... which was great so we did that then put them in the bath while we tackled the wardrobe he he he... OMG I was in fits of laughter though because CSon didn't want to wash his hair and when his Dad tried to wash his hair and wouldn't let him I said "Put him in head first, put him in head first"laughing my head off because he was not happy and decided while his Dad was turning around to get the shampooo he would get out of the bath and run down the stairs and hide he he he he I was laughing so hard that I thought I was going to wet my pants... especially when his Dad ran down the stairs and was trying to find him... it was sooooo funnnnyyyy but I guess you had to be there... the poor little man must have been sooo cold he he he he.
Got rid of so many clothes that were old and I just wouldn't wear again... but then hubby threw a pair of jeans at me and said try on... now I haven't worn these jeans in like 5 years as I have been too scared to try them on but they fit..OMG they fit but just... wouldn't like to sit down in them he he he but something for me to strive for. Was in my PJ's and totally enjoying it since outside was sooo cold, and friends called to say they would be over in half an hour OMG panic... I looked a fright so got a shower and dressed and felt much better.
Went out to BLONDE's for dinner and it was suprisingly good.. I was a little worried that I would be bored out of my tree but the company was good and her new boyfriend is quite nice and she looked really relaxed with him... so we shall see.
MondayNeedless to say we snuggled in the bed in the morning again OMG it was sooo great to do that this weekend... but then went to the Lake and walked around (the whole family... woohooo) the boys were on their bikes and we were walking and it felt great to do a family thing... I was just sooo happy with that. I did it at my pace though because of my knee and have decided that I am going to do that from now on as if I try to go fast like everyone else then it is only ruining my knee even more and it isn't worth it because any exercise is better than none at all that is for sure. It felt great to do family things on this day and I felt so exhilirated...
So that is me really... it wasn't that exciting but it was a full on weekend and spending time with the family instead of my computer and I enjoyed it...
Anyway... glad some of ya missed me...
ChubbyMum
Well let's see.. I have had so many people email me to say what happened to you over the last couple of days sooo let's see... what did I do hmmm
Saturday:Slept in till about 8.30 OMG I couldn't believe it as usually the kids are awak at like 6.30 he he he and that was nice. Went out grocery shopping with the kids and my mum and that was a mission I can tell you. After lunch decided to go for a walk so asked oldest son (think might call him CSon and youngest son Qson) So asked CSon if he wanted to go for a walk to TGirl's with me and he did... so we set off for our walk 3.3k's later we were there but my knee was killing me... don't know what I have done with it but it isn't good. Had a great time at TGirl's except for CSon... hmmm not going into it here but I just wanted to strangle him. The reason I take him with me is USUALLY I know I can trust him to not get in trouble but I was soooo angry by the time we got home it was not funny. But had fun at TGirls and it felt relaxing. So that was my exercise done... I wanted to just sit and do my xstitch all day but felt that if I didn't get off my backside and do some exercise then I would feel quilty and not enjoy my blobbing time. So needless to say I did my xstitching Saturday night he he he he.
Sunday:Slept till 8am then the kids decided they wanted to get into bed with us and watch cartoons... which was great so we did that then put them in the bath while we tackled the wardrobe he he he... OMG I was in fits of laughter though because CSon didn't want to wash his hair and when his Dad tried to wash his hair and wouldn't let him I said "Put him in head first, put him in head first"laughing my head off because he was not happy and decided while his Dad was turning around to get the shampooo he would get out of the bath and run down the stairs and hide he he he he I was laughing so hard that I thought I was going to wet my pants... especially when his Dad ran down the stairs and was trying to find him... it was sooooo funnnnyyyy but I guess you had to be there... the poor little man must have been sooo cold he he he he.
Got rid of so many clothes that were old and I just wouldn't wear again... but then hubby threw a pair of jeans at me and said try on... now I haven't worn these jeans in like 5 years as I have been too scared to try them on but they fit..OMG they fit but just... wouldn't like to sit down in them he he he but something for me to strive for. Was in my PJ's and totally enjoying it since outside was sooo cold, and friends called to say they would be over in half an hour OMG panic... I looked a fright so got a shower and dressed and felt much better.
Went out to BLONDE's for dinner and it was suprisingly good.. I was a little worried that I would be bored out of my tree but the company was good and her new boyfriend is quite nice and she looked really relaxed with him... so we shall see.
MondayNeedless to say we snuggled in the bed in the morning again OMG it was sooo great to do that this weekend... but then went to the Lake and walked around (the whole family... woohooo) the boys were on their bikes and we were walking and it felt great to do a family thing... I was just sooo happy with that. I did it at my pace though because of my knee and have decided that I am going to do that from now on as if I try to go fast like everyone else then it is only ruining my knee even more and it isn't worth it because any exercise is better than none at all that is for sure. It felt great to do family things on this day and I felt so exhilirated...
So that is me really... it wasn't that exciting but it was a full on weekend and spending time with the family instead of my computer and I enjoyed it...
Anyway... glad some of ya missed me...
ChubbyMum
Saturday, 23 April 2005
I am being really bad with my updates lately {smack hand}
Yesterday was such a full on day and the weather SUCKED but it was nice to have long sleeves on and feel nice and comfy warm at home.
Work was soooo slow and wanted it to hurry up. I do like my job but I think there is no challenge to it now that I am getting bored out of my tree… but then it suits me the hours etc and I do like the people I work with.
Went to kick boxing last night but lasted only half an hour because my knee was killing me with the kicks. I don’t know what the problem was with the knee but hey…… so told BLONDE that I was going to the bikes and treadmill and she said she would join me. So that was ok.
Did 15 minutes on the bikes and it wasn’t helping the knee at all so decided to go on the treadmill and last half an hour. I managed to do 2 kilometres on the treadmill so that was great…. The bloody thing kept wanting to take my speed down when I tried to find out my heart beat… yeah I know it is only going by the norm and mine wasn’t the norm but if it took it down anymore then I would be standing still he he he he he he.
I was sweating like a pig it was fantastic. I know that most of ya wouldn’t think that sweat coming down off your neck and your eyes and your hair feeling all moist isn’t fantastic but it was… last time I tried the weight loss thing I went to the gym and no sweat was coming off me and now it is I just want my shirt to get wet he he he and maybe it would feel like I am doing a really good work out.. I look at some of the others and how wet they are and I think one day I am going to be fit enough for it to show like that he he he he he.
So after that went home for a fantastic dinner or lemon chicken kantong… OMG FANTASTIC and low in points too.
After BLONDE finally left I went to TGirl’s house it was great… we went through her cross stitch box and OMG she has so many UFO’s it is funny (Unfinished Objects he he he) I couldn’t stop laughing as she kept bringing more out and more out that were beautiful and half finished he he he, it was nice and relaxed and we also managed to watch wife swapping on television now that is an interesting show… I mean it is only for a week and some of these kids and parents think it is a lifetime… a week and you get $50,000 isn’t really a bad deal aye.
After that I fell in bed and didn’t want to get up this morning….. I just had the urge to stay at home in bed with all the warm blankets and snuggle hmmmm no can do had to go to work ho hum.!!!
Was ok with food… not naughty but didn’t drink as much water as I should be…. Exercise done… and need to do some more in the weekend but think I am on track.. wouldn’t mind loosing a nice little figure this week… but unfortunalty my monthly was supposed to happen on Tuesday and it hasn’t…. not to worried as I know I won’t be pregnant he he he he but don’t want it to be here on Tuesday or I will be so angry as it won’t show a good result and I want to loose at least 500grams a week!!! That is my goal!!! And that isn’t too hard to achieve!
Anyway gotta go
ChubbyMum
Yesterday was such a full on day and the weather SUCKED but it was nice to have long sleeves on and feel nice and comfy warm at home.
Work was soooo slow and wanted it to hurry up. I do like my job but I think there is no challenge to it now that I am getting bored out of my tree… but then it suits me the hours etc and I do like the people I work with.
Went to kick boxing last night but lasted only half an hour because my knee was killing me with the kicks. I don’t know what the problem was with the knee but hey…… so told BLONDE that I was going to the bikes and treadmill and she said she would join me. So that was ok.
Did 15 minutes on the bikes and it wasn’t helping the knee at all so decided to go on the treadmill and last half an hour. I managed to do 2 kilometres on the treadmill so that was great…. The bloody thing kept wanting to take my speed down when I tried to find out my heart beat… yeah I know it is only going by the norm and mine wasn’t the norm but if it took it down anymore then I would be standing still he he he he he he.
I was sweating like a pig it was fantastic. I know that most of ya wouldn’t think that sweat coming down off your neck and your eyes and your hair feeling all moist isn’t fantastic but it was… last time I tried the weight loss thing I went to the gym and no sweat was coming off me and now it is I just want my shirt to get wet he he he and maybe it would feel like I am doing a really good work out.. I look at some of the others and how wet they are and I think one day I am going to be fit enough for it to show like that he he he he he.
So after that went home for a fantastic dinner or lemon chicken kantong… OMG FANTASTIC and low in points too.
After BLONDE finally left I went to TGirl’s house it was great… we went through her cross stitch box and OMG she has so many UFO’s it is funny (Unfinished Objects he he he) I couldn’t stop laughing as she kept bringing more out and more out that were beautiful and half finished he he he, it was nice and relaxed and we also managed to watch wife swapping on television now that is an interesting show… I mean it is only for a week and some of these kids and parents think it is a lifetime… a week and you get $50,000 isn’t really a bad deal aye.
After that I fell in bed and didn’t want to get up this morning….. I just had the urge to stay at home in bed with all the warm blankets and snuggle hmmmm no can do had to go to work ho hum.!!!
Was ok with food… not naughty but didn’t drink as much water as I should be…. Exercise done… and need to do some more in the weekend but think I am on track.. wouldn’t mind loosing a nice little figure this week… but unfortunalty my monthly was supposed to happen on Tuesday and it hasn’t…. not to worried as I know I won’t be pregnant he he he he but don’t want it to be here on Tuesday or I will be so angry as it won’t show a good result and I want to loose at least 500grams a week!!! That is my goal!!! And that isn’t too hard to achieve!
Anyway gotta go
ChubbyMum
Thursday, 21 April 2005
Weigh in not so bad
Didn't post last night as I was just so tired!!! But anyway went in for my weigh in last night and was not worried too much and thought that I would gain at least 2 kilo's because down in Wellington I just decided to be and not to worry too much about being strict and have some fun....welllll wellll welllll I lost 500 grams Woohoooooo it is better than a gain that is for sure!!!
I was telling hubby last night I know I have only lost 8.8 but I do feel like the week before I went down to Wellington that I had lost up to 10 kilos as I was feeling good but in the last week I haven't been that good so I do feel like I have lost 10 kilos but now back to 8.8 because of being naughty and in my mind I like that he he he he he... so this week my friends I am going to be good.
I was happy with that result you wouldn't believe... BLONDE gained 800 grams but mind you she has been going out on a lot of dates lately so that is fair enough.
Brought a FitStrip from Weight Watchers last night as I have this fear that my arms are going to be sooo flabby when I loose this weight (when I loose this weight he he he he not if I loose this weight) see Janine I am thinking positively like you keep telling me too... I am trying he he. I tried it last night and OMG OMG my arms are sooo sore this morning.. Yayyyyyy.
Ok girls my aim for this week is to loose my 1.2 kilos to get to this OFFICIAL 10 kilos so onward and downward for me. I have my monthly starting any day soon... think it might be today so maybe if I didn't have that I would have lost a little more last night hmmm? I am always heavier the week before yukkkkkky.
Taking my Oldest son Ten Pin Bowling today and I am sooooo looking forward to it you wouldn't believe. I am actually being more active with them now. Took them both to the park yesterday for 2 hours and they had a ball and went to sleep right on hitting the pillows last night YAYYYYY so today is going to be fun. My oldest got all dressed up this morning ready for going Ten Pin bowling he put on a flowery shirt (you know one of those hawaiian shirts (dark blue)) and nice shorts and it looked rather sexy for a 5 year old he he he he... so excited he is...
Anyway will write more later today.
ChubbyMum
Ok I am back on after going to Ten Pin Bowling with oldest son and OMG we had sooooo much fun. It was his first time and we also took my mother in law and my friend (BLONDE)and we had soooo much fun and laughed and I got 3... yep 3 STRIKES on the 10th round 3 in a row can you believe... nope I couldn't either. I really enjoyed BLONDE's company today and my mother in laws too it was fantastic. Corbin was sooo excited and he was like a kid in a candy store it was really nice to see. He got 2 STRIKES too little monkey. BLONDE's new boyfriend came to visit us at the Ten Pin Bowling and I really do like him and she is so different around him... much nicer to be around and happy. He is like a calming influence on her.I think I am coming down with the flu I am feeling sooo heavy and cheeks feel hot and not feeling good.. YUKKKKYYYYYYYYYY I have had such a good day and don't want to be sick NOPE NOPE NOPE.
Anyway everyone have a great night.. bye bye
I was telling hubby last night I know I have only lost 8.8 but I do feel like the week before I went down to Wellington that I had lost up to 10 kilos as I was feeling good but in the last week I haven't been that good so I do feel like I have lost 10 kilos but now back to 8.8 because of being naughty and in my mind I like that he he he he he... so this week my friends I am going to be good.
I was happy with that result you wouldn't believe... BLONDE gained 800 grams but mind you she has been going out on a lot of dates lately so that is fair enough.
Brought a FitStrip from Weight Watchers last night as I have this fear that my arms are going to be sooo flabby when I loose this weight (when I loose this weight he he he he not if I loose this weight) see Janine I am thinking positively like you keep telling me too... I am trying he he. I tried it last night and OMG OMG my arms are sooo sore this morning.. Yayyyyyy.
Ok girls my aim for this week is to loose my 1.2 kilos to get to this OFFICIAL 10 kilos so onward and downward for me. I have my monthly starting any day soon... think it might be today so maybe if I didn't have that I would have lost a little more last night hmmm? I am always heavier the week before yukkkkkky.
Taking my Oldest son Ten Pin Bowling today and I am sooooo looking forward to it you wouldn't believe. I am actually being more active with them now. Took them both to the park yesterday for 2 hours and they had a ball and went to sleep right on hitting the pillows last night YAYYYYY so today is going to be fun. My oldest got all dressed up this morning ready for going Ten Pin bowling he put on a flowery shirt (you know one of those hawaiian shirts (dark blue)) and nice shorts and it looked rather sexy for a 5 year old he he he he... so excited he is...
Anyway will write more later today.
ChubbyMum
Ok I am back on after going to Ten Pin Bowling with oldest son and OMG we had sooooo much fun. It was his first time and we also took my mother in law and my friend (BLONDE)and we had soooo much fun and laughed and I got 3... yep 3 STRIKES on the 10th round 3 in a row can you believe... nope I couldn't either. I really enjoyed BLONDE's company today and my mother in laws too it was fantastic. Corbin was sooo excited and he was like a kid in a candy store it was really nice to see. He got 2 STRIKES too little monkey. BLONDE's new boyfriend came to visit us at the Ten Pin Bowling and I really do like him and she is so different around him... much nicer to be around and happy. He is like a calming influence on her.I think I am coming down with the flu I am feeling sooo heavy and cheeks feel hot and not feeling good.. YUKKKKYYYYYYYYYY I have had such a good day and don't want to be sick NOPE NOPE NOPE.
Anyway everyone have a great night.. bye bye
Wednesday, 20 April 2005
Met Blonde's Man
Hi guys well I am typing this the day after... so yesterday was an ok day. I went back to work.. Does anyone else hate the first day back after a holiday? I am always afraid of coming back to a nightmare. In my last job my boss used to go through your desk when you were away and it always made me soooo nervous.
I got back and they were all smiley and my boss said she had missed me and how was the break and she had managed to clean her desk OMG if you knew my boss she never has time to do that. She had even cleaned her folders off the meeting desk (now that I have never seen) and she cleaned out all the stuff she didn't need and put it in the confidential shredding bin... so when she said "what do you think" I was flabergasted and clapped and said "you have been a busy wee lass" he he he it was good to see her like that as she is usually a stressed puppy. It was great to have them miss me and come back to smiling faces that is for sure. My desk looks like a nightmare though as there is soooooo much work to be done.
Went to the gym last night, usually do kickboxing on a Monday but every alternate kickboxing there is a teacher called Vanessa and Blonde and I really don't like her that much so we have decided to do the bike and treadmill and weights (arms for me) instead of being with her. Plus with doing some resistance maybe I can tone up these arms as I am scared of the flabby arms when I loose the weight he he he he.
I am really getting in to this again and it feels great. I didn't realise how much only 1 week out of routine it affected me. I was starting to feel sick and lazy and run down again and no energy to even do anything. I don't want that anymore. I want energy and I don't want to mope anymore. It is exilerating (spelling hmmm) to feel alive again. I don't puff when going up the stairs to our bedroom anymore either and I want to do things with the kids and it isn't a chore like it used to be.
Well I just went to morning tea with BLONDE and her new boyfriend... she is worried about whether he is too big or what and if they get along... OMG I could have kicked her backside. I mean I am supposed to be her friend and I am bigger than him! I said to her "What is your problem with weight? I mean you are friends with me... are you ashamed to be with me as well? He isn't big at all (not by the photo she sent) if you connect then that should be what you decide on... because babe he can loose weight and you should go by the soul and how he treats you not by looks"
Yes... I can hear you all saying it does make a difference as you want to be attracted to them but OMG this guy... I met him today with her at morning tea!!!
What a fabulous personality he has... he keeps the conversation going and it is interesting and he just makes people feel comfortable like they have been friends with him for years. He owns his own business and has the most amazing eyes for a guy...
The weird thing was... was that when he turned around to meet me, I took a step back and my eyes almost popped out of my head because he looked like an old boyfriend (that asked me to marry him before my hubby) and I have never ever in my life come across that before! And no it wasn't because he looked like an ex that I like him for her... it was because of him and how nice he was to her and how he looked at her and just the caring nature... I tell you she would be a fool to let him go after how her ex treated her!! A FOOL not to get to know him.... ok re-reading this last paragraph does sound strange but if you met her ex you would know what I mean... he was judgemental and didn't like her gaining weight (not one little bit). When they got pregnant he said he didn't want to have sex with her because she was fat and ugly and he wouldn't go anywhere with her because then everyone would know what they had been doing (HELLOOOOO ?????) She was always doubting herself and was miserable..
Ok... so what a beautiful day it is here today... the sun is shining and it isn't hot either... I can't wait to finish work and get out into it... woohoooo. Taking my oldest son ten pin bowling tomorrow as my youngest is in creche and oldest is on school holidays.. I reakon we are going to have fun.
I have written enough... apart from ARGHHHHHHHH I am weighing in tonight after 2 weeks away... I know it isn't going to be good (even though I don't feel like I have gained) but I know it will be... but hey that is life... back on track this week and get myself down to that 120 kilo mark he he he
BYEEEEE.......
ChubbyMum
I got back and they were all smiley and my boss said she had missed me and how was the break and she had managed to clean her desk OMG if you knew my boss she never has time to do that. She had even cleaned her folders off the meeting desk (now that I have never seen) and she cleaned out all the stuff she didn't need and put it in the confidential shredding bin... so when she said "what do you think" I was flabergasted and clapped and said "you have been a busy wee lass" he he he it was good to see her like that as she is usually a stressed puppy. It was great to have them miss me and come back to smiling faces that is for sure. My desk looks like a nightmare though as there is soooooo much work to be done.
Went to the gym last night, usually do kickboxing on a Monday but every alternate kickboxing there is a teacher called Vanessa and Blonde and I really don't like her that much so we have decided to do the bike and treadmill and weights (arms for me) instead of being with her. Plus with doing some resistance maybe I can tone up these arms as I am scared of the flabby arms when I loose the weight he he he he.
I am really getting in to this again and it feels great. I didn't realise how much only 1 week out of routine it affected me. I was starting to feel sick and lazy and run down again and no energy to even do anything. I don't want that anymore. I want energy and I don't want to mope anymore. It is exilerating (spelling hmmm) to feel alive again. I don't puff when going up the stairs to our bedroom anymore either and I want to do things with the kids and it isn't a chore like it used to be.
Well I just went to morning tea with BLONDE and her new boyfriend... she is worried about whether he is too big or what and if they get along... OMG I could have kicked her backside. I mean I am supposed to be her friend and I am bigger than him! I said to her "What is your problem with weight? I mean you are friends with me... are you ashamed to be with me as well? He isn't big at all (not by the photo she sent) if you connect then that should be what you decide on... because babe he can loose weight and you should go by the soul and how he treats you not by looks"
Yes... I can hear you all saying it does make a difference as you want to be attracted to them but OMG this guy... I met him today with her at morning tea!!!
What a fabulous personality he has... he keeps the conversation going and it is interesting and he just makes people feel comfortable like they have been friends with him for years. He owns his own business and has the most amazing eyes for a guy...
The weird thing was... was that when he turned around to meet me, I took a step back and my eyes almost popped out of my head because he looked like an old boyfriend (that asked me to marry him before my hubby) and I have never ever in my life come across that before! And no it wasn't because he looked like an ex that I like him for her... it was because of him and how nice he was to her and how he looked at her and just the caring nature... I tell you she would be a fool to let him go after how her ex treated her!! A FOOL not to get to know him.... ok re-reading this last paragraph does sound strange but if you met her ex you would know what I mean... he was judgemental and didn't like her gaining weight (not one little bit). When they got pregnant he said he didn't want to have sex with her because she was fat and ugly and he wouldn't go anywhere with her because then everyone would know what they had been doing (HELLOOOOO ?????) She was always doubting herself and was miserable..
Ok... so what a beautiful day it is here today... the sun is shining and it isn't hot either... I can't wait to finish work and get out into it... woohoooo. Taking my oldest son ten pin bowling tomorrow as my youngest is in creche and oldest is on school holidays.. I reakon we are going to have fun.
I have written enough... apart from ARGHHHHHHHH I am weighing in tonight after 2 weeks away... I know it isn't going to be good (even though I don't feel like I have gained) but I know it will be... but hey that is life... back on track this week and get myself down to that 120 kilo mark he he he
BYEEEEE.......
ChubbyMum
Sunday, 17 April 2005
Another goal to be reached
What a bla day today.... I did absolutly nothing but cross stitch today. I think I really overdid it yesterday. Didn't realise that when I was walking I was constantly holding up my back pack that my arms were holding up the backpack that I used my pecs and I couldn't sleep last night as I was soooo sore... it felt like I was having a heart attack until I realised that when I raised my arms that it was the muscles he he he he... so I was punished last night he he.
I am not going to like the next two weeks. My buddy TGirl is not going to be at the meetings or our walks as she is on school holidays with her kids... which is great for her, but I have been so off track this week with the holiday and the fact that I haven't walked with TGirl that I hope I can get motivated again. Yes I did the walk last night but the food has been atrocious this week. I don't want to put this weight back on... just after seeing my friend in Wellington and achieving my goal that she notices the 10 kilos I have lost a little bit of steam. I want to get the 20 kilos off by the end of the year. I want to feel good about myself again and I have been REALLYYYY bad with not counting the points.... so I have to get my A into G and get to it!
What will get me motivated again? I suppose finding another goal to go for but I cannot work out what. I suppose the fact that my brother in law is coming back at the end of September and I haven't seen him for 2 years... maybe I should aim for that? hmmmmm... I think I will make a goal
So this is it!!!! I want to be at 125 kilos by end of September and yes it is going to be hard but it is what I am aiming for... yes TGirl I know don't be harsh on yourself but I am going to be realistic and at least it is something to aim for because I don't achieve if I don't aim and if I don't get it I don't get it. Just tired of being big. I want to go and buy some nice shoes and some nice clothes and feel sexy again.
Anyway I have to go now as I am a little depressed tonight. I think that is why I was in my pj's all day because for some reason I am not happy... and it is nothing in particular.
Back to work tomorrow.Bye Bye everyone ChubbyMum posted on 8:27 p.m
I am not going to like the next two weeks. My buddy TGirl is not going to be at the meetings or our walks as she is on school holidays with her kids... which is great for her, but I have been so off track this week with the holiday and the fact that I haven't walked with TGirl that I hope I can get motivated again. Yes I did the walk last night but the food has been atrocious this week. I don't want to put this weight back on... just after seeing my friend in Wellington and achieving my goal that she notices the 10 kilos I have lost a little bit of steam. I want to get the 20 kilos off by the end of the year. I want to feel good about myself again and I have been REALLYYYY bad with not counting the points.... so I have to get my A into G and get to it!
What will get me motivated again? I suppose finding another goal to go for but I cannot work out what. I suppose the fact that my brother in law is coming back at the end of September and I haven't seen him for 2 years... maybe I should aim for that? hmmmmm... I think I will make a goal
So this is it!!!! I want to be at 125 kilos by end of September and yes it is going to be hard but it is what I am aiming for... yes TGirl I know don't be harsh on yourself but I am going to be realistic and at least it is something to aim for because I don't achieve if I don't aim and if I don't get it I don't get it. Just tired of being big. I want to go and buy some nice shoes and some nice clothes and feel sexy again.
Anyway I have to go now as I am a little depressed tonight. I think that is why I was in my pj's all day because for some reason I am not happy... and it is nothing in particular.
Back to work tomorrow.Bye Bye everyone ChubbyMum posted on 8:27 p.m
Saturday, 16 April 2005
I walked all by myself
I did it!!! I went for a 4.3 kilometre walk ALL BY MYSELF!! Wooohooooo I felt so good. I took my time but managed to do it in 55 minutes and had my head phones on and groooved and sang to the music. Yep people must have thought I was off my rocker he he heeee but I felt good. One of the ladies at Weight Watchers drove past and she had the biggest grin on her face and she was waving out the window.... I think she was proud he he he he.
It felt so good and when I got to the shops at the end I had a pineapple ice block it was so refreshing and I felt soooo happy...
Anyway I will write again later tonight but had to get it out. I am on my way to slimsville and I am going to do this! I just have to keep up my exercise Wohoooo
Talk tonight... ChubbyMum
posted on 1:09 p.m
It felt so good and when I got to the shops at the end I had a pineapple ice block it was so refreshing and I felt soooo happy...
Anyway I will write again later tonight but had to get it out. I am on my way to slimsville and I am going to do this! I just have to keep up my exercise Wohoooo
Talk tonight... ChubbyMum
posted on 1:09 p.m
Friday, 15 April 2005
Non day
I thought that I would update now because tonight we are going out to a friends 30th birthday party... woohoooo spa pool and all. I am looking forward to it. Getting out with friends for dinner and for a couple of drinks sounds good. We are on our way to getting out of our square.
Today was a non day really. Went upstairs to our bedroom this morning after taking the boys to creche and school and thought we would read upstairs under the covers as the day had turned out to be a little cold. But we managed to go off to sleep... OMG we needed it and I didn't feel like waking up that is for sure. Went to TGirl's for the afternoon and that was good. She still isn't feeling well and sounds like she needs this holiday away so let's hope that she gets a chance to recoup. I am going to miss her being away for 2 weeks but hey...
Not feeling 100% yet from our holiday and I don't really understand what it is but feeling still shaky like before I went. Mind you yesterday I did walk my oldest to school and then also went to the gym last night so hopefully it was because of that and nothing else.
I think I am going to try and convince hubby to go to dancing classes with me. I want to do some exercise that is fun and I reakon dancing will be good. Was thinking of something like Ceroc or Latin dancing or something similar. Not too sure where here we can do that but I am going to get my backside into order and do it and it will be good for Winter too.
Anyway I better go and get myself organised and get my son from school.
Bye bye
ChubbyMum
Today was a non day really. Went upstairs to our bedroom this morning after taking the boys to creche and school and thought we would read upstairs under the covers as the day had turned out to be a little cold. But we managed to go off to sleep... OMG we needed it and I didn't feel like waking up that is for sure. Went to TGirl's for the afternoon and that was good. She still isn't feeling well and sounds like she needs this holiday away so let's hope that she gets a chance to recoup. I am going to miss her being away for 2 weeks but hey...
Not feeling 100% yet from our holiday and I don't really understand what it is but feeling still shaky like before I went. Mind you yesterday I did walk my oldest to school and then also went to the gym last night so hopefully it was because of that and nothing else.
I think I am going to try and convince hubby to go to dancing classes with me. I want to do some exercise that is fun and I reakon dancing will be good. Was thinking of something like Ceroc or Latin dancing or something similar. Not too sure where here we can do that but I am going to get my backside into order and do it and it will be good for Winter too.
Anyway I better go and get myself organised and get my son from school.
Bye bye
ChubbyMum
Thursday, 14 April 2005
Goals
Woke up this morning and didn't really want to, but had to take my oldest to school. So me hubby and both boys walked to school. It was great but was still not feeling the best. I am not too sure if I overdid it on the holiday or not but just didn't feel 100% today. Slept from 2.30 to 4.30 this afternoon and still didn't feel like getting up but had to get up and get dressed and get over to the gym for my kickboxing class. Yep you guessed it I just could not get into it. I did a half an hour and was so moody that I said to my friend I was going on the bike because I just don't feel like the kick boxing tonight. I spent 1/2 an hour on the bike and 10 minutes on the walking machine and then it was time to get home.
There are so many things hubby and I talked about while we were away. We were looking at prices of houses in Wellington and what sort of jobs and schools there were but couldn't totally decide on whether we want to or not. I still think that we need to make an effort here in Hamilton. We are like reclusive and we tend to stay at home at night and not do anything else. So the decision is to make our lives better, to invite people around and to get out of our square and stop just being… I me that is all we seem to do.
We have got kids and use that as an excuse. So we are going to have get together’s and start to call our friends and do things with them and stop just lounging around at home. Yes we are walking more and yes I am going to weight watchers but you know that is all we seem to do. We want to have card games with our friends… to get out with our kids and other families and to do some night classes and get a life and meet new people and make the most of this life we are leading because you only have one life to live.
My weight loss in the last week has taken a little bit of a dive. I had the 10 kilos to loose before going to Wellington and even though I didn’t weigh in on Tuesday I do think that I lost up to 10 kilos with all the hill walking etc but in the last couple of days I have been so lax on the food.
The best thing was that my friend in Wellington saw me on Saturday night (after we had driven 7-8 hours and I looked a sight) and she came in the door and said “OMG you look fantastic you have lost sooo much weight and your face looks fantastic… well done and gave me such a huge hug. She is 10 kilos lighter than me but it hasn’t always been that way. It used to be that I was like 50 kilos heavier than her. So for her to give me a compliment was fantastic because she is her… I mean she is a fantastic person that always thinks of her friends and when she notices something she tells them…. I always feel so fantastic around her. She doesn’t compare either.
I hate it when friends compare and don’t think before they say something, because I am a different person… I am not the same size or the same person as other people and I really don’t like comparing. I would rather just them notice that I am me and that I have lost weight and I have a lot to loose and that is what I am like. My body isn’t like anyone else’s my habits aren’t like others but to accept that I am going to do this even though it might take longer or it might be harder for me… just accept me.
This entry has been quite long tonight. I just feel like sometime in the last 7 days I have gone off track and I don’t want the first goal to go and that I give up because I have reached it.
Weeks ago our WW Leader said that we have to choose a goal for ourselves so that we can achieve that goal. I tell people that I want to loose 20 kilos in one year and they say “that is being unrealistic” I don’t think so… I mean I have lost 10 kilos (well I think) 2 weeks ago I weighed in as a loss of 8.3 kilos and I was really good until Tuesday (6 days after that) so I do think I reached 10 kilos before then and when I was away I walked up those Wellington hills OMG but I have lost that… I only want to loose another 10 kilos in 8 months.. and if I loose more then great but I don’t see how people can assume that I can’t do it… if I put my mind to it then I can do it and I don’t want it to be a small goal because I will sit back and think arghhh what the hey there isn’t much to go till I get there. I want to achieve more than just the 10 kilo’s I want for people to notice around me… people around me everyday to notice the difference.
OK I will leave it at that. Sorry that it was a marathon entry tonight.
Love ChubbyMum
posted on 8:52 p.m
There are so many things hubby and I talked about while we were away. We were looking at prices of houses in Wellington and what sort of jobs and schools there were but couldn't totally decide on whether we want to or not. I still think that we need to make an effort here in Hamilton. We are like reclusive and we tend to stay at home at night and not do anything else. So the decision is to make our lives better, to invite people around and to get out of our square and stop just being… I me that is all we seem to do.
We have got kids and use that as an excuse. So we are going to have get together’s and start to call our friends and do things with them and stop just lounging around at home. Yes we are walking more and yes I am going to weight watchers but you know that is all we seem to do. We want to have card games with our friends… to get out with our kids and other families and to do some night classes and get a life and meet new people and make the most of this life we are leading because you only have one life to live.
My weight loss in the last week has taken a little bit of a dive. I had the 10 kilos to loose before going to Wellington and even though I didn’t weigh in on Tuesday I do think that I lost up to 10 kilos with all the hill walking etc but in the last couple of days I have been so lax on the food.
The best thing was that my friend in Wellington saw me on Saturday night (after we had driven 7-8 hours and I looked a sight) and she came in the door and said “OMG you look fantastic you have lost sooo much weight and your face looks fantastic… well done and gave me such a huge hug. She is 10 kilos lighter than me but it hasn’t always been that way. It used to be that I was like 50 kilos heavier than her. So for her to give me a compliment was fantastic because she is her… I mean she is a fantastic person that always thinks of her friends and when she notices something she tells them…. I always feel so fantastic around her. She doesn’t compare either.
I hate it when friends compare and don’t think before they say something, because I am a different person… I am not the same size or the same person as other people and I really don’t like comparing. I would rather just them notice that I am me and that I have lost weight and I have a lot to loose and that is what I am like. My body isn’t like anyone else’s my habits aren’t like others but to accept that I am going to do this even though it might take longer or it might be harder for me… just accept me.
This entry has been quite long tonight. I just feel like sometime in the last 7 days I have gone off track and I don’t want the first goal to go and that I give up because I have reached it.
Weeks ago our WW Leader said that we have to choose a goal for ourselves so that we can achieve that goal. I tell people that I want to loose 20 kilos in one year and they say “that is being unrealistic” I don’t think so… I mean I have lost 10 kilos (well I think) 2 weeks ago I weighed in as a loss of 8.3 kilos and I was really good until Tuesday (6 days after that) so I do think I reached 10 kilos before then and when I was away I walked up those Wellington hills OMG but I have lost that… I only want to loose another 10 kilos in 8 months.. and if I loose more then great but I don’t see how people can assume that I can’t do it… if I put my mind to it then I can do it and I don’t want it to be a small goal because I will sit back and think arghhh what the hey there isn’t much to go till I get there. I want to achieve more than just the 10 kilo’s I want for people to notice around me… people around me everyday to notice the difference.
OK I will leave it at that. Sorry that it was a marathon entry tonight.
Love ChubbyMum
posted on 8:52 p.m
Wednesday, 13 April 2005
Back from Wellington
I just got back after a 6-7 hour drive from Wellington... I am a little gutted and feel that it was rigged to the max. I certainly don't understand how the yellow team could have won the hall way when they didn't even finish the hand rail and I don't think their landscaping was good at all. Please don't get me wrong the yellow team are really nice people but I still think that it was rigged.
My holiday was excellent but I am soooo tired and can't wait to have a shower and relax. Not that the holiday wasn't a good one but when you are staying with people you are related to by marriage it can be a little too much in the fact that you have to smile and listen when sometimes you just want to sit in silence.
We spent way too much money on the holiday and thought that maybe we would want to move down to Wellington. We are going to give it ago here for a year and look around, that is a maybe though....
I wasn't very good diet wise on this holiday. I went for an hour walk each day with hubby's aunts but it was a reallllllly slow hour walk and they kept asking if I was ok and it was only because I was bored out of my tiny mind he he he because I have been walking with TGirl that I think going really slow just made me sort of mad he he he. Sometimes people think that just because you are bigger than them that you are unfit. I have been doing regular exercise since January and kickboxing twice a week I think a walk at that pace will not kill me... now I am getting scarcastic but OMG I could have crawled on my knees faster.
I know I mentioned meeting my online buddies in Wellington and I couldn't get off the high for a couple of days. It is soooo weird that I met them..... they are such great ladies and I am glad that I met them so now when I read their diaries I can actually hear their voices etc. Thank you ladies for a lovely lunch and meeting those wonderful little kids.
Anyway I will write again tomorrow but for now I am tired and think I might go to bed.
BYEEEE ChubbyMum posted on 8:11 p.m
My holiday was excellent but I am soooo tired and can't wait to have a shower and relax. Not that the holiday wasn't a good one but when you are staying with people you are related to by marriage it can be a little too much in the fact that you have to smile and listen when sometimes you just want to sit in silence.
We spent way too much money on the holiday and thought that maybe we would want to move down to Wellington. We are going to give it ago here for a year and look around, that is a maybe though....
I wasn't very good diet wise on this holiday. I went for an hour walk each day with hubby's aunts but it was a reallllllly slow hour walk and they kept asking if I was ok and it was only because I was bored out of my tiny mind he he he because I have been walking with TGirl that I think going really slow just made me sort of mad he he he. Sometimes people think that just because you are bigger than them that you are unfit. I have been doing regular exercise since January and kickboxing twice a week I think a walk at that pace will not kill me... now I am getting scarcastic but OMG I could have crawled on my knees faster.
I know I mentioned meeting my online buddies in Wellington and I couldn't get off the high for a couple of days. It is soooo weird that I met them..... they are such great ladies and I am glad that I met them so now when I read their diaries I can actually hear their voices etc. Thank you ladies for a lovely lunch and meeting those wonderful little kids.
Anyway I will write again tomorrow but for now I am tired and think I might go to bed.
BYEEEE ChubbyMum posted on 8:11 p.m
Sunday, 10 April 2005
Met the girls woohoo
OMG... I had a fantastic time today!!!
I met my characters he he he he. I finally got to meet Janine, Jo, Janene, Karen and Helena today and they are the nicest people. What a fantastic time I had... I am sooooooo hyped after that lunch today and feel a little sad that I can't do that once a month or so with them as it was great to have people going through or have gone through the same thing as me. Talking to them was like I had known them for years.
I was telling my husband before hand that it was a little spooky as I was like I was reading a book and I had finally gotten to meet the characters in person. I love reading about them and about their lives and ups and downs and now I can say for sure that I really like these girls as people as well. How fantastic and easy to talk to they are!!! It is really hard to put in words what I feel right now.
The lunch was fantastic and so was the venue... and oohhhh those two little girls were soooo cute.. and their mums must be so proud to have great little things like them.
Anyway I am at my hubby's aunts place and really shouldn't be taking up the phone line but had to jot down what I was feeling and I am going to update this page when I get home next week so I can write more about what we did woohooooo
Chubbymum
posted on 6:05 p.m.
I met my characters he he he he. I finally got to meet Janine, Jo, Janene, Karen and Helena today and they are the nicest people. What a fantastic time I had... I am sooooooo hyped after that lunch today and feel a little sad that I can't do that once a month or so with them as it was great to have people going through or have gone through the same thing as me. Talking to them was like I had known them for years.
I was telling my husband before hand that it was a little spooky as I was like I was reading a book and I had finally gotten to meet the characters in person. I love reading about them and about their lives and ups and downs and now I can say for sure that I really like these girls as people as well. How fantastic and easy to talk to they are!!! It is really hard to put in words what I feel right now.
The lunch was fantastic and so was the venue... and oohhhh those two little girls were soooo cute.. and their mums must be so proud to have great little things like them.
Anyway I am at my hubby's aunts place and really shouldn't be taking up the phone line but had to jot down what I was feeling and I am going to update this page when I get home next week so I can write more about what we did woohooooo
Chubbymum
posted on 6:05 p.m.
Friday, 8 April 2005
Holiday tomorrow - Wellington
Well I have to warn you all that in the next week I might not have time to update on here as I am off to Wellington tomorrow morning wohoooooo... so excited but nervous and upset at the same time.
Upset because I am leaving my mother and the boys home and my mum doesn't drive and if anything happens to the boys I don't know how she can handle it. I get so paranoid about something happening to my family and one little cold sets me for a nightmare too. My dad died of phneumonia (not cancer but was in recovery after 10 years of fighting GEESH) and so I get this fear that I am 8 hours drive away and if anything happens it is such a long way. Yes I am an overprotective mum but I just don't know if I can handle if anything happens to mum or the boys... anyway that off my chest.
But I meet my wonderful online friends this weekend Woohoooo and so excited but nervous... and yep yep I have mentioned that before but I am...
Also I am really anxious about my friend and her winning this Dream Home competition. I haven't been able to sleep properly the last month because I am hoping that they win... and that is not to say that I won't be jealous but she deserves it... I mean she really does she is a great friend and I can count on her for anything she is always there for me.
Been really niggly with food today. Really want something yummy to eat and in a way really bad for me too but I haven't done that today. I am not going to get caught up in thinking oh well I can make up for it tomorrow... I am not!!! because if I do it once then I will find any excuse to do it again and again.
I see people that have lost 30 to 40 kilos and feel soooo jealous of their achievement. I want to be there and keep seeing the 8.3 kilos as just a little amount. Even though when I am wearing my clothes the 8.3 kilos really does make me feel good. I am not having to pull up my undies thinking they are too small now.. as I don't even know what they feel like on anymore which is fantastic and how it should be.
A person that hasn't seen me for a while came to visit my mum today and when I walked in after picking up my son she said "OMG you look fantastic and patted my tummy and said you have lost some of the tummy and in your face too." it felt so good for her to say that. I did feel good and do!
Really tired now and need to go and pack for the weekend. Yep I am really bad for leaving it till the last moment.
Love ya all and can't wait to meet my friends this weekend and thanks for reading.
Love ChubbyMum Steps: 7,894 posted on 8:08 p.m.
Upset because I am leaving my mother and the boys home and my mum doesn't drive and if anything happens to the boys I don't know how she can handle it. I get so paranoid about something happening to my family and one little cold sets me for a nightmare too. My dad died of phneumonia (not cancer but was in recovery after 10 years of fighting GEESH) and so I get this fear that I am 8 hours drive away and if anything happens it is such a long way. Yes I am an overprotective mum but I just don't know if I can handle if anything happens to mum or the boys... anyway that off my chest.
But I meet my wonderful online friends this weekend Woohoooo and so excited but nervous... and yep yep I have mentioned that before but I am...
Also I am really anxious about my friend and her winning this Dream Home competition. I haven't been able to sleep properly the last month because I am hoping that they win... and that is not to say that I won't be jealous but she deserves it... I mean she really does she is a great friend and I can count on her for anything she is always there for me.
Been really niggly with food today. Really want something yummy to eat and in a way really bad for me too but I haven't done that today. I am not going to get caught up in thinking oh well I can make up for it tomorrow... I am not!!! because if I do it once then I will find any excuse to do it again and again.
I see people that have lost 30 to 40 kilos and feel soooo jealous of their achievement. I want to be there and keep seeing the 8.3 kilos as just a little amount. Even though when I am wearing my clothes the 8.3 kilos really does make me feel good. I am not having to pull up my undies thinking they are too small now.. as I don't even know what they feel like on anymore which is fantastic and how it should be.
A person that hasn't seen me for a while came to visit my mum today and when I walked in after picking up my son she said "OMG you look fantastic and patted my tummy and said you have lost some of the tummy and in your face too." it felt so good for her to say that. I did feel good and do!
Really tired now and need to go and pack for the weekend. Yep I am really bad for leaving it till the last moment.
Love ya all and can't wait to meet my friends this weekend and thanks for reading.
Love ChubbyMum Steps: 7,894 posted on 8:08 p.m.
Thursday, 7 April 2005
Really down in the dumps today
What is up with me today?
I can't get it together today!
I mean, I like my job but I am sooo bored with it. I get like this after a year in a job I think it is because the challenge has gone and I know what I have to do and it bores me I get bored so easily! I need to be challenged but I can't keep on like this because it is a good job and great people I am just really bored.
I think after having Wednesday off and did the walking thing with TGirl I just feel like I want to do that sort of thing everyday! I know, I know I have it easy compaired to others but I just don't want to be wasting my life in this little office of mine. All by myself and just work work work. I want to walk during the day and spend time with the kids in the afternoon and take my mum out places to fill up the day.
I feel so lonely today! I know I am not alone but that is how I feel. I think I am realizing just how much weight I have to loose and I am not giving up but it has got me down a little I mean I have only lost 8.3 kilos it isn't like I have lost 30 or 40 or something and that is how I am treating it when I have so much more to go. Today is a bit of a low compared to yesterday and I am not liking it one bit.
It is such a shame that we can't do what we want and still live happily. I mean why can't we all just forget money all together and have everything we want or need and be happy with each other. Yes I do know it will never happen and there are reasons why. I also realize I should be happy with what I have as I am a fortunate person to have what I have and the family I have. Just sad today!
ChubbyMum
Steps taken today: 9,281
I can't get it together today!
I mean, I like my job but I am sooo bored with it. I get like this after a year in a job I think it is because the challenge has gone and I know what I have to do and it bores me I get bored so easily! I need to be challenged but I can't keep on like this because it is a good job and great people I am just really bored.
I think after having Wednesday off and did the walking thing with TGirl I just feel like I want to do that sort of thing everyday! I know, I know I have it easy compaired to others but I just don't want to be wasting my life in this little office of mine. All by myself and just work work work. I want to walk during the day and spend time with the kids in the afternoon and take my mum out places to fill up the day.
I feel so lonely today! I know I am not alone but that is how I feel. I think I am realizing just how much weight I have to loose and I am not giving up but it has got me down a little I mean I have only lost 8.3 kilos it isn't like I have lost 30 or 40 or something and that is how I am treating it when I have so much more to go. Today is a bit of a low compared to yesterday and I am not liking it one bit.
It is such a shame that we can't do what we want and still live happily. I mean why can't we all just forget money all together and have everything we want or need and be happy with each other. Yes I do know it will never happen and there are reasons why. I also realize I should be happy with what I have as I am a fortunate person to have what I have and the family I have. Just sad today!
ChubbyMum
Steps taken today: 9,281
Wednesday, 6 April 2005
Parent teacher interview
It felt like Saturday here today.. but it was good not to have the kids around. I felt like I got so much achieved today.
Went to TGirl's to go for a walk and we went for a 4.3 kilometre walk in an hour Woohoooo it was fantastic. I felt really good and then after that I actually did the groceries too and then by that time had to go to school for parent teacher interviews.
OMG OMG I was a proud mother when I got out of there. My son turned 5 in August 2004 and started school (which is the age in New Zealand) anyway they get tested at the start of the year (in NZ it is end of January after summer holidays) and so they do a test on what the children are up to without the teaching so that by they end of the year they have something to compare...
Welllllll my son is at a reading age of a 6 and a half year old now.. wooohooo and she was impressed with his writing and maths too. I was just so happy that I could have done a little jig... but I also told Corbin how proud I am but I didn't want to overdo it because a friend of mine killed himself because he wasn't matching up to what his parents had wanted him to be and by the end had had enough that he shot himself... so I am going to make sure that my sons do what they are capable of and I will not push them to exhaustion but in saying that (dancing a little jig now woohooo) he is doing so well I am sooo proud.
Ok I am off that now.
Feeling exercised! Well fed! and just basically happy today.
Anyway that is me for now...
ChubbyMum
Steps today: 11,246
posted on 10:08 p.m
Went to TGirl's to go for a walk and we went for a 4.3 kilometre walk in an hour Woohoooo it was fantastic. I felt really good and then after that I actually did the groceries too and then by that time had to go to school for parent teacher interviews.
OMG OMG I was a proud mother when I got out of there. My son turned 5 in August 2004 and started school (which is the age in New Zealand) anyway they get tested at the start of the year (in NZ it is end of January after summer holidays) and so they do a test on what the children are up to without the teaching so that by they end of the year they have something to compare...
Welllllll my son is at a reading age of a 6 and a half year old now.. wooohooo and she was impressed with his writing and maths too. I was just so happy that I could have done a little jig... but I also told Corbin how proud I am but I didn't want to overdo it because a friend of mine killed himself because he wasn't matching up to what his parents had wanted him to be and by the end had had enough that he shot himself... so I am going to make sure that my sons do what they are capable of and I will not push them to exhaustion but in saying that (dancing a little jig now woohooo) he is doing so well I am sooo proud.
Ok I am off that now.
Feeling exercised! Well fed! and just basically happy today.
Anyway that is me for now...
ChubbyMum
Steps today: 11,246
posted on 10:08 p.m
Tuesday, 5 April 2005
Woohooooo lost, lost, lost
Woohooo
I did it!!! I dit it!! I lost... can you see the little dance I am doing!!!
2 kilo's, TWO Kilo's, 2, 2, 2, 2.... or 4.4 pounds Wohoooooo.. 2.2.2.2.2.2 love that figure.
With all the walking and kickboxing this week it worked!!! It worked OMG OMG I am so stoked...
Thank you TGirl for pushing me on these walks... yes I was dying at the time but I did it!!! and going again tomorrow!! woohooooo
I don't know what else to say but 8.3 kilos gone!!! and gone forever!!!
Thanks everyone for reading!!!
Woohooooo
Chubby Mum
I did it!!! I dit it!! I lost... can you see the little dance I am doing!!!
2 kilo's, TWO Kilo's, 2, 2, 2, 2.... or 4.4 pounds Wohoooooo.. 2.2.2.2.2.2 love that figure.
With all the walking and kickboxing this week it worked!!! It worked OMG OMG I am so stoked...
Thank you TGirl for pushing me on these walks... yes I was dying at the time but I did it!!! and going again tomorrow!! woohooooo
I don't know what else to say but 8.3 kilos gone!!! and gone forever!!!
Thanks everyone for reading!!!
Woohooooo
Chubby Mum
Monday, 4 April 2005
Great week tracking
OK the day went really fast today.
Wasn't feeling that good this afternoon I am thinking that maybe the V's are doing it to me... I am feeling quite shaky and it has been happening since Wednesday last week. I was thinking it was the amount of k's I walked last Wednesday which was way too much for my first time but then I was getting better towards Sunday and today I had a V and was not feeling good at all.
Anyway so I went to my kickboxing class tonight and it was good. BLONDE was asking so many question about the walking with TGirl and in the end I ended up saying I went for two walks and enjoyed it. I can't believe how many times she kept asking and I wasn't giving her enough information so kept at me.
TGirl phoned before the kickboxing and we had a good old chat... quite a lot about the new American Idol. OMG are there some really BAD singers in that lot he he he this time... well the ones that we heard tonight already.
I really enjoyed the kickboxing tonight. I thought that after a week of not going because they didn't have the classes that I would have been puffing so much but no I was sweating woohooo which I like now because I know that I am working but I wasn't puffed and exhausted at all.
Only 5 days till I am in Wellington and I am looking forward to it. Can't say I am looking for the drive but hey.
Weigh in tomorrow night... I am really nervous about it. I am nervous because I have been working hard with the walking and tracking this week and past times when I have done so well I haven't lost but gained!
So I am really nervous... yeah I know wait till tomorrow to find out but hey!!! I want to loose this bloody 10 kilos for the 11th April... that was my first big goal. Roll on that 10 kilos he he he
Chubbymum posted on 10:16 p.m
Wasn't feeling that good this afternoon I am thinking that maybe the V's are doing it to me... I am feeling quite shaky and it has been happening since Wednesday last week. I was thinking it was the amount of k's I walked last Wednesday which was way too much for my first time but then I was getting better towards Sunday and today I had a V and was not feeling good at all.
Anyway so I went to my kickboxing class tonight and it was good. BLONDE was asking so many question about the walking with TGirl and in the end I ended up saying I went for two walks and enjoyed it. I can't believe how many times she kept asking and I wasn't giving her enough information so kept at me.
TGirl phoned before the kickboxing and we had a good old chat... quite a lot about the new American Idol. OMG are there some really BAD singers in that lot he he he this time... well the ones that we heard tonight already.
I really enjoyed the kickboxing tonight. I thought that after a week of not going because they didn't have the classes that I would have been puffing so much but no I was sweating woohooo which I like now because I know that I am working but I wasn't puffed and exhausted at all.
Only 5 days till I am in Wellington and I am looking forward to it. Can't say I am looking for the drive but hey.
Weigh in tomorrow night... I am really nervous about it. I am nervous because I have been working hard with the walking and tracking this week and past times when I have done so well I haven't lost but gained!
So I am really nervous... yeah I know wait till tomorrow to find out but hey!!! I want to loose this bloody 10 kilos for the 11th April... that was my first big goal. Roll on that 10 kilos he he he
Chubbymum posted on 10:16 p.m
Sunday, 3 April 2005
TGirl
What a busy weekend. My new found friend and I just get on like a house on fire and it is still really freaky to know that someone else has the same interests as me and we got on like a house on fire.
Went for another walk today around the Hamilton Lake (not a small lake) took us just under an hour of walking with her dog today... I felt so much better after doing it as I needed to get some exercise... but did feel it in my calf muscles.
Spent yesterday with my new friend and it was soooo relaxing and like we had known each other for years and as you can tell I can still not get over the fact that I have found a friend that I have so much in common with. Found out today that her hubby works at a job that really he should be doing from the town (which is like is a LONG way away) and they might move there for a year. OMG OMG I always have this happen. All my friends move away... what is it? Am I jinxed or what? Am I going to go through my whole life with friends that I like going to another part of the country or world?
I love my hubby so much and he is my best friend but there is nothing like another woman to talk to... I miss being able to say whatever I feel like at the time with my friends... I can't do that with BLONDE I have tried but she like looks past me like she is saying "Yeah I know you are talking and I know I have to pretend that I am listening for you to say something so that you will listen to me" but with my new friend hmmm what shall I give her for a nickname..... hmmmm I think TGirl... yep that is fitting.
So anyway TGirl yayyyy for our new friendship.
Been doing a little more cross stitch lately too. I don't do much in the summer as it is too hot to sit around and do it plus I have OOS problems so doing it for too long is not good.
This weekend has gone so fast it is unbelieveable and it won't be long till I am in Wellington WOOOHOOOOO I am going to meet my online friends Woohooo.
Anyway enough from me.
Love ChubbyMum posted on 5:12 p.m
Went for another walk today around the Hamilton Lake (not a small lake) took us just under an hour of walking with her dog today... I felt so much better after doing it as I needed to get some exercise... but did feel it in my calf muscles.
Spent yesterday with my new friend and it was soooo relaxing and like we had known each other for years and as you can tell I can still not get over the fact that I have found a friend that I have so much in common with. Found out today that her hubby works at a job that really he should be doing from the town (which is like is a LONG way away) and they might move there for a year. OMG OMG I always have this happen. All my friends move away... what is it? Am I jinxed or what? Am I going to go through my whole life with friends that I like going to another part of the country or world?
I love my hubby so much and he is my best friend but there is nothing like another woman to talk to... I miss being able to say whatever I feel like at the time with my friends... I can't do that with BLONDE I have tried but she like looks past me like she is saying "Yeah I know you are talking and I know I have to pretend that I am listening for you to say something so that you will listen to me" but with my new friend hmmm what shall I give her for a nickname..... hmmmm I think TGirl... yep that is fitting.
So anyway TGirl yayyyy for our new friendship.
Been doing a little more cross stitch lately too. I don't do much in the summer as it is too hot to sit around and do it plus I have OOS problems so doing it for too long is not good.
This weekend has gone so fast it is unbelieveable and it won't be long till I am in Wellington WOOOHOOOOO I am going to meet my online friends Woohooo.
Anyway enough from me.
Love ChubbyMum posted on 5:12 p.m
Friday, 1 April 2005
ANGERED
I had a comment on my diary yesterday and I have deleted it!!! I am a little concerned about why someone would be so mean as to attack another person on someone else's diary.
This is a short entry but I have to say I don't like it!!
If you have something to tell me please do as I will read it... but I am not going to condone attacks of others here, as this is not a forum, this is about my weight loss and for me to meet some people in the same boat as me, and to get the days problems or joy out.
I didn't want to ever have to write an entry like this because I can't understand how people would be like that! It is gutless and I do think they have to look at themselves first. If you have a problem with a certain person then you need to confront that person and not spread attacks on another diary.
Anyway! still confused and have to say I don't understand what type of person would be like this!! WHAT IS THE POINT? did it make them feel good? if so then I pity the friendships you have.
I know that I write about BLONDE in here but I have never said who that person is! And never will! But the diary is for me to get my frustrations of the day out! It isn't because I have this diary to attack people... and I admit I do attack BLONDE here but not so that others know who she is or that I am making her feel bad because I couldn't do that! I couldn't purposefully do that to someone that you know will read it! and if I knew she read it then I would go to her and tell her everything and sort it out or move on from the friendship
Anyway
That is my point of view!!
ChubbyMum posted on 11:33 a.m.
This is a short entry but I have to say I don't like it!!
If you have something to tell me please do as I will read it... but I am not going to condone attacks of others here, as this is not a forum, this is about my weight loss and for me to meet some people in the same boat as me, and to get the days problems or joy out.
I didn't want to ever have to write an entry like this because I can't understand how people would be like that! It is gutless and I do think they have to look at themselves first. If you have a problem with a certain person then you need to confront that person and not spread attacks on another diary.
Anyway! still confused and have to say I don't understand what type of person would be like this!! WHAT IS THE POINT? did it make them feel good? if so then I pity the friendships you have.
I know that I write about BLONDE in here but I have never said who that person is! And never will! But the diary is for me to get my frustrations of the day out! It isn't because I have this diary to attack people... and I admit I do attack BLONDE here but not so that others know who she is or that I am making her feel bad because I couldn't do that! I couldn't purposefully do that to someone that you know will read it! and if I knew she read it then I would go to her and tell her everything and sort it out or move on from the friendship
Anyway
That is my point of view!!
ChubbyMum posted on 11:33 a.m.
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