Tuesday, 22 May 2007
Thanks for the comments yesterday... I needed them that is for sure.
I was stewing about it all day and I shouldn't be but I just couldn't believe that an adult couldn't come to a another adult about silly children..GEESHHHH and one that lives 2 houses down. PHEW
I went back to the teacher in the afternoon and said "I am sorry for being so abrupt I was just upset she couldn't be a grown up and come and tell me" she said "I totally understand and I agree with you totally". So at least the teacher isn't thinking that Quinn is a trouble maker..
OK so as from last week I am not going to Weight Watchers anymore.
I weighed at home instead of Weight Watchers because I am tired of paying money and yoyoing and I love my leaders but there is too many people at our meetings now that I feel I can't talk to them about things anymore (which was helping me so much) so hubby and I have been strict and doing it at home. I know that this week isn't going to be wonderful because my weigh in's take a week to notice and Mothers day food was TERRIBLE and so that is going to catch up to me this Wednesday.
I am weighing in on Wednesday mornings and instead of going to Weight Watchers on a Tuesday night hubby and I are going for a walk and in the middle of our walks we are training for something that I have wanted to do for a while buy been chicken.
I want to be able to run around a park (close to home) that the boys play soccer on so we are going to do that every Tuesday night and I am going to start off slow and jog as far as I can then walk, then jog and then walk until I can do the whole run myself.
On Sunday we went for a bike ride with my boys and a friend of Corbin's and decided to stop at a park and play soccer and I was running and kicking the ball and trying to keep it off the boys and it felt good... and ok everything was wobbling everywhere but I felt great that I could run with the ball and do little soccer kicks to keep it off the boys and I was laughing so hard that I want to be able to do more of that.
So that was my inspiration to set this goal of jogging the whole park. I am not too sure how big the park is but next time I am down there with my bike I am going to go around it and work out how big it is.
I have thought about leaving Weight Watchers for a while because I am paying money and not budging and I know that is me that is stop me from losing and not Weight Watchers but I think after 2 years I am honestly bored with Weight Watchers and only stay because I LOVE the leaders but it isn't enough anymore.
I have also found something that has made me want to lose this weight... I am a weird person WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD but I don't do well with competition against someone if they know it... and I don't lose for material things either as I honestly don't need anything... but I do thrive on (not sure what you call in) but my motivation is to get lighter than Debbie...
She has done really well and started at 130 kilos and is now 113 kilos and it is frustrating me because when she started at 130 kilos I was 125 and now I am only 121 ya know... so I am not going to let this happen (I am not telling her either as I don't want a competition sort of thing) I know I know that doesn't sound right but it makes me feel like I am going for gold but the person doesn't know to upset the situation to piss me off ya know.
So she isn't going to be lighter than me anymore!!! SHE ISN'T
The next person to get is my hubby... as he is 105 at the moment and that isn't going to be for long because I want to be lighter than him and when people meet him and see his wife I don't want them to think OMG she is bigger than him anymore and why is he with her... NOT ANYMORE
So I have been for the last week wanting to tell everyone but I wan't convinced myself until today that I was doing the right thing leaving Weight Watchers... and to be honest I can imagine the WW leaders are going to phone to find out why I am not there and try and get me back but I need more support for the money that I am investing... because I can take $36 a fortnight and get myself some clothes ya know.
I just have to keep focussed and get this weight off and not go back to gaining!!!
So my scales are 800 grams heavier than Weight Watchers so I am going to adjust mine to make it the same as Weight Watcher so I can keep up with the same as them if I decide to go back then I am going to know how much I weigh.
So tomorrow morning is weigh in time... and be warned it will be a gain because Mothers day is catching up on me but next week is going to be good!!! I just know it.
I am back to tracking and I have a personal blog that only me and hubby are writing in about how I am feeling about my food and what I am eating and he is commenting about how we can change things to make things better or smaller etc and it seems to be working that is for sure.
I have a smaller plate now too and the portions have come down and I am trying to have better breakfasts... I have to concentrate on this and get myself sorted....
So tomorrow morning here we come!!!! Wonder what those lovely scales will say hmmmmm.