Tuesday, 18 September 2007

Really upset

Oh God I just feel sick to my stomach.


My friend that is going through this breakup well I think I told you how the daughter is scared of her father after the time he came and had a huge fight with her mother and grabbed her mother and she had bruises the next day (remember I have never seen him ever ever be like this so it is a shock)... and all while he thought the kids were asleep but the 9 year old wasn't.


Well the 9 year old daughter only wants to stay at his place with this woman of his (slut I call this woman because her kids said to his kids it is their 3rd Dad OMG) in the day time and refuses to go at night so he said to her mother if she doesn't come for the whole night then she cannot come at all EVER and said he has had enough and doesn't want her there then... but is going to take the 6 year old son for 4 days over the holiday and any other time he asks.


OMG why would a father put his daughter through this... he said that my friend has poisoned the daugheter and that is why she doesn't want to come but OMG wouldn't you think if she was doing that that the younger boy wouldn't want to go either? Wouldn't you think she would have said no every time he has asked for the kids yet she hasn't... it is sooo unfair and I have this horrible horrible tummy thinking what this poor girl is going to feel when she is told that her own Dad doesn't want her over unless it is under his terms.. they only broke up in May he needs to let her adjust and to see him with another woman and family is too much too soon.


I don't know how to help her I don't know what to say...


God I feel sooo helpless and I know that I can only be there to listen and help my friend but I am sooo disgusted in what he is doing.


I am sitting at my desk in tears because I can't believe he would hurt his daughter like this. I did know that they didn't get along that well when he was living there and that he definatly had his favourite in his son because he did sports and things that they did together but to reject a 9 year old just because she doesn't want to stay the night is beyond me.


I didn't want to write in here but I need to get it out... I am sitting here stewing about it and I need someone to respond and to help me deal with this...


I can't understand how a guy that has been really nice and a good friend for like 20 years do this!!! It is a huge change and he is treating his ex like she is evil when he is the one the cheated and left her and she didn't even see it coming and months beforehand he was telling her loved her and planning all sorts of things...


I just don't understand how life can be so cruel...


It makes me look at my life and hope like god that it doesn't happen to me where Hubby leaves me for another woman and I have to cope with the same thing.... because to be honest I always thought that Hubby and and this ex friend of ours was just the same they were gentle, loving caring family men that would do anything for their family.


I can't understand how he can be a teacher and not realise how this sort of break up effects a child... I can't believe he would find another woman that is a mother of one of his students and sleep with her at a camp with all his students around... I can't understand how one man can change sooo much.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi there - have had trouble accessing your blog, and leaving comments. Not sure why, but hope this one works. Re your friend going thru the separation - does she know about acessing free counselling thru the family court - she just needs to pick up a form from local district court. Seems like they need some mediation for the kids sake!! Poor things - its the kids who bare the brunt of emotional crap. Take carexx

Chris H said...

This man deserves to be shot! And I don't blame the girl for not wanting to be there overnight. Poor kid.

just janene said...

I think that the mum of the 2 kids (your friend) needs to tell the ex to pull his head in, and if he won't have his daughter then he can't have either of them. Fuck him. What a total wanker. (excuse my language, but this really pisses me off). Like the first comment says (whoever it's from!), she should try to use the free counselling sessions through the court to try and sort out the child access arrangements.

Big big *hugs* to you, caught in the middle of all this.

Too Fat To Fly... said...

Separation is never easy on any member of the family, yet there is no need for this guy to be treating his young daughter in such an appalling way!

He is supposed to be the adult after all ;-(

Poor kid...

It's a shame that you have been caught up in all this, though it's understandable that you are concerned for your friend and that you want to support her...

x

Anne said...

Ditto to the others with their comments. You really would be the best supportive friend anyone could have, just so caring. Don't marriage breakups bring up the worse in some people!

WeeeSplat said...

Argh what an arse...
men can be such animals... :(