Thursday, 20 September 2007

Not in a good headspace

Not in a good headspace tonight...

Going to list what I did today but not going to elaborate

  1. Took kids to school

  2. Spend from 9 till 12.30 with Corbin's class making funky glasses with the kids

  3. Went to coffee with my friends and my mum tagged along too.

  4. Picked up the kids took Corbin to Optometrist because he needed an eye test and his glasses broke (the day after I made the appointment). $800 later argghhh

  5. Got home cooked dinner

  6. Bathed the kids

  7. Put the kids to bed

  8. Now sitting here and read an email from my friend and about what the creep has done now and I am sitting here seething and feel like I am a failure for not wanting to help her tonight and wanting to kick his butt so hard that he won't be able to have anymore kids EVER again and feel like putting a hex on him so he never ever has a happy life ever again. I hate feeling like this.. it is not me but I do feel like this.

Going to post this and sorry not reading blogs and not staying on the computer tonight.


Helena said...

awwwwwwww *hugs* sweetie.

Hey check your contents insurance policy ... you might be able to claim Corbins glasses or at least some of it! I did mine last year.

Wanna_B_slim said...

Oh dear... sorry that creep is making you so angry...
take care... there are alot of guys out there like him...

Too Fat To Fly... said...

Oh dear, this creep is getting to you, though that's kinda understandable seeing as you care for your friend and you obviously want the best for her :-(

Try not to take on too much though. Not at the sake of your own health and general well-being!

Look after yourself...


Lyn said...

it's ok to feel like this sometimes and it's ok to blog about it! Hope things start to feel better for you soon.

Thanks for sending me your addy again. Brainfart, shoulda tried chubbymum ... too much blonde in me (or should that be grey)

*hugs chick!!*

Lyn said...

Hey comin over to Hamilton next week sometime to see my sis ... wanna catch up for a coffee?? you have thurs off right? If I make it early morning Thursday does that suit? ... have to check my calender and see.

Or maybe the next week

Jules said...

Don't let her burden become yours, I know, easier said than done but there is only so much you can do to help people until you just have to state your opinions and let them go to it and sort themselves out.

Unless ...... there are kids at risk and then you don't bloody hesitate and you involve someone.

Love ya.

just janene said...

Big hugs for you Mandz...

It's great that you are obviously such a caring friend, but it does worry me that you are taking this on board too much and getting really stressed about it. I know you want to help your friend, but as Jules said, maybe it's time to take a step back and let her deal with it herself. Hard to do I know, but I think that it is affecting you too much. Either that or rip shit out of the guy and tell him what you think of him for being such a w*nker and get it off your chest.

Talk to you over the weekend maybe?

Name: Lynise said...

Hi Mandy,
I am in total agreement with the others regarding how much you seem to be taking your friends problems on and letting the effect you so dramatically.
Your loyalty and care towards her are so supportive but it seems like you may be allowing this to effect your own emotions.
Remember that only the two of them were in the marriage together and for what ever reason the relationship has turned to custard.

In every situation we each have to decide how we will react/respond to what is going on. Do not let their mess allow you to lose your dignity and sink into wanting vengence or harm on someone else. Negetivity breeds negetivity, so no good can possiibly come from allowing yourself to be part of anything that pulls others down.

As hard as things may be for your friend, this is not your battle. She will need you to listen to her hurt and frustration and be there as a support person, but if you are supporting her by continuously talking about what her ex's has done, then I'm afraid she will have every reason to stay stuck in this low.

Instead I would encourage you to be supportive but not get drawn up into bad mouthing this guy as it does nothing except allow the cycle of hurt to continue. His actions may continue to cause her grief but she needs to start rebuilding her life and start drawing strength from things that are uplifting.

I know your friend will be huring, but for her own mental health she needs to start re-building. This won't happen over night as her hurt is a griefing process and she will go through a range of stages, (including anger). I would hate to think another year or two down the track that she will still be stuck in this place. As much as her ex may frustrate you, she will be needing positive encouragement regarding pro-active steps she may need to take to get her life back on track.

You have mentioned her struggling to pay the mortgage. This would be causing me big time stress, so I'm wondering if she is still holding out hope rather then facing the the reality of her situation by realising she probably NEEDS to do something about this. Maybe a sale is needed to downsize.

I hope all this makes sense. Just my thoughts. I don't like seeing you stressing out about this and feel you may be sinking into a hole in your efforts to try and help. You are truely a great friend to this person and she is really lucky to have someone so caring in her life.

Stay strong Mandy and try not to let yourself be pulled down by all of this.

Take care darl

Rachel said...

Yep I agree with everyone else, don't let this drag YOU down.

He is being horrible etc but there's nothing you (or her) can do to change him so maybe look at trying to move on.
I would advise her to take note of everything that is happening in case a messy custody battle happens but apart from that, just be there and listen when she needs you.

Getting her focussed more on 'moving on' with her life is proberly better than her fighting whith him. I realise she has to deal with him in regards to the kids but maybe she need to draw a set of rules up for him and say she won't deviate from them *shrug* (same treatment for both kids or he gets no kids - no further discussion).

celtic_girl said...

I also agree with everyone else,don't let the creep get you down, channel your energy to your friend, I beleive in Karma, "what goes around comes around" He will get his, don't worry. What is this guy's name- Rick with a silent P!!