Tuesday, 31 July 2007

No more dragging me down.

In the last two months I have preoccupied myself with my friend and her breakup and it is doing my head in. I have been there for her like I would want my friends to be in return but until today I didn't realise that I have been reading and replying to her emails and then feeling really really depressed like I was going through it.

Until driving my kids to school today I didn't realise that I was feeling like it was happening to me and that I take everything that is happening to my friends on board like it was my problem and not theirs... such a weird thing that is hard to explain.

I can't understand how a couple that for 11 years loved each other and looked fabulous together can have this happen and the guy hasn't even told her what the problem was just that he is getting on with his life and he has a new woman and a new family and stuff his old one and treating his kids like crap.

I know it is not my life this is happening too... but I feel powerless to help her and she has no one and no family and the friends she had were all co friends with her ex.... it must be the hardest thing ever to go through.

I have been talking to hubby about it and making sure that we are talking and that he would never treat our kids or me like that if we ever broke up because it is the nastiest thing and we have made an agreement that never ever ever would we put each other down in front of our kids and that we would try everything possible to keep together and go to counselling etc if that was ever to happen first (which my friends ex didn't do).

I am the luckiest woman on this earth I reckon.

I have a supportive husband and he isn't that bad looking either (if I may say so myself he he). I have 2 great kids that are caring and funny and loving and I have a great mum that lives with us (even though sometimes she drives me crazy I do love her). I have a great life... working part time at a job that isn't that bad really and quite flexible.

I am losing weight (even though it is slow) I get to go on bike rides and walks with my kids and we do things together even though most of it stuff that doesn't cost too much as we live from pay to pay (and that is totally our fault because we choose to live in the area we do) but that is ok too.

I think what I am trying to say is that I am trying my hardest to look at all aspects of my life to make sure that I keep losing this weight and that my whole life is happy because when things are down in my life I lose the motivation to lose this weight and I don't want that to happen.

In the last week I have tracked and I have tried really hard. I have only gone to the gym once but I am ok with that because I am a little bored of the kickboxing and the gym at the moment but I don't think that has been too bad for me... I am still going for walks and trying to park further away from things too.

I am hoping (HOPING) that tomorrow mornings results on the scales are good for me... I want to be in the teens. I have only 800 grams to get to the teens and then I will be the HAPPIEST PERSON IN NZ. So all cross your fingers for me.

What have I done today to make me feel proud: Today I had sushi instead of another takeaway my workmates had... so proud I didn't succumbe to Burger King.


Helena said...

*casting a spell* .... 800gms be away with you! *ting*

Chris H said...

What a lovely post, kinda how I'm feeling too, very lucky and happy with my life!!! Can't wait to see you on Saturday.... you and your darling man.

Name: Lynise said...

Hi ya,
I have just read your post regarding your friend and although I am certainly no expert on relationships I do think that people really do show their true colours way before a relationship ends.
If a guy/woman is going to be and idiot or nasty they will have displayed these characteristics during the relationship.
I knew long before Warren and I seperated that we wouldn't have any problems when we seperated as he is an honest and kind person so I knew he wouldn't suddenly turn into a monster.
I have a friend who has gone through a similar breakup as your friend. (suddenly left without any real warning) but when we sat down and talked about it there were many times when her ex was a real jerk.
I am conviced that once you live with a person you will see their absolute true character. If they are capable of treating people badly or being a jerk when they don't like someone, then they are more the capable of doing those exact same things to the person they are breaking up with.

I really hope your friend is strong as the hurtful things he does regarding their children (and being able to find a new family so darn quickly) will be cutting like a knife. My friend is in a very similar situation and I can see it hurts like hell.