Tuesday, 30 May 2006

Lost in my weigh in

Hey everyone.

Well I lost 300 grams tonight. I jumped on those scales saying to the ladies it doesn't matter how much I lose tonight because I have been tracking this week and I have been drinking my water and I brought a pair of new pants 3 weeks ago... that were tight and a week after I got them I found someone to take them up as they were too long and she gave them back to me 2 weeks later and in 3 weeks later they are too big and they were the biggest bleep bleep nightmare as I had to keep pulling them up all day. I HATE THAT but I am glad that I am going down in size but I hate the fact that I have just brought them because I need some clothes and they don't fit.... grrrr

So anyway I said that to my WW leaders and even though I was trying to convince myself I was still upset with only 300 grams. I was expecting 500 and I know I know I lost and didn't gain but 500 would have been better ya know.

So I had a huge talk with my WW leader because I was getting worried that maybe I am doing something wrong. I am sticking to points and I AM drinking my water (even though I hate it). It was great to really think about it. I have been trying to thinkn about what is making me go wrong but not really seeing it but tonight while one of the leaders were talking it dawned on me by what she was saying so I went to the other leader to chat.... she thinks I am eating too much towards the end of the day instead of the beginning so I am going to try 4 days a week this week to eat more for breakfast, morning tea and lunch and less at the end of the day.

I don't think I am eating all my exercise points either not all I can have and maybe that is why I am getting angrier about feeling hungry at the end of the day... I mean it feels like I am cheating and that is what is dawning on me now. But I have to do it and I have to eat up to my 12 exercise points extra a week.

I get for the kickboxing class 13 points OMG so one class a week would get me the amount I am allowed to go up to... but I do 4 times that and that is why I am still feeling hungry at night.

I do also think that I need to have a treat night a week because I am getting angrier and angrier at not being allowed stuff I want and I am not going to go overboard as I have set my mind right now after a year... I am not wanting to go overboard and not wanting to gain my weight back.

I figure if I can lose 300 grams etc and keep losing and never gain then I will eventually get there. So I have to sort out this food because the exercise isn't a problem and I DON'T want to give up the exercise at the moment I REALLY DON'T because I am happy with what I am doing and I find it quite addictive.

Anyway going to bed now. Really tired and still a little bitter because I feel like I am doing everything right but not get everything I wanted...

Love ya

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