Friday, 18 March 2005

What I look like... and being positive



I have come to the conclusion that I am a negative person. I don't want to be! I don't want people to read my diary and think OMG she is complaining again... I don't want to read again. I don't know how to stop!! I have decided that I am going to try and be a little more positive everyday... But it isn't easy so there will be negative things in here.

Why do I do it? I think I do it because in real life I don't want to bore my friends or husband silly with the complaining so if I say it in here then at least I am getting it out and not holding it all in to make me crazy.

I had a fantastic email yesterday from a lovely new friend I have met online and I thank her for it. I had tears in my ears when reading it because she was so caring when she wrote it... I am at work writing this so I haven't got the email here that she sent but I should put it in there. (Thanks Janine)

I sometimes wonder how she gets the positive attitude she has. I have always been a worry wart and a person that is negative... not overly negative though but I do put myself down and not think of the brighter side.

I just get so impatient and I know the longer it takes to come off the longer I am going to keep it off. I have lost 5.2 kilos in 9 weeks and that is great really but I want it to be like 7 or 8 kilos and not just 5. The thing I need is for someone I know to notice the difference because it would boost my confidence no end. I do realise that I don't need that and I should be very happy with what I have achieved and that it is off and not on. It is just the way my brain works that if someone notices it then it just gets me going.

I started this entry to thank Janine and also mkia and fat queen too for the notes and emails just recently and the support it has really helped.
Well it is only 2 more days of full time work left then I am back to my part time work and I can tell you I CANNOT WAIT I have had enough of this job I am doing (while doing my own I might add) and feeling like a dogs body in the job. This lady has worked here for almost 30 years (I was told that yesterday) and I reallllllly don't know how she has managed to stay sain with such a mundane job with no appreciation. She is a trooper and a fantastic person and she is always happy to help.... I do lift my hat to her.

I just got an email to say Janine got the job she was after WOOOHOOOOO FANTASTIC NEWS it could not have gone to a more well deserving person that is for sure!!

Have you ever wondered what I look like? I read others diaries and sit there wondering what they look like... I mean I love reading them and feel like I have known them all my life but I have never never seen a photo of them.. Would be interesting to know what people think I look like..
Wanna tell me?

Anyway signing off for now.

P.S Woohooo for you Janine.

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