Friday, 16 March 2007

Private - Conversation with Karen (Weightwatchers) about Debbie


Mar 16, 2007 at 12:31 PM
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From: Mandy []
Sent: Thursday, 15 March 2007 22:43
To: Karen Mullin; 'Kylie Burne'
Subject: From Mandy

Just thought I would say (in case I missed saying on Tuesday) Kylie have fun in Aus and don’t think of us... he he he well do think of us and how you are having fun in the sun and we are out here working ho hum he he he he but you enjoy.

Missed weigh in on Tuesday and I have no excuse... I was going to say I did but really I didn’t... finding it hard at the moment! I am yo-yoing and I have 1.4 to get to 35 kilos and feels like it is taking so long to get there and I am tracking... but I can’t say every choice I am making is a good one either but the motivation has gone with all that is happening in my life at the moment.
Anyway... missing our chats at weigh in’s lately but hey the place is sooo busy.

Bye Mandy
From: Karen Mullin []
Sent: Friday, 16 March 2007 08:37 a.m.
Subject: RE: From Mandy

it is all part of the journey unfortunately, but that is why getting to goal is so special. Just keep doing the best you can and I would love to see you next week as we missed you. You never know coming along might just inspire you to lose that 1.5!.

I was hoping you would be there is this week as a lady I work with started and she had about the same to lose as you did - I was hoping to get you to have a bit of a chat to her as she is very nervous about the whole thing.

Take care
From: Mandy []
Sent: Friday, 16 March 2007 10:19
To: Karen Mullin
Subject: RE: From Mandy

Do you mean the lady is coming this Tuesday or came last Tuesday?

I don’t want to give up Karen... I am just doing stupid things in my head with Debbie and I don’t want to... and I stopped telling her my weight and tried to do it that way so the friendship wouldn’t suffer, but she went strange on me and is strange at work with me too.

I didn’t want that.... I want this journey to be for me and not for anyone else but my head isn’t getting around it. When Debbie would gain she would get all moody and she told me it was me not telling her my weight that was hindering her....and I can’t help her!!

I can’t help her because I am finding it hard myself let alone taking all her worries ya know. I hate feeling like I am being selfish as I want to help but I am going back to the same Mandy where I want to help everyone else but I am not helping myself.

Maybe your friend coming will give me a new lease.... to show someone that hey you can do it and it will give me the motivation to see her and think... I cannot go back to the old me.

Just finding it hard ya know. Weight loss is a hard thing... it isn’t just about food ya know.. it is all the head stuff too and I don’t do well with that.

I finally got my business cards too so I will have to give ya a couple.Thanks Karen
From: Karen Mullin []
Sent: Friday, 16 March 2007 10:43 a.m.
Subject: RE: From Mandy

funny you should mention that as we had a big conversation with Debbie on Tuesday ( please do not tell her that). She told us that you had had a conversation with her about not telling her your weight as it was not helping you and since then you had been doing really well - she was so pleased for you. She said that she appreciated that you needed to do that for you (we acted surprised like we did not know that you had talked to her).

She was a bit upset as hadnt realised that she was competing with you and that was never her intention to make it hard for you. She said since then she has really been struggling and has realised that competition must motivate her. I said to her that it is really good when someone can be honest with you and now she needed to find her motivation from somewhere or someone else so I gave her some suggestions.

She is just very stressed about everything that is happening at work, the problems she has had with her study and that she set herself that 20kg goal by her brothers wedding and now she is not going to make it so she was feeling like she has failed (and her mother will ask her if she made it or not).

We set a few small goals and she is really looking forward to some exercise thing that you are doing - so that is great. We ended up not leaving WW until after 8pm as we were talking with her - all of this is strictly confidental as you know but I just dont want you to think it is about you.

Yes the lady from my work came last Tuesday (13th March).
From: Mandy []
Sent: Friday, 16 March 2007 12:23
To: Karen Mullin
Subject: RE: From Mandy
Debbie mentioned she had a talk with you guys and was there for a while.

Not sure why she is stressed about work her job is secure and no teachers will lose their jobs... unlike mine.

Her mother is paying for the weight watchers that is why she is worried. I know she is upset about not losing the 20 kilos when she said she would but I did say to her to be careful because she might not continue losing 1.5 to 2 kilos a week but then again she might but sometimes you can’t keep up that sort of loss every week. She said she would be under the 100 kilo mark but March... I didn’t have the heart then to say don’t over do it and come up with failure.

I know I am sounding selfish... just that she is starting to be just like Kris and I had to distance myself so that I didn’t end up wanting to get out of this friendship... I still want to be friends with her and I don’t want the weight thing to be an issue. I got upset with her a couple of weeks ago when in front of one of the other Weight Watcher girls she mentioned that it was my fault that she wasn’t losing weight as since I didn’t tell her anymore she was going down hill.

I said to her that it isn’t my fault that she is not losing weight just because I want to keep my weight to myself. The other lady there (who we don’t always speak to) overheard and agreed with me and said to her that it is her journey and just because I wanted to keep things to myself doesn’t mean that she can’t still lose weight. She made a big deal of it. I used to like coming to Weight Watchers but now I quite honestly don’t if I am going to be harassed every week.

At work she was making me feel like I wasn’t doing well and telling people that I was wearing a pair of her pants that are wayyyy to big for her now... and it hurt Karen. I never did that when she first started and I gave her a pink top that was too big on me. I didn’t mention to anyone that it used to mine and she made me feel so small when she did that. It really hurt and it made me feel like crap.

I have worked damn hard to get to 33 kilos lost and it was like she was belittling me. Even one of the ladies at work couldn’t believe her saying in front of them all. So I threw all the clothes she gave me away... I don’t want to have that Karen and it has made me so unhappy since. I would never do that to her or anyone so why would she do that to make herself feel good. I did say to her when it happened that I wasn’t happy. Sorry... I shouldn't be doing this.

Bye Mandy

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