Tuesday, 9 August 2005

Help me help a friend

"If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got."

I know that our Weight Watchers leaders have said this a lot and thought that I would put in tonight as I think I finally got it.

I have a friend... yep it does happen he he he he and I can see that she is going through a lot lately with her weight loss and I know she is doing the hard sloger at the gym but I can also see that all the hard slog she does at the gym is not helping one bit to the fact that the food she is putting in her mouth is not good for her.

I am not sure how to help her as I have only been friends with her for a little while. I can also understand that coming from a person who is bigger than her can be like (what they hell do you know) but I can see it happening and see how frustrated she is getting and it is all falling apart around her.

I do know where she is coming from as weight loss is the hardest thing that I have ever attempted in my life and it is an ongoing problem that just can't be done in 6 months then forget about it. Because in the end a year down the track you will be kicking yourself thinking why didn't I just stick it out... was it as hard as I was letting my mind tell me?

I went back to weight watcher 2 years ago and stuck it out for a couple of months and then gave up as I found it hard with loosing then gaining then loosing and I look back now and think I would have had the weight off by now if I would only stop my mind from convincing me otherwise. I do know that I am the only one that can help me and with my friend I know that she is the only one stopping herself but I don't think she gets it.

I used to be jealous of what she had achieved in such a short time and how good and happy she was looking but then deep down I can see there is something missing, something that maybe she doesn't know is missing. Life maybe is what she is missing.

When my Dad died 5 years ago I realised I have only one life to live and blaming others or blaming things is not going to help me achieve what I want... we could die tomorrow and all the problem we have with our partners or kids is nothing and I don't want to go to my death bed thinking.... I wish I would have tried a little harder, I want to go to my death bed thinking, I taught my kids the right things and they are happy and I spent the time with them and never regretted it and I completely loved my husband and our life together and I am content that I did all that I needed to do in my short life.

I don't want to hurt her feelings as she is a kind and generous lady but I feel a sadness to see that if she just doesn't keep up with the weight loss then she is going to be even more unhappy and that the support we get from Weight Watchers really helps because it keeps us on track and sane and there are other people out there going through the same thing. Because when she sees she isn't loosing any weight then the next thing to fall off the wagon will be the gym and then she will be right back where she started. How can I help my friend? Or do I just let her give up Weight Watchers and watch? Which I don't like to do as I feel like I want to help.

Anyway my rambling for the day....


No comments: