Cathan's mum stopped me this afternoon while going to get Quinn from class and she said "have you lost more weight" I said no I have stayed the same... she said "your face looks a lot slimmer" OMG that made me feel good.

I am buggered today from the weekend and I don't think I slept that well and so the whole day felt really slow like in slow motion or something.

I had to travel a lot today with work and went to teach the Directors some of the accounts. OMG sometimes these ladies need to go to time management classes because one of them keeps saying I don't have time... I don't have time... and I said "well too bad because it needs to be done and from next week you will be doing it all yourself" OMG she thought well if she put it off and off then I would end up doing it for her NOPE NOPE NOPE. I have to get hard that is for sure.

So I am off to Morrinsville tomorrow for work so that should be exciting... I love the Director out there she is a hoot. We thought we migh go out for morning tea so that will be great.

Been reading a lot of scrapbooking magazines lately. OMG I am so excited about being a Guest CT I have already done a layout below woohoooo.

I need to do another one which I will try and do tonight (if I don't go to bed early because I am not sleeping right).

I didn't go overboard on my food in the weekend but I must admit I haven't tracked since Friday so I need to get my act together.

Anyway hope everyone has a fabulous night.

Love Mandz

Camping and thoughts.

Home from camping holiday.

Feeling better after talking to Lyn (thank you). We laughed and played triominos and drank and ate and had fun. It was a good night... (LYN - Am I bovvered? does it look like I am bovvered he he he).

Camping was fun we went on Saturday and came back today but by yesterday afternoon THAT WAS IT I had had enough and wanted to be home. I had fun but had enough of the sun and had enough of the small bed and just plain had enough.

I have an amazing tan he he he and even my mum noticed when I got back and said so (OMG a miracle).

I weighed this afternoon and it was good (for being on holiday and not tracking) but I am going to wait till tomorrow morning because I weigh in the morning and I am not going to change that.

I have decided this year I am concentrating on me and not going to worry about what everyone else is doing. I am going to do things for me and my family.

I am going to book my mother and I on a croquet course for 6 weeks. We brought her a croquet set for Xmas and we don't know how to play it properly and she has wanted one for like OMG since I was a kid and never got one. So I saw it in the continuing education paper and it is on Thursday's from 9.30 to 11.00am and so I am going to drop off the kids and we are going to do this together. I think that if she can get out and meet other people then she might make some friends other than bingo friends and might meet some people her own age. She finds it hard and stays home a lot so this way I can try and get her out so that I can have a life too.

I have also wanted to learn how to play the game too and spend some time with mum other than shopping (which btw I REALLY HATE (not like you aye Chrish he he).)

Jeremy is looking at finding a night course for us to do as a couple and then the kids have their soccer, scouts, and Corbin is learning the saxaphone so this year is going to be full on.

I am going to concentrate on the weight loss but I need to also have a life that I am happy with and last year was a nightmare.

When I get down to 99.9 kilos Jeremy and I are going to go on a Kayaking course.

I want to do more of that sort of thing with the family and bike riding and maybe some tramping ?? not sure but might be interested in tramping?

Had a text from a work colleague yesterday about things happening at work and it made me paronoid (and really it shouldn't) it is just everytime I go on a fkn holiday something happens with my job in the last 3 years. First the owners of my creche sold to a big corporation (australian) and then the next year that corporation sold it to another bloody australian corporation and now they have some changes but it doesn't mean that I will lose my job and if I do well... will just have to find another one... simple as that. If I don't have a job we could lose our house etc but I can temp... and there are options and I have to keep on reminding myself of that.

Mind you my job is sending us up for a course in Akl (on my fkn annual leave I might add) for 2 nights and 2 days and they are paying so I would say that they wouldn't be doing that if they wanted to get rid of us wouldn't you say so? (I am a born worrier as most of you know but hubby keeps telling to stop).

I have done lots of swimming, reading, boogie boarding, walking, cleaning he he he, cooking and basically enjoying the holiday. Quinn's girlfriends mum texted us on Sunday and asked if we minded some visitors on Sunday and I said No and we had a great time. We took them to the bath tub races at Bowentown. Man I thought they would be amateaur things but there were motorised ones and some of them didn't even look like bath tubs and one group had team shirts etc matching the boat OMG it was sooo cool. But really hot to watch.

We took our blow up boat (with oars) he he and the kids had fun with that at Anzac bay and we swam out with them and it was nice.

I have one more week till I have to be back at the work place ho hum and not wanting to as I am enjoying the time away in the sun.

Anyway tired and thinking about going to bed early tonight.

CM

10926

<<< Big BANG >>>

Work was a bore!!!

Wednesday's is my slow day so I was all geared up to get all the little niggly things done with work in the morning and then he he he do some digital scrapbooking in my lunch break... NOPE NOPE NOPE...

It was my lunch break and then I heard BANGGGGGGGGGG and the lights and the computer went out!!! OMG I jumped from my seat to the door as I thought that a car had smashed into the wall by my office. Then thought well we must have blown a fuse.

The girls at the other end of the building said they saw lightening outside and the power lines had broke and that was what the bang was.. OMG OMG OMG it was scary. So from 12.30 to 2.30 we had no computer, lights, anything and I was bored out of my tree... most of the girls were busy because they had the kids (work in a creche) but I didn't and the cook couldn't and neither could another lady so we were in the staff room reading and chatting for all that time... GUTTED so I didn't get my work finished or manage to do my digital scrapbooking at lunch GEESH.

Then went to pick up the boys from school and realised they had Milo Cricket on today so I stayed for that and got roped in to being a parent helper... in my work outfit OMG I was hot.

Hubby is fixing something on the caravan ready for our weekend and I am just chilling out and then we are going for a walk after dinner....

All in all an ok day... feeling drained though... I think I have a bug that just won't go away because I just feel heavy

Basketball Hoops

After such a wonderful weekend as per below... I am in a grumpy grumpy mood today

Got back to work after only taking off 1 day and moaning people galore OMG... and not because of anything that you did Weeesplat.... (thank you btw for covering my invoices) but because they are whining wingeing shits that I work with.....

It has not put me in a good mood and I had such fun being away from work that I realise I don't want to work... I enjoy being at home and doing things but unfortunatly for me I cannot afford to not work ho hum.

Only today and tomorrow and then I am off work till Monday again WOHOOOOOO.

I am just sad and depressed and unhappy... I don't want to be and I tried to be positive and went out at lunch time instead of staying in but I feel fat and ugly and frumpy and and and the list still goes on.

I know that you are thinking... just think positive and it will be alright but today I just can't.

On a lighter note though:

Corbin has been on my back about a basketball stand hoopy thing (which I have already brought for Xmas that he doesn't know about) but anyway I said to him that if he could save his pocket money that I would pay half of it for him... knowing darn well that with only $5 a week it will be Xmas by the time he can afford it... so he was sooo excited.. and worked out that if I was going to pay $35 and he pay $35 that it would take him 7 weeks to save the money... so I was happy about that because he is young I was sure that a week or two in there he wouldn't have saved the money so it would be xmas by the time he got it NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO that was all stuffed up this morning he he he.

The boys phoned me at work and Quinn said "We have money and I want to spend mine" I said "What are you talking about?" he said that their Great Great Nana and Grandpop sent them money for their birthdays.

I asked Quinn how much and he said $20 so I said "is that $20 each or between you" he said "between us"... wohooo I thought that is great... but OH NO it was $20 each he he he (which was fantastic of them that is for sure)...

So anyway Corbin gets on the phone and said "MUM (in an excited voice) I have only got 3 weeks till I can get my Basket ball hoop" ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH so I told Jeremy what he said and he was laughing and laughing and I said "stop laughing what am I to do".. he said "you have to give it to him and the money he gives you we can put towards another present for them for Xmas"

SHIT SHIT I thought I had the boys all sorted for Xmas and now I have to find another thing that I can buy for them... when will I learn to shut my mouth huh ;-)

I hate buying Xmas presents too late because I don't like going in to town with all the impatient people buying... so now I have to think of something else and here I was thinking I was a smarty and getting the presents all sorted for them early GEESH....

Anyway will update later.

Love Chubbymum

Weigh in - 11 July 07

Weigh in day at home

Loss/Gain: Lost 400 grams
Current weight: 120.3 kgs
Total loss: 34.4 kgs

Small challenge: 119.9 kgs
Started: 12 June 07
How much to go: 400 grams

Well I am really pleased with the loss of 400 grams. I figure if I lose 200 grams a week and I get more then I am happy with that because it is a loss and not a gain aye.

Since leaving Weight Watchers 5 weeks ago I have only gained once... so that is great aye. Ok it hasn't been a lot of weight I have lost but it is a loss and I am not in this for a race.... I am in this to change my lifestyle and to take it off for ever and NO WAY am I going to get back up to the almost 160's EVER EVER EVER AGAIN.

Only 400 grams to get to the teens... and it better be off before I come down to ChrisH's place. We got confirmation yesterday that our room is all booked and ready for us WOOHOOOO... it is going to be great.

I haven't worked out what I will get for the Xmas presents yet OMG that is a hard thing to do. Also food hmmmm.... we don't have a kitchen in our room so that will be interesting too but I am sure there is something I can take etc he he he will be a challenge.

I had a crap day yesterday and couldn't even write in here. Got to work feeling wonderful and then at morning tea my son phoned (now he doesn't usually) and then said "hold on mum nana can talk now" which worried me.

Apparently mum's sister in law phoned from Bermuda (where most of my family is because I was born there and so were my parents etc) to say that Mum's sister was in hospital as she had 2 mini strokes and she can't talk as everything is slurred (this sister just came out of an operation 10 weeks ago where they took out one of her kidneys).

Now that isn't all..... at the same time telling her about her sister found out that mums brother in law died and also that one of mums best friends died... so as you can tell she was not in a good mood.

So I finished work and went home as she had the kids and spent the day at home... was not a happy place.

So the story is.. mums sister who had the stroke and mums brother in law were once married (still friends though it wasn't a terrible break up) and a week ago they were all together for their daughter's wedding. So the poor kids have their mum in hospital and their dad just died and they both live in different countries. OMG imagine that...... The stroke happened before her ex died so that wasn't the reason she had a stroke.

I am travelling down to Rotorua today for a business meeting with one of the new girls down there. The bosses in Auckland suggested that I go down and help her out and I might be able to help her out. OMG so they are paying for travel and for lunch woohooo... She sounds really nice in her emails... it will be great to catch up with her.

I have my mother in law looking after the kids and I am taking my mum down to get her out of the house and she is going to shop while I am there. Then straight back home as my mother in law has things to do when I get back ho hum. Would have been good to stay down there for a while and catch up with people grrrrr oh well I suppose it is great that she is looking after them at all....

Will tell you all when I get back from Rotorua today.

Love Chubbymum

So much to do and not enough time.

Wow the last couple of days has gone past soooo quickly....

Wednesday
Work was ok... couldn't wait to get out of there. Even though I got 4 more creches to do in my 21.5 hours of work I managed to get it done and time went really fast. Sometimes I reckon they think I am a miracle worker. I invoice 10 creches in 21.5 hours and the lady that left was doing 11 creches in 40 hours OMG.... I know I get my work done but GEESH sometimes they take advantage.

Took the boys to soccer practice then picked up Helena from her hotel and we took off for Kickboxing... it was a good kickbox and there weren't a lot of people there... how great is that. I was sweating (not as much as usual grrrrr) maybe I was feeling a little self conscience he he he because of Helena being there he he he but she is such a darling and she looked like she had been doing kickboxing all her life... what a thrill... he he he.

Thursday
Spent the day getting a hair cut and taking mum around places and I got some beads and stuff to make some bracelets.... they look so cool. Mum took them tonight to show off at Bingo he he sooo cool. The boys made a bracelet each... Quinn did one for his teacher and Corbin made one for his Nana. So most of the night was spent making them and it took my mind off food.

When trying to write in here I can't work out what to write... I have felt like I haven't stopped for a couple of days and now trying to write about it I can't think of what to say.

I have been really trying this week with food and with exercise so I have a feeling it is going to be a nice loss this week (not a lot but nice).

Had my PT today and OMG it was the best with Joy in such a long time... we did a lot of bag kickboxing and sit ups and steppers and bench press and leg lifts etc it was the most amazing time and I felt slim and skinny and fit than I have felt in ages. It revved me up for the day that is for sure.

I haven't wanted to get on the computer for a couple of days and just wanted to do other things apart from the computer so I am sorry for being away for a couple of days.... it has revived me tha tis for sure.

We have my brother in law and his girlfriend and my mother in law coming over for dinner tonight as it is my brother in law's birthday.... which is good but they have just come back from luxenburg and Berlin and I am sooooo jealous and now the whole night will be my mother in law sitting there smiling and thinking that her younger son and his girlfriend being the best in the world and how intelligent they are and she talks to the girlfriend like she is the bees knees (and she is a nice person) but sometimes I wish she treated me like that when hubby and I were dating... I got so much hell from her when we dated and I hated the woman like you wouldn't believe so now seeing how great she is with the girlfriend makes me sooo angry.

I sometimes think it was because I wasn't intelligent enough or skinny enough or rich enough for her son... she blamed me for hubby not finishing his degree (2 papers) and I was the one that kept him at the University for as long as he stayed and I supported him (not like she did) he lived with me and I paid the bills and went to work and there was no help from her. I get angry sometimes about the whole thing and how she tried to stop me seeing him etc... OH it makes me sooo angry.

Anyway better go as they will be here soon ho hum.

Chubbymum

Ahhhh Italy!!

The day went really fast today... we got up had breakfast and then went to our yukkky grocery shopping, home and out to the library to get books and spend some time with the kids.. It was nice sitting in the kids section on the couches and reading. I got some kids books out on Italy as I SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO want to go there and I wanted to read about it.

I must admit I always thought that if I didn't read about it then it won't mean it won't happen. I have been putting off reading about Italy, Tuscany, Venice because they are my dream places and I want to go there but I know that we can't really afford it right now and really can we ever afford it hmmmm.... if we win lotto maybe but not unless we do.

How do people do it? I have a HUGE mortgage and can't really afford to go or maybe it is because I have a HUGE mortgage I can't... it is all priorities isn't it. Mine is to have a good house over my head. I suppose I see a holiday as LOTS of money spent in such a short time and what do you have to show for it. At least with a house I can make money on it and have it every day ya know... I know I know we still have to have experiences but my priorities is my home.

Anyway.... been ok with food. I haven't gone overboard like last weekend but still wanting to eat my arm off with this TOM.... I don't remember ever having that much of an appetite with my TOM when I was bigger? Or maybe it was because I didn't take much notice of it... did anyone else ever have that? Do you remember?

I spent tonight doing a 10 year olds birthday invitations and it was fun. Hubby and I up to our necks in glitter and pink and purple and fairies he he he it was sooo much fun. I did only 3 of them as they are going ice skating.

Also before we went and did the invites hubby coloured my hair.... I must say I thought it was bright when I first saw it but I am getting to like it he he he... feel bright and happy.

.......................................................................

Update Monday Morning

Well Helena is here today woohooooo she is going Kickboxing with me tonight (hopefully as it depends on if she can get out of work quick enough he he) but I am sooo excited as I really like Helena.

I feel on top of the world today.... I am at work and I have my new hair colour and I feel like a million dollars. I love the richness... it is sort of a chocolate colour with reddy highlights and it looks fab (well I think so anyway). I have been unpacking my new computer for work and I have lots of new goodies here in my office... nothing can bring me down he he he.

Gave the invitations to the 10 year olds mum this morning at school andher daughter gave them to her friends and they adored it and then there were about 10 other girls hanging around them so I felt chuffed when they did that as I am not really a girly girl with glitter and pink etc so I did well I reckon.

And a work lady came in today to see if I was still doing a bottle for her hubby so... money is rolling on in woohooooo.

Now I just need to sort out an accountant to help me do a spreadsheet of some kind so I can keep up with the money etc and I will be fine.

OMG... but the weigh in isn't going to be good this week as I have my TTOM and I ALWAYS weigh heavier... but I know that the week later will be good because I have been good.

Anyway better get on with my work he he he.

Love ya all
Chubbymum

Papaya ARGGHHHHHHHHHH

First day of 10 week challenge....
I haven't done too bad and I am feeling good about it and I am soooo greatfull that Celtic girl and I are doing it together and do you want to know the MOST WEIRDEST THING EVER... we both weighed in for the challenge and we both have a start weight of 121.6 he he he DO YOU NOT FIND THAT THE WEIRDEST THING EVERRRRRR??? Woohooo Celtic girl we are going to do it!!!

I must say that I had a tear in my eye reading Celtic Girls blog here today re the awards and what she wrote about me... I never knew I was one of the first blogs she ever read and OMG how she described me Nahhhh he he he I can't be that person.. I don't see myself as that person he he he... WOW (tear coming down my cheek)

Welcome Abba and I am sooo glad you are doing the 10 week challenge with Celtic girl and I... maybe us three should get our heads together on how we can keep each other motivated aye!!
............................................................................................
Yesterday...

Work was ok yesterday... it seemed more relaxed or something and I had plenty of time left to do little bits and pieces.

Went to the garden centre in the afternoon after work to see if they had any swamp plants because my mother in law gave us 2 caterpillars and a little branch of swamp plant but they had eaten it all and she didn't have more.... but they didn't have any and the boys had pocket money of $2 and they wanted to spend spend spend so I suppose it was better than spending it on lollies and they both brought a punnet of flowers each he he he cute aye.

After we saw Tania driving down the road so I texted her to see if she had an swamp plant and OMG she did so she gave me the whole tree as her caterpillars were getting eaten by praying mantis grrr so I took the plant and put our two caterpillars on it and now they are living happily ever after he he he can't wait till they go into a chrysllis.

Tania phoned me at work and said "are you doing anything on the 22nd July?" I said "ummmm No I don't think so" and she said "good I hope you have $250 as well" OMG I took a breath and said "What the hell for?".

She said "I have booked you and me in for the Wedding expo and we are going to share a stall" OMG OMG OMG that is when I freaked and said "I don't know if I can do that" she said "well too bad!!!"

I think I am too scared to do it!
I know I can do the invites just that it is like being judged and what if no one books me or wants to visit me?
Also how do I do a stall with my invites (or half a stall?)
How do I present my stuff and how do I present the stall???
OMG only 13 weeks until I have to have prices and sets of Wedding stuff.

So I called my friend that has just finished her studies in accounting and she came over last night and we went through all the stuff about GST and if it was worth registering for GST etc but really in the long run until I earn $40,000 or over it isn't worth it just yet. But she has shown me ways to claim for things and to do my tax returns.

So I went this morning and got a business bank account and a business manager that will help me with anything I need.

I got a record book for my mileage and a Calendar for my wall.

I felt empowered and sooooo happy that finally I think this is going to BE THE RIGHT thing for me and this is the business I am going to succeed in and if it takes years I don't care because it is something creative and I am happy doing it.

So I have worked out a 13 week plan to get things done for the Wedding Expo woohooooo, and I have to keep to it so I can get this right. I am a Virgo can anyone tell he he he?

I weighed myself again this morning (ok I am not addicted just wanting to keep myself on track) and I weighed at home at 121.1 kilos (equivelant to WW 120.3 kilos) woohooooo. Now I have to just keep going down in the right direction because I don't want to go back to feeling bad about myself.

Took the boys to a 2 hour holiday program at the gym this morning so that I could go and get all my stuff done like business bank account and stuff and they just enjoy it and it doesn't cost me anything because hubby and I are members so 2 hours a week in the holiday's is fanbloodytastic.

Last night when my friend Denise came over to talk about GST we asked her for dinner and the boys were on their best behaviour and then didn't have to be asked and they got their showers (remembering that they are 5 and 7 years old) and they cleaned their teeth and cleared the table and set the table and went to bed and read their books before lights out and they didn't disturb us by getting out of the bed OMG I was soooo proud of them (and was wondering where my boys were he he he)

So this morning hubby and I said to the boys that we were really happy with how wonderful they were last night and how they made us proud and I treated them today. Ice Age 2 was on sale for $19 so I went and brought that and brought a cake mix so that they could cook a cake and have for afternoon tea and watch the DVD... (which is what they are doing now while I update my blog he he he).

Kris phoned me while I was on my computer yesterday and OMG she talked for 45 minutes on the phone and I just said ah yes ah and by the end of it OMG what was I thinking why didn't I just say piss off? Whooppeee she has gotten her life together and worked out this and that... well if she would have listened to her friends a year ago then there wouldn't be a problem.... yep yep yep finally over her... yep yep yep sad sad sad person.

Love ya
Chubbymum
.................................................................................................

Today's Food:

Breakfast: English Muffin, Chicken Bacon, Egg
Lunch: English Muffin, Chicken Bacon
(hmmmm just wanted another one for lunch sue me he he)
Dinner: Corned beef, Potatoe, Carrot, Cauliflour, String Beans
Snack: 5 Marshmellows
Exercise: Walked 40 minutes with boys around the block

..................................................................................................

Yesterday's Food:

Breakfast: 2 Sandwich Bread, Chicken
Lunch: Vogel Bread, Chicken, Pickle, Lettuce
Dinner: Chicken Tikka (homemade), Rice, Beans
Snack: Chocolate Brownie, V (went out for morning tea and this is my one treat this week).
I am going to let myself have one treat a week as I need to have a treat.
Exercise: Walked 40 minutes with boys around the block

Internet at home a dog

I have broad band and it is still a DOG!!!

OMG having major problems with it at the moment and it is driving me insane. It is faster to read blogs etc at work GEESH.

Today was an ok day... worked and nothing much else.

I did get a compliment today from a lady at school (who incidentally is a friend of Kris.. the one that Kris has been leaning on). Well anyway this lady said that she has been meaning to tell me for weeks... she said "you look fantastic! I bet you are feeling great!" OMG that was so nice of her I couldn't get over it.

She said that she had been over at Kris's all day and she is still depressed. I said "the woman needs a job and have said that all along" and she said the same thing to Kris today... so at least this other friend of Kris's isn't falling for it and telling her exactly what I have been saying.
Enough on that subject.. I was just soooo happy to get a compliment from someone I have only said hi to and not really had anything to do with it was nice.

Work was good. Got my new printer today and that was fantastic.

Had a long talk to my boss in Auckland and asked how flexible she was with the hours and she said she understands how hard it is with kids and with in reason we can negotiate my times so that is soooo good. So I am going to swap my Monday and Tuesday times so I can take Quinn to soccer so I am rapt with that.

There was a big email that came around to all of us today saying that the Directors of the creches didn't know but there will be a couple of changes and then she said "Don't panic" OMG who wouldn't panic when you put that word in there. I said to her I am panicking... she said that it just means the order that I do my work in will change and nothing much else so I am happy with that.. woohoooo. I thought the 1st of April would come and they would say well thanks but we don't need you anymore.. but after thinking on that.. they wouldn't give me a new printer (BRAND NEW HE HE) if they were going to get rid of me would they aye... woohooo.

Been so so so so good with my food today.

I have only eaten 19 points out of my 24 and feeling really full because I had lots of fruit and I had a chicken salad for lunch and I had a salady dinner with roast beef and lots of tomatoes and coleslaw and lettuce and beetroot... it was sooo healthy.

I have a feeling that tomorrow I will gain because to tell you the truth I have been slack.. I haven't felt like there was any motivation in me and people aren't talking about weight loss too much on the blogs so I wasn't getting much motivation to keep me going.

I have only got 21 kilos (that is if I haven't gained tomorrow) but anyway... 21.4 until I get under that 100 kilo mark... and I want that to happen this year everyone.. I really do!! The food is my problem! Exercise isn't the problem what so ever.

OHHHH I forgot to mention there is a huge ho ha going on at the gym now too. The guy that owns the gym doesn't want a lot of different trainers working there under different business names and so in all his glory has decided that there will only be one business and it won't be Joy's or Daniels or the other two trainers there but a couple that are there... so if Joy and the rest of them want to stay then they have to work under this other couples business.. WHAT AN ARSE the owner is... so Joy is finding another place to rent so she can start her personal training business. She can't poach us at all and has told that to us in no certain terms. But if we are to move in our own accord she can't do anything about that either. I can't wait till it is official and then I am going to give the owner a piece of my mind!!! because some good trainers are going and that isn't fair.

I don't want to give up Joy... I know there has been trouble in the last 4 months but I really feel like I achieve a lot in our personal training so we are going to see what happens and if she starts a gym with these other people then Jeremy and I are thinking of moving to it because finding someone that you connect with on the personal trainer front is really hard. So the Lean that was supposed to start tomorrow night has been put off for a couple of weeks until things settle down and she knows what is happening and she said if all else fails then she will be doing it from her garage.. and that is fine with me.

OHHHH am I feeling talkative tonight.

When Jeremy got home the kids, Jeremy and I went for a long bike ride and I chose a route that had lots of hills and then we went and played soccer in the field and then rode back... it was great because Corbin and I were trying to get the ball off each other and my heart rate was going up and Quinn was soooo enjoying kicking the ball and learning how to stop it. I enjoyed it so much and the boys asked if we could do it again tomorrow so obviously they enjoyed it too. Quinn used to hate going for bike rides with us until he got his training wheels off and now we can't keep him off it is great.

Lynise has put me on to a lovely lady that is doing Optifast and has been videoing it and so I got chatting by email to her today and she is lovely. So if you are reading Genelle welcome... I am not too sure if she wants me to put her link but if you do Genelle then please leave a comment and I will link it.

Ok.. so I am off to do some more invites he he he creative stuff again woohoo.

Love ya all

Mandz

P.S I have been thinking about moving all my stuff back to blogger? but private what do you guys think?

Kate does it cost to be with your blogging??? I need to find somewhere that I can be happy and it is ok here but I cannot seem to work out how to get a template that I like... and it be me... hmmm and there are some features I miss from blogger.

BYYYEEEEE

Comments
Chris H wrote:
Mar 19, 2007 at 8:43 PM
Reply
Delete
Phew girl, when you wanna yak you can! Now, as for Mike's hair... it's on Saturday's blog post I reckon...

Kateypie wrote:
Mar 19, 2007 at 9:01 PM
Reply
Delete
Yeah it does cost, but for me it's well worth it. I've tried about 6 different blogging websites and by far it's the best one. I love it! We justified the cost by thinking about how it is my hobby & support - every day! So the cost isn't that much compared with some hobbies. You can do a free trial, and have a play around :-)

What a day

Feb 5, 2007 at 8:33 PM

OMG I have been so so so good all week!

I haven't had a V

YES YOU HEARD IT I have not had a V all week... that is a hard thing for me to do for those of you that have been reading for years... I am addicted to V but I did it and I kept to points or just under and didn't go under and didn't. I am so proud of me this week.

I did more exercise this week and really tried and focussed on going longer or further at each exercise and I hope so so so so much that I lose this week.

I got a compliment today from a young teacher at my work and she said "wow you look fantastic have you lost more weight" I felt like on cloud nine after that.

Work has been a nightmare with the take over and the lady that came to sort out the take over was in a rotten mood today. I don't know what is happening with my job! I don't know who my boss is anymore! They asked for me to change my working days to Mon,Wed,Fri and I was upset and she said that she can't make me change my days but what a pain in the fucken ass having to come in one day off the next then in the next it is a pain and I am not going to do it. Our centres have survived for the last year (and made a profit selling us too) with the hours I do now so why should I change? I will be fighting this.

I have been forward thinking in the last week about my Life Coach course and that the bloody government isn't going to stop me so I went and applied online for a student loan anyway and they sent me out the forms to sign and said the only thing that I need to do is sign and send back and then they would contact the institution they even had the institution on their drop down list so we shall see what will happen. I hope that it all works out and I get to do my course as it brings out a passion in me.

I am sore he he he he sore!
Love ya all
Chubbymum

Comments

Chris H wrote:
Feb 5, 2007 at 9:01 PM
Hells Bells, where to start?? No V - amazing! Keeping to points - friggin fabulous! Getting student loan for Life Coach - YA F---KN HOO ! fingers crossed it all works out for you, and as for the job, fight !

Been tagged

Jan 30, 2007 at 2:59 PM

Believe it or not this is the fourth time I have tried to put this up.

For some reason I accept it and it deletes have of it grrrr so I left it a day so that this silly problem will go away.

Today was an ok day... really full on work wise but that is ok. (Don't usually work on Thursdays but worked half day today)

I got tagged by Chris (Diet Coke Rocks):Four things about Me:

A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
- Bank Officer
- Research Financial Administrator
- Computer Consultant
- Computer Teacher

B) Four movies I would watch over and over:
- Under the Tuscan Sun- Chocolat'
- Anything James Bond
- Over the Hedge

C) Four places I have lived:
- Bermuda
- Auckland
- Hamilton
- Hamilton (another subdivision)

D) Four favourite T.V. shows:
- Shortland Street
- CSI
- Bones
- Biggest Loser (addicted)

Well my friend Tania opened her shop today and it looks really good... quite jealous but really happy for her as it looks really good and she seemed so happy. We are going to her grand opening on Saturday which she is expecting people will buy from and to be honest I can't afford it and when she showed me all the stuff she was having in her shop last week I was saying Oh I like this and that and so today when I went to visit the shop she said "I made sure I didn't put that necklace in the window as I know you really liked it and might buy it" OMG I didn't say I would buy it but she assumes I am going to and to be quite honest we are sooooo skint with money at the moment I don't have the heart to say I can't.. I also don't want to look like a stinge either ya know.

I offered to look after her 3 kids this afternoon as the poor buggers were stuck in the shop most of the day as she didn't have anyone to look after them. I had my two and her 3 and then the little boy up the road was lonely so I had 6 kids to watch over this afternoon so not suprising I have a huge headache...

I also had an arguement with my wonderful husband because I was being a stupid cow not being satisfied with all the wonderful things and the wonderful husband I have and picked a fight with him tonight. Some of the things I said were justified but some of them weren't and I apologised for the not so good things. I think I get frustrated with the fact that I want to do so much with my life and things keep stopping me.

I think with my friend starting this business it has made me realise how much I want to do something with my life. It has made me realise more and more that I want to be a Life Coach and do something that I feel I would be good at and the only thing stopping me is money. A guy friend of mine said..."if you want it bad enough and if it is right you will make it happen"... he is right! So even though the government said that they wouldn't give a loan for this subject I went online and applied for a student loan to see if the ruling had gone through yet... hey no harm in trying aye... and it isn't like I am not going to pay it back. OMG I have paid my taxes and I have never never been on the dole and I have worked my backside off all my life I feel that I am entitled to have some breaks in this world...so we shall see what happens and if I get the loan aye.

I am also enrolling in a night course where a life coach helps you work out your personal goals, work goals, financial goals etc and what you want to achieve in life with hubby.. It is a 4 week course and I think we would benefit and I suppose doing some research on what a life coach does and is like would be good experience for me as well aye.

I have my PT session with Joy tomorrow and I am looking forward to it. I am not looking forward to seeing bloody Kris there though... she doesn't work... you would think she would fuck off and have her sessions at different times to me as I don't want to see her bloody face but no she makes them at the same time so I have to see her. Mind you I work harder cause she is there and I am not going to let her think just because she is skinnier she is fitter than me....

Went to the gym on Wednesday night and did the kickboxing class and walk to the class and did the class and walked home and at the class Joy was impressed with me doing the full on star jumps and running on the stop where as I used to do the lower impact one since starting... I must admit the reason I didn't do the high impact stuff is because I had my chest bumping up and down and my tummy too and it still creeps me out. Hubby said we can go out this weekend and find a bra that I can wear that will be more supportive but sports bra's don't come in my size... not that I have ever seen so where do I go to find one that doesn't have a bloody bone in it grrr.
Ok I am rambling on tonight.

Might leave it at that.

I suppose since I am rambling on it must mean that I am getting to be more comfortable in my new blog talking about things.

Can't say I have been very good this week with food... I have to get back in the swing. But that is ok.. I am going to lose this weight even if it takes me five years. What have I got to rush about? Nothing!!! As long as I don't gain it back and keep going down then life is good.

Love Chubbymum

Comments

Chris H wrote:
Feb 1, 2007 at 9:47 PM
Be honest with your friend and tell her that although you do love the necklace you simply can't afford it.... don't beat yourself up about it, if she's really your friend she won't be upset or try to push you into buying it. Looking after 6 kids, yep did that all day every day with my own... and yep, I had a constant headache ! lol As for seeing Kris the Bitch when you are at the gym, why not change your times so you don't end up there when she is? I know it's kinda like running away from her, but do you really need the aggrivation of seeing her ugly mutt ? I'd find it off putting!

Rachel's World wrote:
Feb 2, 2007 at 10:23 AM
Yep I agree with everything Chis_H said.

Hope your all better now sweets, I have been checking in everyday to see if you have left a post, scored today....LOL
I am also addicted to The Biggest Loser and apparently there is a new one starting in Australia (last night) so I don't know how long we have to wait to get it here but I hope not too long. God I wish they had one in NZ, I would SOOOOO apply for it.

Not much to say

Jan 17, 2007 at 8:30 PM

I haven't got much to say but feel like I have to do a post or I will get lazy he he he

I felt more confident today because of my loss last night. 800 grams for me is fantastic.

Went to the gym tonight to my first Kick boxing class with Joy my personal trainer and I worked my butt off. Before I went I had decided that I was going to try things I haven't done before or moves that I have done the easy option to... so tonight I did the jogging instead of the walking fast on the spot and I did full star jumps FULL STAR JUMPS OMG instead of the one step sideways.

I made sure all the hand work was done at the same time and I pushed hard and didn't give in. I sometimes feel like I don't go that extra little mile... I get to the point where I am hurting and then I don't go that extra mile and push through it and after watching The Biggest Loser in the last couple of weeks I have been thinking about the program and then I go through that barrier.
I have not ever wanted it so bad as I have in the last couple of weeks.

I have 22.8 kilos to get under 100 kilos CAN YOU BELIEVE IT???? only 22.8 kilos... not 54.7 kilos like the start of my journey.

Sue... thanks for the offer I appreciate it and I will use it to (you know what I mean)... thank you!
Work was ok today got a little annoyed with the Manager of the centre I have my office in... how useless is she!!

OMG I was sooo sick of covering her backside the last 6 months since she took over (when she had been jointly doing the job for the first 6 months) and she never gives credit where credit is due that I took some problems that she caused in her office today while her boss was there (didn't know she was but I was leaving for the day) and said "you need to sort these out because I am tired of fixing the problems when I have constantly been telling you guys how to do it" I know it was harsh but OMG there is so much you can take and not get credit for before you crack... and today it was me.

I worked full time last week instead of 20 hours a week to fix all the stuff ups that she caused over the holiday break that I think I got to breaking point.

OMG I got flack from Debbie today about not telling her how much I had lost last night.. she made such a big deal with her boss that her boss turned around and said "do you think maybe she lost way more than you had that maybe she didn't want to make you feel small" I just smiled and walked away... realistically she knows that wouldn't happen but why would she be so upset that I didn't tell her....?? don't quite get it... I didn't tell anyone at work when they asked too so that she didn't feel it was just her.

I felt better about it though... I felt like finally this journey was mine and now for all to see... I don't mind on here because of the support and we are all happy for all of our losses... but I feel quilty everytime I tell someone as the meeting how much I had lost because it is never a lot.... I don't want the quilt I want to feel proud of my accomplishments.

WHEW it feels good to just get it off my chest.... and talk talk talk... isn't this the way it is supposed to be? I feel like a journal is my way of getting it off my chest and working on it and not bottling it up inside.

OHHHH I am sore!! sore sore in my arms tonight after class.

Off tomorrow... got a PT with Joy and I am going to treat myself and get my nails done to feel good about myself.

I am going to my uncles funeral on Friday and I haven't seen most of the people that are coming in a couple of years as they live a long way away and hopefully someone will notice the difference in me... not that they are there for that but sometimes it is nice to talk about something else... It is bringing back a lot of upset moments for me at the moment and especially about my Dad. I so know what my cousin is going through at the moment and I hope to God that she has spent as much time with her Dad before he died because you can never get the time back.....

Anyway I have rambled on too much now.

Love Chubbymum

Comments

Rachel's World wrote:
Jan 18, 2007 at 2:48 PM
[this is good]Good on you for saying something at work, if you don't nobody else is going to ay?

Celtic Girl wrote:
Jan 18, 2007 at 2:56 PM
Congrats on your loss, yourve been working hard and you deserve it. Also a big Hug, I hate funerals to as they always bring back sad memories for me, try and remember the good times hun. Chin up

Hippygal wrote:
Jan 18, 2007 at 7:50 PM
Sorry to hear about your Uncle. But congrats on your loss :):).You will get there.Jaxx

Lee wrote:
Jan 18, 2007 at 9:45 PM
Sorry to hear of your loss.
You are doing so well:)
I have started reading Dr Phil 7 keys - what was the addy for the group you wrote to me about?

Anne wrote:
Jan 19, 2007 at 9:24 AM
Great loss - well done! You aer sounding so positive! Good on you for saying your thoughts at work. Had to be done/

fortysumthing wrote:
Jan 22, 2007 at 4:42 PM
[this is good]
Hey girl
You sound great. I finally caught up with your blog. I love it. You sound so happy and things are working out well . Will email you later. Take care. And happy new year!!!!

Rachel's World wrote:
Jan 23, 2007 at 11:17 AM
Hello in there...........is there anyone home?????????

Lee wrote:
Jan 24, 2007 at 11:44 AM
Just checking in to see how you are going!!

First Weigh In for Year

Jan 9, 2007 at 9:09 PM

My first weigh in for the year tonight.

I am pretty happy with it considering I set myself a limit of 2 kilo gain. I didn't want to gain but if I did then anything under 2 kilos is ok.

So I gained 1.7 kilos taking me to 123.5 OUCH but I am still over my 30 kilos lost so that is fanbloodytastic.

Debbie went with me tonight for her first night and she gained 3.3 kilos OMG she was pissed!! She knew she was going to gain but 3.3 just killed her.

To be quite honest she could loose that in a week or 3 where as if I gained that much it would take me months because I only lose an average of 500 grams a week.... so didn't feel too much sympathy for her tonight.. I know that sounds harsh but I get sooo frustrated when she can lose so much when we do exactly the same thing in exercise and food... and that is making me sound like a bitch!

I am not trying to sound like a bitch but I hate the way I really try and I get minimal and that isn't against Debbie at all as I adore her as my friend and love spending time with her just that I get frustrated as I try just as hard or even more and I can imagine you all have been in the same situation. It is so not against her as a person...it has taken me 2 years to lose 33 kilos and it took her 16 weeks to lose 15 kilos so I get a little frustrated even though she totally deserved to lose the weight!! TOTALLY.

Work today drove me insane and I worked from 7.30am to 5pm tonight as well as yesterday and I usually finish at 2.30 as idiots interferred with my job and now I am fixing the errors for about 400 children GOD that pisses me off! No communication just they decided to do something without consulting... I should make them sort out the problem but in the end they might stuff it up more than it is worth. I suppose I am getting overtime paid so hey!

I am getting SOOOOO much out of the Biggest Loser that is on everynight at the moment. It is motivating me like you wouldn't believe... wish things like that would be on more instead of all the crap on at the moment.

So my goal:::::::
By the end of February I want to be at 119 kilos!! I want to be out of the 120's FOREVER!!!!!!
So that is 3.6 in 7 weeks so that is 500 grams a week and if I lose more than 500 grams then that is a bonus.
I am going to do this!!
I am back to being FEISTY!!!

Good night everyone
LoveCM

Comments

Rachel's wrote:
Jan 10, 2007 at 9:07 AM
1.7kgs is under your 2kgs you gave yourself over Xmas so GOOD GIRL.........LOL

That certainly is 2 long days at work for the start of a new year, I tried to sneak off early to go to the gym on Monday and got snapped by the Director (the big boy) of the bloody company.............typical!!!!
Oh well, at least it was for a good cause....hahaha.

I am also loving the Biggest Loser, what a hoot. I have missed a couple unfortunately but Mum has already seen it in Oz, so she is filling me in. Don't ya just wish someone would come and take us away to do the same thing and then we could just get on with living a happy, normal life?
Isn't Bob a lot shittier in this series? I always thought he was Mr Nice Guy and Jillian was the bitch but Bob hasn't been his lovely self this time.

Janine wrote:
Jan 10, 2007 at 10:51 AM
[this is good]
Hey L,
Nice to read that you are motivated and going to kick butt this year. I always admre how much exercise you get in, youa re a gym machine.
Janine

Fat Queen wrote:
Jan 10, 2007 at 5:00 PM
Nothing wrong with being feisty! MOTIVATED is good :) Sorry your day at work was a hassle, but I guess that's why they CALL it work ;) Baby steps -- and NO comparing -- work at your OWN pace. Everyone's metabolism works differently...

Lee wrote:
Jan 11, 2007 at 1:45 AM
Is biggest loser on there already???...I can't wait till it starts here!!

Hippygal wrote:
Jan 11, 2007 at 8:01 AM
Very doable goals - I feel a bit guilty, because I am like Debbie, if I stick to the points properly and exercise 3-4 times a week, I can lose 1 kilo a week on average. I suppose I should count myself as lucky in that respect.

Chris H wrote:
Jan 11, 2007 at 10:46 AM
I know how you must be feeling about the slow loss, but remember, a loss is just that, A LOSS. I am sure you can get outta the 120's, so go for it. I have been thinking.... maybe in order to lose faster you need to try changing something in your routine... like change what you are eating, when you are eating it, have your main meal at lunchtime, don't eat a thing after say... 7pm, do a different exercise (our bodies get used to what we do all the time), try dropping the carbs a bit more, CHANGE AS MUCH AS YOU CAN.... and maybe that will help. It has for me and heaps of others.... good luck!

Celtic Girl wrote:
Jan 11, 2007 at 2:48 PM
You'll get to the teens, I know you will. You have the drive to accomplish anything you want to.

Don't wanna

Jan 7, 2007 at 9:27 PM

Don't wanna go back to work tomorrow!!

I am having too much fun being me and being home with my family and enjoying everything that we are doing!!! I don't want to go back into that little office and doing crap boring work. I want to get paid he he he but I don't want to get paid doing work I don't particularly like!!!

I know we all feel like that some or most of the time but I don't want to feel like that again! I hope that I can do this Life Coach course and that I can get myself in to a job that I am passionate about and want to do because so far in my life I haven't found anything that I am passionate about!!! and will being a Life Coach be something I am passionate about or will I be in the same situation I am in now?

How do we ever know what makes us happy? How do people do what makes them happy in a job!!???How do they work it out?

All I know is I don't want to live the rest of my life making challenges with my life that revolve around exercise and family but don't work out what really makes me happy in my work life!!
I have to find what will make me happy so that all my life is happy and contented.

I stay in my jobs for security and really they aren't making me happy and you only have one life to live.
CM
Comments

Lee wrote:
Jan 7, 2007 at 11:54 PM
I know how you feel...not looking forward to going back to work myself...lol
Life coaching sounds like fun...you can use me as a gueina pig anytime:)

Fat Queen wrote:
Jan 8, 2007 at 9:33 AM
Life is a Journey as much as losing weight or being healthy. Besides -- there's so much to learn and DO how could we pick just ONE? No one says we HAVE to either -- if it makes you happy -- DO IT!
My Dad got his HS Diploma [equivalent] when he was 64. His philosphy was: Never Stop Learning!

Rachel's World wrote:
Jan 8, 2007 at 10:06 AM
Hi matey, I am also back at work today and can finally make comments on blogs as my home PC is terrible and I haven't had the time to catch up with everyone.

I went and read your January posts and you are sounding so motivated and positive and your family days out sound fantastic. You are going to have such an awesome 2007,,,,,,,,,I just know it!!!!!

Celtic Girl wrote:
Jan 8, 2007 at 4:09 PM
I know how you feel. I also hate my job and feel trapped.I agree with Fat Queen, your never to old to stop learning. I'd love to go back to uni and do something I enjoyed. Life can be so challenging sometimes, but it also helps to look at the positives and be thankful for what we have.

Private - Comments and feeling down

I have lost motivation in the last 2 days.

I have eaten whatever I liked and felt like crap!! I have done the wrong thing and my weight loss is going to suffer on Tuesday and everytime I look at Debbie I can see the weight falling off her!! It bloody sucks is all I can say and it is making me feel even more down in the dumps.

I know it is my fault and not hers because I have to sort it out in my own head

Breakfast
Berry Smoothie

Morning Tea
Vege chips (3.5 points)

Lunch
1 roll
Left over casserole
Ginger Crunch (OMG I shouldn't have eaten this).

I have had two bottles of water though.. but that isn't a consolation.

I miss posting... but I am scared to post because things are getting back to Daniel and others and I am not sure who the culprit is and I am not happy about it.

I went to the gym yesterday and Hubby and I met Debbie there but I wasn't in to it and I hated it to tell the truth... I didn't want to anything.. I don't want to go tonight and feel the same way. I want to go and work my arse off and stop being negative. I know what Crusher means when I start getting negative it is a bad thing for me... it hinders me and I don't want it to.

At weight watchers I weigh 123.8 and I have to get under the 120's.. OMG what is stopping me I know I can do this and in the last couple of weeks I have proven it but I tend to do really well one week and then the next I think hmmm I am doing well lets cheat a little. But then when I am too strict I can't seem to lose the weight either.

I am making myself soooo upset over this bloody piece of ginger crunch and I want to talk to someone about it but then I don't want to tell anyone that I brought it and then sat in the car where no one could see me to eat it.. how desparate and strange is that?

I have so many comments saying that I should confront Daniel about all this but I don't want!! I shouldn't have to explain myself... I don't honestly care what he thinks. I have not said anything that would have hurt him I feel. I have said I didn't want him as a trainer and he wasn't right for me but that is it and if he is going to listen to Kris about this then he is a fool and that is the end of that subject.

Now on to this business... What am I to do? I am being lazy and not going fast on buying this franchise business because of being scared... OMG I can do this!! What is stopping me. It is a good business and money is coming in so why am I scared... maybe because my mum always makes me feel like I should never take risks so I don't and I have had that drummed in to my head since I was little so any challenge is making me more and more doubt myself. I did that with my jobs too... I always stuffed up and I always did as little as possible in my job and so that stuffed things up for me. I sucked in Advance investments... I couldn't get anything right. I was a bad employee in Payments and Fraser knew that and deep down I knew it too. I just wanted the money but didn't give a damn about the job.

Why do I do it I don't know! I don't want to be a stuff up... and I want to succeed but using my families money to do this business and then not doing it right that I loose the business then I am going to have my family know that I am a screw up.

Positive Positive is what people keep on saying to me... obviously I don't come across as a positive person so I have to work on that. How do I become more positive?

I am being more honest now that I am not writing to everyone out there and writing in here to myself... and to be quite honest I don't know if I want to go back to public writing because then I get all the trouble happening again.

What to do? What to do?

Chubbymum

Auckland Meeting with Work

Firstly Woohoooo KAREN congrads on the beautiful wee daughter born today!!! How wonderful!! You will both make such wonderful parents.

Went to Lean this morning and in a way was feeling rushed as I had to leave by 7.15 to get up to Auckland for my meeting with my boss (which by the way I have never met in person) and I have been with this new company 1 year (when they took over our creche).

It was a good workout at Lean today but I seriously think I need a break... I felt like I held people back today. Because the running is not good on my knees in the morning (maybe it is the cold) that when the others were told to run around the shops I walked and so my partner (whoever it was when I got back) missed out because I was late getting back and the others were doing other things. OMG do I hate that it reminds me of being back at school again and I avoided sports and the gym sessions with a note as a kids because I hated hindering other people.... I am feeling it more and more and more and it is getting me down.

I am soooo much better than I used to be last year with my exercise and I know this but I don't like feeling like I am letting people down and I know people will say you aren't letting them down but to me I am letting them down... they are supposed to be doing things to their best ability but with me holding them back is reminding me of school.

In a way realising this is such a big step for me as it is making me realise that the reason I didn't do exercise stemmed from my school days when I was told to do the exercise that I didn't like.... and forced to do it and I think that is why I hated exercise so much.

I had to be up in Auckland by 9am and I ended up leaving at 7.15 which really wasn't enough time with the horrible traffic jams that I came across. I don't know why I wasn't suprised I worked in Auckland for 5 years what was the suprise. I got in to Auckland at 9.15 grrr so I ended up being late. I think I should have not gone to Lean this morning but I am glad I did the exercise anyway.

But they didn't seem to mind. New Market hasn't changed since I worked there that is for sure... still expensive and stuffy he he he but hey that is New Market. The offices there weren't as big as I thought and I thought there would be a couple of office etc but the floor was quite tiny.. it was great to meet some of the people that I had spoken to over the phone over the year.

I was proud of myself at morning tea... my boss brought morning tea and was unpacking them from the food town bag and I was looking at it thinking OMMMMMGGGGG what the hell am I going to do? This is the food:

Mellowpuffs
Lolli bags
Chips
Biscuits
Hummus
Rice crackers

So you can guess I was happy about the rice crackers and hummus but they stuck them at the other end of the table... my boss said "have something" I said in a quiet voice "thank you for this it is great but I have lost 30 kilos and really I can't have this" I could see their looks as if to say OMG you are a big girl and you lost 30 kilos how bloody big were ya he he he in a nice way of course.

I enjoyed meeting all the girls especially one lady and we went out a couple of times downstairs so she could have a smoke to get away from another lady there that I wanted to rip her tongue out by morning tea.. she was the rudest lady I have ever met and wouldn't let anyone say a full sentence without butting in... both me and this other lady were getting quite annoyed.

I learnt so much about my job today... I have been there a year with this one company and hadn't been shown how to use the system I have been tutuing with it and that is how I learnt. It was great. Well our big CEO has said that he wants us to meet once a month OMG that is fine but it is on my day's off so I have to have my days off stuffed up and I don't know if I was happy about that.

But they are thinking about having it in a different region each time... like Christchurch, Wellington, Rotorua, Auckland and of course Waikato so I suppose that isn't too bad and they pay for the travel and the working day.... but still it is my day off hmmmmm decisions.... now don't get me wrong it is great but I have to have someone to take and pick up the kids as I can't do it and hubby did it today but if it was a regular thing I am not sure how his boss will react to it being every month.

I chose sushi for lunch woohooo for me. I also had my weetbix before going to the gym this morning at 5.30am instead of getting a ham bun from the bakery on the way to auckland so that is another thing to chalk up he he he

Hubby made Beef Strognoff (weight watcher recipe) tonight with dinner with veges too and so I think I have been fab!!! with my food. I will lose this week! I don't want my record of no gaining in 5 weeks to stop... I have 4 losses and 1 stay the same and this week coming has to be a loss... it has to.

I thought that everyday I would put a question down and try to answer it. I copied these questions from somewhere a while ago and can't remember where so here goes:

List 10 reasons why you want to lose weight. Which one is the most compelling and why?

1. To be described as "The skinny one" not "The fat one"
2. To weigh less than my husband!!!
3. To go into any shop and buy clothes
4. To live my life to the fullest
5. Stop hiding behind my size and to do things for me and not for others
6. To be able to eat in public and not worry what others think
7. To be normal
8. Have the energy to do anything and stop making excuses
9. To take my vows again but this time not in a fat dress but an amazing one.
10. To go and play a game with the kids and feel like I should be there.

I think the one out of the ten that makes me want to keep with it a toss up between number 1 and number 4 but really number 4 comes up the best. I want to live life to the fullest... I want to be happy and content and not to focuss on the weight but focuss on my life and doing what I want to do with my family and not be afraid of what others are thinking about my weight.

Hmmm might leave it at that.

Chubbymum

Motivation

I am feeling so motivated today.... I am feeling motivated because finally I feel like I am being true to myself and saying everything that is on my mind in my blog!!!

I feel motivated because I met some wonderful people down in Wellington that know exactly what I am going through and are an amazing motivation for me to keep going.

Rachel thank you for the emails today and for listening I really appreciated it and it has made me think of things in a different way you are truly an amazing and funny lady. I don't have enough laughs in my day and I can imagine that if you lived here I would have such a great six pack (if girls have them he he he) because of all the laughing we would do.

I found this on an email sent to me today and thought I would put it up for everyone to read.... it is so simple but sometimes we forget to put ourselves first:

Put Yourself First — you can't lose weight for someone else; you have to own your goals. After all, you're the one out there sweating your butt off, right? Finding the right motivation is all about getting real with yourself. Jillian Michaels

Sometimes I think that motivation is not all you need though... you need to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF because without that you won't achieve anything.

Ok so I treated today as my first day losing weight... because I have gone back to my bad habits since the holiday and I was liking the fact of not worrying about food... so today I started with getting back to drinking water. I had a glass of water with every meal...

Food today:

Breakfast
2 Sandwich bread
Peanut Butter (slither not much)

Morning Tea
Carrot Sticks
Wasabi Peas

Lunch
Left over Rogan Josh (not a lot)
Rice
Nectarine

Afternoon Tea
Yoghurt

Dinner
Roast Beef
Carrots
Beans
Silverbeat
Potatoes
(I am going to try and have one potatoe a week and that is it... sort of like an experiment)

I not happy with my food today but I wanted to concentrate on getting the water sorted today instead of being overly worried about the food but still being good.... so this is what my experiment will be today.

Went back to work after 16 days off and people actually missed me. I phoned one of my creches I do the accounts for and the Manager said "OMG thank God you are back... you don't know how much I missed ya" now I can tell you this lady scares the hell out of me because she is sooo straight to the point sort of person and she was the last person that I would have thought that would have missed me....

But I was in the newspaper with my photo today and I was sooo sooo sooo proud he he he. My mother in law even phoned to say she saw me as well. Woohoooo ME!

I also got a phone call and this lady on the other end said "I hear you are our accounts person" and I said "who are you?" and they said "### creche in Morrinsville" I said sorry but I don't know what you are on about and she said that my boss in Auckland knows all about it and sure enough I phoned Auckland and was told there that I have a new creche OMG OMG it was nice to find out through someone else that I had a creche that had started about a week ago with us. I was told that it could be happening but didn't think it would be till start of next year OMG what a Mickey Mouse bunch I work for... how could they take on another creche without giving me the heads up or the details... and all my boss could say was "OOps forgot to tell you about that" OMG I know I don't work in the same city but fFSake.... yep yep Mickey Mouse outfit.. so my day started off interestingly.

I haven't heard from Kris at all today. Saw her dropping off her kids this morning in the rain and waved to her but she didn't even wave back and looked miserable...I can't say I wasn't being friendly, as I am an adult and I don't like losing friends. Even though I don't want to be close friends anymore with her I don't want to totally avoid her either as our kids go to the same school and we both go to the same gym.

I am getting quite tired now and I have to go to the gym at 6am in the morning ARGGHHHHH back to getting up early again ;-)

Love ya all
CM