Auckland Meeting with Work

Firstly Woohoooo KAREN congrads on the beautiful wee daughter born today!!! How wonderful!! You will both make such wonderful parents.

Went to Lean this morning and in a way was feeling rushed as I had to leave by 7.15 to get up to Auckland for my meeting with my boss (which by the way I have never met in person) and I have been with this new company 1 year (when they took over our creche).

It was a good workout at Lean today but I seriously think I need a break... I felt like I held people back today. Because the running is not good on my knees in the morning (maybe it is the cold) that when the others were told to run around the shops I walked and so my partner (whoever it was when I got back) missed out because I was late getting back and the others were doing other things. OMG do I hate that it reminds me of being back at school again and I avoided sports and the gym sessions with a note as a kids because I hated hindering other people.... I am feeling it more and more and more and it is getting me down.

I am soooo much better than I used to be last year with my exercise and I know this but I don't like feeling like I am letting people down and I know people will say you aren't letting them down but to me I am letting them down... they are supposed to be doing things to their best ability but with me holding them back is reminding me of school.

In a way realising this is such a big step for me as it is making me realise that the reason I didn't do exercise stemmed from my school days when I was told to do the exercise that I didn't like.... and forced to do it and I think that is why I hated exercise so much.

I had to be up in Auckland by 9am and I ended up leaving at 7.15 which really wasn't enough time with the horrible traffic jams that I came across. I don't know why I wasn't suprised I worked in Auckland for 5 years what was the suprise. I got in to Auckland at 9.15 grrr so I ended up being late. I think I should have not gone to Lean this morning but I am glad I did the exercise anyway.

But they didn't seem to mind. New Market hasn't changed since I worked there that is for sure... still expensive and stuffy he he he but hey that is New Market. The offices there weren't as big as I thought and I thought there would be a couple of office etc but the floor was quite tiny.. it was great to meet some of the people that I had spoken to over the phone over the year.

I was proud of myself at morning tea... my boss brought morning tea and was unpacking them from the food town bag and I was looking at it thinking OMMMMMGGGGG what the hell am I going to do? This is the food:

Mellowpuffs
Lolli bags
Chips
Biscuits
Hummus
Rice crackers

So you can guess I was happy about the rice crackers and hummus but they stuck them at the other end of the table... my boss said "have something" I said in a quiet voice "thank you for this it is great but I have lost 30 kilos and really I can't have this" I could see their looks as if to say OMG you are a big girl and you lost 30 kilos how bloody big were ya he he he in a nice way of course.

I enjoyed meeting all the girls especially one lady and we went out a couple of times downstairs so she could have a smoke to get away from another lady there that I wanted to rip her tongue out by morning tea.. she was the rudest lady I have ever met and wouldn't let anyone say a full sentence without butting in... both me and this other lady were getting quite annoyed.

I learnt so much about my job today... I have been there a year with this one company and hadn't been shown how to use the system I have been tutuing with it and that is how I learnt. It was great. Well our big CEO has said that he wants us to meet once a month OMG that is fine but it is on my day's off so I have to have my days off stuffed up and I don't know if I was happy about that.

But they are thinking about having it in a different region each time... like Christchurch, Wellington, Rotorua, Auckland and of course Waikato so I suppose that isn't too bad and they pay for the travel and the working day.... but still it is my day off hmmmmm decisions.... now don't get me wrong it is great but I have to have someone to take and pick up the kids as I can't do it and hubby did it today but if it was a regular thing I am not sure how his boss will react to it being every month.

I chose sushi for lunch woohooo for me. I also had my weetbix before going to the gym this morning at 5.30am instead of getting a ham bun from the bakery on the way to auckland so that is another thing to chalk up he he he

Hubby made Beef Strognoff (weight watcher recipe) tonight with dinner with veges too and so I think I have been fab!!! with my food. I will lose this week! I don't want my record of no gaining in 5 weeks to stop... I have 4 losses and 1 stay the same and this week coming has to be a loss... it has to.

I thought that everyday I would put a question down and try to answer it. I copied these questions from somewhere a while ago and can't remember where so here goes:

List 10 reasons why you want to lose weight. Which one is the most compelling and why?

1. To be described as "The skinny one" not "The fat one"
2. To weigh less than my husband!!!
3. To go into any shop and buy clothes
4. To live my life to the fullest
5. Stop hiding behind my size and to do things for me and not for others
6. To be able to eat in public and not worry what others think
7. To be normal
8. Have the energy to do anything and stop making excuses
9. To take my vows again but this time not in a fat dress but an amazing one.
10. To go and play a game with the kids and feel like I should be there.

I think the one out of the ten that makes me want to keep with it a toss up between number 1 and number 4 but really number 4 comes up the best. I want to live life to the fullest... I want to be happy and content and not to focuss on the weight but focuss on my life and doing what I want to do with my family and not be afraid of what others are thinking about my weight.

Hmmm might leave it at that.

Chubbymum

Hospital

Ok so the weekend was fantastic...

Can't say the last 2 days has been after that.

My mum was admitted to hosptial Monday.

Before I went away on the Friday I begged my mum to go to the doctors for her thumb that was sore.. she is afraid of doctors AFRAID AFRAID of doctors and so to get her in to check out her thumb is a nightmare. She said no she wasn't going to go as it was getting better. No it wasn't getting better it was getting worse. When I rang home in the weekend I asked her if she was ok and she kept saying yes her and the boys are good. Got home on Sunday night and her thumb was twice (maybe three) times the size. She kept saying it was better than it was.

By Monday I was worried and said to her that she has an appointment at the doctors at 5.00... so we got her there and the doctor said "you have to go to the hospital" Well..... my mother freaked out and got all upset and I didn't know what to do.... (the reason my mum doesn't like doctors is that my dad went to hospital with bronchitis and died of pneumonia so I can understand hospitals aren't her best friend). Got up to the hospital at 5.30 and we didn't get seen by a doctor till 7.30pm and then she had to go into the surgery to get the top of her thumb lanced (they said she was lucky she came in because if not she could have lost her thumb) The put 3 local needles in her thumb OMG I felt the pain myself as she was holding my hand with her other hand while they did it.

Because of the infection she had to be admitted in to hospital so she was there last night and all day today and they want her over night again. It looks a lot better but I am not convinced the doctors think that tomorrow would be the day she comes home.

I haven't had much sleep worrying about her up there as she doesn't like being in unfamiliar places. I know she is in the best place but I hate leaving her like that.

Anyway I am tired and so I am going to do some of my work (that hubby picked up for me) so that tomorrow isn't a total nightmare at work.

Good night everyone
Love CM

Birthday Quad Bikes in Taupo

Wow What A Weekend it turned out to be!

Friday

Left home at 4.15 and got to Taupo at 6pm.. We went to the motel and it was lovely!!! Then hubby took me to a lovely Italian restaurant where there was a roaring fire and Italian music and the atmosphere was fantastic. I felt soooo relaxed and we had a great time that is for sure.

Kris and Tony met us at the restaurant and then we went to the wholesalers and got some alcohol and went back to the Motel to talk and have a couple of drinks.. it was sooo funny and we had a great time. It was relaxing to be able to talk with friends without telling kids to go to bed or stop shouting or don't do this and that. I really enjoyed the night. Thought I would put these too photos of what we looked like after our drinking he he he. Kris fell off the bed... she doesn't hold her drinks that well he he he he but we had a great time.

Didn't have a wonderful sleep at all because the bed was too soft but I was looking forward to sleeping in but my body just wouldn't let me do that.. it is accustomed to waking up early now with kids ho hum.

So it was soooo good to have my birthday... hubby ordered breakfast and I had breakfast in bed hmmmmmmm... After relaxing and had a lovely shower and sat in bed reading for a bit Kris and her hubby came down and into town we went. We did lots of shopping and hubby said I could buy a couple of things so I brought myself some cd's and I brought 3 new tops. It felt absolutly wonderful to get into some tops and not fear if I will or not... he he he poor Kris must of gotten sick of me saying Kris come and look at this top he he he.

We went to lunch at Breakers but I just couldn't eat it all. Had a chicken roll with salad but with hot chips and I had a couple then left the rest as it wasn't worth me feeling bloated all day for it.

Kris and Tony brought me the book I have been wanting for so long called Why French Women don't get fat... sooo cool.. just started reading it but I am enjoying it that is for sure.

Went back to the Motel to meet Delwyn and Heather and got spoilt once again. I didn't expect to get any presents because they were all coming down to go Quad biking with me. Delwyn brought me a white pasta bowl and plates that match my dinner set and they were beautiful. Heather brought me a book called "Eight Steps to Getting the most out of life Now (no opportunity wasted) by Phil Keoghan" and I can't wait to read that as well.

Crusher and her hubby Tony met us around 2pm and we all went together to the Quad bikes OMG OMG OMG OMG it was sooooo exciting apart from when we were getting talked to by the guide he kept on saying the practice track (which was looking rather scary behind us, but found out later it wasn't the practice track he was talking about)... it was the weirdest feeling getting on these bikes.. my heart raced and I felt like I wasn't in control when we were going down the practice track but I was happy because I was conquering my fears I was living a little on the edge and combating my fear of heights and situations where I have no control.

The tracks were muddy and most of them weren't any wider than the bike and there was water everywhere as it was pouring down with rain. I got stuck twice. Once was going up a hill and I didn't go fast enough so the guide had to get out and push me out of the mud he he he and then the next time I had to go around a corner and one wheel tipped and the bike stopped sideways OMG it was tooooo funny I was shitting myself he he he. We went on top of this huge mountain and it was really foggy but it was sooo high up my ears were popping. I didn't worry too much even though I have a HUGE fear of heights... I want to stop feeling scared like that.

We stopped at the top to have milo, coffee and biscuits and relax a little before going down again. Going down was scary as I kept slipping going down as the muddy was so squishy but it was exciting.

Got down to the bottom and found hubby stranded as his bike didn't want to start up so he jumped on the back and we rode about 10 minutes out of the bush... it was scary having someone on the back when you are going up a hill. I had to tell hubby to sit forward as it felt like the bike was going to go back... it was fantastic. During one part I went fast through some puddles and we bounced like trampolines he he he

Got back and I was pumping.... pumping... pumping.... it was the best birthday ever!!

Got back got showered and we all went out for dinner to a Korean/Japanese restaurant the food was amazing and realy fresh. It was a really great dinner we all laughed and ate and laughed and ate some more he he he.

After dinner we went to bed as we were all really tired and needed some sleep. Woke up this morning and had a spa bath and hubby painted my toe nails he he he.

Took a slow drive back today... we stopped at the Bee Hive shop and got some little treats for the kids and Delwyn, me and hubby wrote a postcard for each of the kids and stopped at Tirau to shop he he he and brought myself a new bag. OMG I am never usually allowed to buy this much ever as we really can't afford it but hey that is what a Visa is for he he he and had a lovely cuppa in a cafe and sat relaxed reading magazines. It was great to go have a coffee with a friend (hubby and Delwyn) and just be and read it was quite refreshing to just be and not talk talk talk. I think we were all just buggered.

Got home to a wonderful roast and Crusher came over to give me my food regime for the next week or so... it was simple and easy and not a day to day thing that was in too much detail which was fantastic.. I have three weeks to sort out my situation and get myself to this 30 kilos.

I had a fantastic weekend and don't wanna go to work tomorrow...

If I think of any more to tell I will update later.

Love ya all
Chubbymum