Thoughtful Friday

Took boys to school and then went to the gym... admittingly I didn't want to go this morning... I had done my neck in in Auckland and looking to the right was painful. I must have an ear infection too... I know I sound like a hypochondriac but I'm not really.. just looking one way in the meeting in Auckland I think really did it for my neck.

Weighed in with Crusher and I stayed the same.. I know that Crusher wasn't too happy because her husband and neice are doing it and are losing.... I talked to hubby about that and really their metabolism is different. I tried really hard to stick to it last week. I am sure that Crusher doesn't believe me. I hated having wraps every single day and muesli for breakfast every day but I did stick to it and I didn't have any bad foods.

I said to Crusher that I was bored and to be quite honest that if I had to stick to having wraps for 6 weeks I would go insane. She didn't seem to happy and said to me "If I stuck to it... it would work" and maybe it would but the reason I have never stuck to a diet before Weight Watchers is because it was always soooo restrictive and I rebel against it. But with the points system I managed to lose 20 or so kilos without it feeling like I was going to explode.

We managed to have a chat about it all and decided that I would take the last three food plans she has given me and mix it up to make up the food I can eat for the challenge and to be quite honest that was fine with me... it isn't the same food every day so I won't get bored but I know that it will work. I am still having wraps but not every day. I quite like the wraps but not every day I like a little bit of difference in what I eat or I just go the wrong way.

Crusher worked me sooo hard this morning. I was on the treadmill for 20 minutes and three of those minutes I ran.. but she wanted me to not hold on and for some reason today I just couldn't I felt like I was going sideways... and so the running felt like that as well. I am not too sure if it was my neck giving me a problem or if my ear infection hasn't fully gotten better.

I was pushed to the limit on the treadmill that was for sure and it was good... I was sweating like a pig. Then I got on the water bike and did 10 minutes on the water bike and then 5 minutes on the water bike with arms... it was great and Crusher was a trooper!!! Thanks Crusher.

She did have a word with me about being positive with the weight loss and I will lose the weight. I do understand that but last week I was really positive and I tried soooo hard to stick to the meal plan from crusher and I did so much walking and gym that I thought I would have lost something and not just stay the same.. but as I pointed out to Crusher I haven't gained in 5 weigh ins and that is a positive thing. Crusher did mention that if I stuck to the plan for 6 weeks I would loose my 10 kilos before the end of the year. Maybe I would but I don't think I would be any happier by the end of it even if I did lose the 10 kilos... and there if I read it back is another point for Crusher because I wasn't being positive when saying it.

Debbie and I went for a walk/jog tonight... it was great and we were laughing the whole way around. It wasn't dark outside and if you know me you know running where people can see me is just NOT what I would do. But we did on the main main road and had people looking at us but I didn't seem to care. I was wearing jeans that were not very good as they kept falling down he he he so I kept holding them while I was running.

We had one truck driver go past and put up his thumb to say woohooo you two well done for running... and that made me feel really good. We did one street which is about a kilometre and then the rest we walked as my knee was hurting and her ankle was giving her trouble OMG talk about injury's he he he but we were still out there no matter what.

We got back and worked on what we were going to put on our T Shirts for tomorrow's Round the Bridges (6.3 km's). So we had bright orange T Shirts and on the front we put our name and on the back a picture of both of us smiling at each other and.....

The saying underneath was:
Two Chicky Babes
Turning the frown upside down
Pound the ground
Around the town bridges

Then on our backside we have:
"We really don't think we need buns of steel.
We'd be happy with buns of cinnamon."

It was fun doing it so tomorrow at least we won't loose each other with all the people going to be going on the walk/run.

Anyway what a late night that was and went to bed straight away... I have to start going to bed on time as it is not helping me what soever.

Byeeee
Chubbymum

Weigh In last night

I felt so great at work today... I couldn't stop smiling and I am feeling so much healthier with my food and with my exercise and I have really really tried in the last couple of weeks after getting back from Wellington.

Went to weigh in tonight and I stayed the same and it really bothered me because I HAD made good choices and I HAD been really good with the exercise and I suppose I can't complain because in the last 5 weigh in's I have not gained not one bit.... I have lost and once stayed the same but not gained.

I even drank all my water and more every single day... I MEAN EVERY SINGLE DAY because I wanted so bad to loose this week. I had 900grams to get to my 5th stone.

I got a little upset at the meeting in front of my WW leader but at that point I was wondering what was the point... I mean I am doing this to lose this bloody weight and when I try really hard and stick to my points and my sugar points and my exercise and I stay the same it just hurts that I concentrated on it sooo hard and nothing!!!

I felt like a little baby but I have paid sooo much money going to Weight Watchers and the gym and I would like to see results... It is my spending money I spend on this and I don't get to buy or do much else because of it and for it to not work feels like I am wasting my money and I could do the same thing without spending the money.. I know that with my health that money isn't everything but I am not happy about spending money for nothing as I work damn hard for it.

I have to start doing this for me and eating what I want... I have been on this challenge with Crusher and it was my first week and I know she is going to tell me to stick to it but to be honest I am hating it!! I have the same breakfast and lunch most days and it is driving me insane.

I am going to go back to the plan she gave me before I went away to Wellington as the two weeks preceeding that plan I lost 1.1 and 1.2 kilos... so it was good for me and I didn't feel like it was restrictive.

Hubby was saying that when I know for sure I can't have something and when it is the same old same for days on end that I end up going the wrong way because I am hating thinking about food.

It shouldn't be this hard... how do others do it?

I was soooo angry that after dinner hubby and I went for a walk and it is a 3.3 km walk and every second light I ran... I am paying for it today as my knee has flared up again.

Went to LEAN this morning and once again felt like it was all out of my depth where everyone was improving and I was stuck at the back. I am going to be going until the triathlon and then I think I am going to give it up.... I hate this feeling and I am hating being outside all the time. I quite enjoyed our old lean with our old team and doing things inside and outside and now it isn't as much fun, I miss the laughing and the friendship.

I miss the challenges on the treadmill and the rower and the bikes and doing weights as well... it was more interesting but now it feels like walking and running all the time and I can't run or I pay for it the next day and to be realistic the reason my knee isn't getting any better is because everytime it starts feeling good I over do it again and it can't quite fully get better...

What do I do? I need some input on what people think?

Breakfast
Weetbix
Pineapple (Fresh)

Snack
Yoghurt
Pineapple

Lunch
Roll
Ham
Coleslaw

Addicted to blogs

OMG in the past week I feel like I am addicted to reading everyone's blogs because I need need need lots and lots of motivation to keep me going. I want to keep this feeling! I want to keep feeling so great.

Went to the gym with Debbie again this morning and we worked out little butts off.

Did 10 minutes on the bike and then did 2000 metres on the rower and it took me 10 minutes and 16 seconds... OMG I shaved off almost a minute from what I was doing last week.... what a high.

We went on the treadmill next and Debbie and I did 1 minute off and 1 minute on of jogging and walking... and yes Helena I did wish that it would hurry up at the end of the minute he he he... I am enjoying the fact that I can do it and that I am sweating like a pig as my t-shirt was wet when I got off. I had a little niggle in my knee so I have to watch it and make sure that I watch how I am running on the treadmill but I was doing it and the best thing was an old work mate of mine was on the treadmill next to me and she is like half my size and she was walking on the treadmill. I felt on a high high high.

We went down to the woman's gym after this and went into the sauna and sat there for about 10 minutes and then went and did the circuit on the woman's gym equipment.

This jogging thing is just amazing.... I would not have thought I could do that!!! I would not have thought it would happen until I was under the 100 kilo mark that is for sure.

I am sooo psyched about this weeks weigh in as I have been working my butt off this week. 24.2 kilos to get under 100 kilos and it is going to happen!! it is!!!

I have actually had all my water for each day this week too (THANKS to my WW leaders) I have tried so hard to make sure that those 3 litres have gone down my gob he he he. It is the hardest thing ever ever ever for me!! I just hate water but I want this weight to fall off me like it did when I started when I have lots of motivation and great people around me helping me loose this weight. Mojo was fantastic then!!! I want the Mojo from then back.

I have been tracking like a trooper too and I have been trying to stick to Crusher's food challenge... some days it has been a little hard because it is sooo repetitive and for six weeks hmmm not sure how it is going to be but you try having wraps every single day for lunch... what is inside them can be different but wraps for lunch everyday is B.O.R.I.N.G ARRGHHHH going crazy... especially trying to make them taste different so I don't get upset and eat the wrong thing.

I must admit the two weeks that I lost the 1.1 and the 1.2 were the weeks that I was doing Crushers other meal plan for me and it was fantastic. But they were interesting and I had two or three choices for the lunches so I didn't go stir crazy. I will do it till the end of this week but after that if I am feeling like I am going to stray I am going to talk to her to give me another option for lunch!

Today's wrap was lamb strips, carrots, lettuce, jalepeno hummus (little smear), mushrooms, falafel (homemade and little). It was devine!! it was different and a little bit of points there but it was at least better than chicken in it all the time or just plain salad.

After the gym we went in to town to look at vacuum cleaners for mum for christmas as she has hinted sooo much about them but didn't find one that we liked or one that we thought she might like so we will keep looking. But we went to K-Mart to look at the toy section with the boys to get their christmas presents sort of sorted... anyway we were in there and the boys went nuts over these skate boards... so while I was entertaining them hubby told them that he was going to the loo and then went and brought them and put them in the back of the car for them he he he so at least the big presents are now done for them and we just need to get little things for them. We did get a couple of things in Wellington while we were there.

Only the brother in law, father in law and step mother in law to go not bad really... We still have my mum but we know what she wants just have to find the right one... so that is pretty much sorted.

Hubby and I don't usually get presents for each other... I said the only thing I want is to go camping.. To be quite honest I would love it if he organised a camping trip with another family and friends to go with us... but I know my hubby and I am sure some of you know him by now too he just doesn't think out of the square and would NEVER do that unless I organised it and then what is the point he he he. So that is the only thing I want for Xmas..

The rest of the day was basically cleaning around the house... ho hum.... but it is something that all of us have to do.

I did play knuckle bones with the kids and trying to teach them how to play the game.. OMG it brought back so many memories playing the game with them... Corbin got upset because he couldn't catch them on the back of his hand and I had to keep telling him that he will get it... but it will take practice hmmm the patience of... nothing he he.

Anyway guys.. sooo tired and going to organise dinner.

Love ya all
Chubbymum

Saturday practice for round the bridges

OMG

Got up had my god awful muesli (he he he just because after five days of the same food I am hating muesli now) and then took the boys into the library to choose some books. I love the library with the kids now as they can sit still and read and be good little angels where as about a year ago I could have strangled Quinn he he he he. I was sooo proud of them today just sitting there with their books and reading (well Quinny was looking at pictures but that is a form of reading) and Corbin is reading like 9 year old books (he is only 7)... they were little darlings.

I feel so peaceful in a library like there can be hardly any noise and people have to be quieter than they normally would be. It is so nice and it is like being in a candy store and you have to choose only a couple of things and don't hog at them all he he he.

Debbie texts me to say she had cut her hair and coloured it. I said to her take a picture and send it to me as she was soooooo excited about what it looked like. But she tried and she couldn't he he he so we met at my place and got to see the hair cut and colour and it looked fantastic.

What a change it was!! especially when I usually only see it up and since she cut it so it was just above her shoulders and the colour was a like a light light red with blond highlights it really suited her. We both commented how it was quite similar to mine... and I said "now we can say we are sisters and others won't know he he he he" as we are like only 2 kilos different from each other.

I would like to have my hair the same length as hers.... I used to have blond hair to the middle of my back when I first met hubby and married him and the day after we got married I chopped it off for a change he he he.. I would like to have it a little longer but hey that will be a while yet. I want to have more of a neck and shoulders to show it off with he he he he

Anyway so we took my hubby's car and went in to town where the race will start next weekend and we didn't stop chatting the whole way and it was both of us talking... we were like half way around the walk and I said to her Wow we have gone such a long way and I wouldn't have guessed it... it was amazing and I really enjoyed her company and we walked a similar speed (even though I was quite sore from the run on the treadmill yesterday he he GEE thanks Crusher).

It took us about an hour and a half to get around the walk and I don't think that is too bad for 6.3 km walk. The lake when I walk around here in Hamilton (3.8 kilometres by the council) takes around 50 minutes so we did the 6.3 in quite good time. I was really pleased....

I got to know Debbie so much more too and we talked about things like our Dad's dying etc and it got quite emotional but I think it was good that we finally could talk to someone else that understood.

We came back home and hubby made us chicken wraps with jalapeno hummus, lettuce, carrot, pickles, it was soo yummy.

After that we played PlayStation the star wars Lego one it was sooo cool... I felt like a kid again and Corbin was teaching Debbie how to use the controls and she was loving the killing of the robots he he he she was sooo funny.

We then sang sing star and we are like 20 points difference from each other... it was like we were sisters.. we like quite a lot of things the same. The other night when she came back for dinner we found out that we both love love love love love love (do you get the feeling that we love) pepper and garlic on things and lots of it... soooo funny. I have never met a person that likes it that much (especially pepper).

Unfortunately she had to rush off because she has a BBQ tonight (and when she was looking at the clock she thought it said 4.55 and said she had about fifteen minutes then she had to go home and get a shower and I said to her "Hun it is 5.55" OMG I have never seen someone jump so fast it was like watching the road runner he he he... she is too funny. The BBQ she was going to was her sister's wedding BBQ get together to sort things out for the wedding and she was late late late.

My thighs are in sooo much pain from the running yesterday but Debbie and I think we will go into the gym tomorrow morning and do it together.. she said she was a little nervous but hey we will be running (well jogging). I think I will start off with 10 minutes (1 minute jogging and 1 minute walking) and then take it in a week to 2 minutes of each and then change again or I will get bored I just know it.

Roll on for the weigh in on Tuesday. I have stuck to my food... I have been doing more exercise and stepping it up and it should show something if not I WILL SCREAM!!!!

Anyway I am exhausted.

Love ya all
Chubbymum

I ran today on the treadmill!!! OMG OMG

Went to my personal training with Crusher today....

I went on the bike for 10 minutes waiting for Crusher and she was five minutes late so I went to the front counter wondering where she was and she said "how did you get past me?" OMG I said I have been here for 10 minutes he he he.

We then went down to the treadmill and I was talking to one of the ladies on the treadmill beside me called Jackie and I said to her "well done for the running" as I know she had a knee problem and she never usually runs she usually stays on the spin bikes. She said that she has lost so much since she has been running on the treadmill. I said "OMG I couldn't do it is scares me" and then that is when Crusher said come on and she made me run on the treadmill... I was frightened to start it is a scary scary thing for me... BUT I DID IT!!! OMG I just can't get over it.

I feel sooo sore this afternoon after that. I was on the treadmill for 12 minutes and for 6 of those minutes I was running wohoooooo.

We went on the rower for 2000 metres too and then on the bike for 12 minutes. I doesn't sound like I did a lot but OMG OMG I feel pumped... I haven't felt like this in ages.

Roll on 9.6 kilos... woohoooo

I am going to do this! With Crusher's help and her 6 week challenge I know I will be doing this. I must admit it hasn't been a full week yet but I am a little sick of the lunches but I am going to stick with this.

Debbie and I have two walks planned in the weekend.. I it is going to be so much fun. I am doing this guys!! I am pumped... and I know I keep telling you that but it is amazing to have this feeling but I feel like I have just started again and feeling like the world is my oyster.

I might update later with the rest of my day.

I hope you are all ok... ??

Love Chubbymum

Gets better and better

My week just keeps getting better...

Went to my weigh in tonight and I lost 400 grams..

OK it isn't wonderful but it is a loss and I would rather that than the plateau I have been experiencing.

I have not gained in 4 weeks so I am sooo happy about that. I am also more positive about getting the next 10 kilos off than I have in such a long time... I have surrounded myself with positive friends and in particular I think Debbie is doing a lot to keep me motivated and she listens and there is so much we have in common it is great. Among others as well... like Crusher and my Wonderful Weight Watcher ladies and of course all you guys that are commenting and keeping me going.

BTW welcome Steph and thanks for commenting you honestly don't realise how much it keeps me going and I know that commenting after reading for a while and not commenting it is a huge thing... woohooo you did it my friend.

Debbie and I have a goal to loose 10 kilos by end of February together. So that is around 500 grams a week. Which will take me to 114 OMG the teens will be fantastic and then after the 10 kilos I will have only 4 kilos to match my hubby's weight woohoooo.

Debbie wants to lose more than that and I hope for her that she does manage it.

OMG I could be under 100 by April if I lose 1 kilo a week but I know realistically I can't loose 1 kilo a week for that long... ho hum so October next year is my goal to be 99 kilos or less.

It feels achievable today that I can lose 10 kilos by February... my focus is now back on me and not other peoples problems and I think it is fantastic.

I was chatting to one of my WW leaders and we had a good chat about people that are just not right in our lives and she managed to get rid of a person that was holding her back. Debbie was there and said the same thing about a person in her life that she is now realising wasn't a friend at all and was glad that they have parted ways quite a while ago. I said to her that I just hate losing friends but she managed to say that she wasn't a friend... and (she said to me don't take this the wrong way) that some people like bigger people around to make them feel even better about themselves. I said to her "do you think she really did that to me" she said that she really felt like that at the time of meeting her. If I look back on the 3 times that she brushed me off for a better option that she wasn't my friend and the world revolved around her.

It makes me wonder... am I that much of an ugly person that people want to keep me around to make them look good. Am I that big that people only want that part of the friendship? OMG what a lot of growing this week... realising things and people in my life seeing things but didn't say what they thought when she was still my friend.

I know I keep going on about this but it is just one of the things that I have to work through to be able to get this weight loss off and to shake off the acidic influences in my life.

My skin is clearing up and I am sleeping better and not fearing if the phone will ring once again for the 6th time in a day and having to answer because she knew what my schedule was and helping her out with her car problems and her being upset because her mum was treating her once again like crap and bringing her down and the amount of times she rung at 7.30am to tell me how crappy her husband was.... when I found he was a great husband that supported her through everything that she wanted to try.

Also the fact that my whole family knew when the phone rang and it was her again... I started hating the phone and never wanting to pick it up, my hubby went and brought a caller id phone so that we could avoid the phone calls and only pick up the phone once a day.

I am on the second day of Crusher's 6 week challenge and I must admit I have come across a snag in it because I can't eat breakfast till 9.30 since I have to have muesli for breakfast with work as I start work at 7.30.... so that was frustrating this morning as I was soo hungry so I think Crusher and I have made a compromise to have a shake on the work days (well at least the Tuesday as I go from LEAN straight to work).

Crusher I will do this... I know the V is going to be the hardest thing for me but you must realise I used to have a V a day and now I am only having one on a Monday and one on a Saturday and then I will cut down again to make sure I get rid of it totally... it will happen (Thank you Crusher for your concern) and I am trying.

I also have been thinking about the last two months and going back to my WW meetings help me keep on track too and I miss them like crazy when I don't go.... and having their encouraging words keep me going. I also have to know my weight each week or I can't judge and the weight doesn't move and I do think deep down Crusher is now realising that because I am on a losing streak he he he. I know weight shouldn't be the focus but with the amount of weight I have to loose it has to be my focus.

My friend Aroha came and had lunch with me today... well I had a coffee and she had lunch and then went back to work and ate at my desk. It was great to see her again... she keeps hinting that I should move down to Wellington he he he.

Lean was good this morning but the knee is still bugging me... because I feel like I am being left behind and it is bugging me like you wouldn't believe and even more when we are outside and everyone is running.... I hate it!! I hate it!!! I want to run but walking is bad enough on this F*(king knee... I now know what Delwyn was feeling when she had to give up Lean because of her calf muscle.. I don't like the fact that I am hating going.. and I think it is because with the outside stuff I am always feeling like I will never catch up and never do as well as the others... it is bugging me... I suppose that is life, but up until 3 weeks ago I thought I was doing better in my exercise and will be jogging more but alas it isn't to happen just yet.

I got a lovely comment from a parent today sayng that I look like I am glowing in the last week. I think I am... I think I am doing this and I am going to get under 100 kilos!! The last week of posts were a little depressing but I had to go through it to start to be happy in my life again.

OMG I feel sooo loved... I have 31 people emailing me to read my diary so I must be helping someone (other than me) along this journey and that is soooooo a reason to keep going because without your posts I don't think I would have stuck to this journey... you are all my inspiration.

Love ya
Chubbymum

Blob out day

It is a blob out day today.

Spent the day just being at home...

I must admit I am a little bored with it now as I am now used to doing something everyday exercise wise.

My mum has been in one of her little moods today deciding to punish me with something by doing the silent treatment and staying in her bedroom. I think I have come to the conclusion that it is her problem as she has been doing this all my life... making me feel quilty for something but never telling me what it is and I think that is why we usually go out because it is unbearable sometimes.

I went in her room and said to her that our whole holiday she was saying she missed us etc but when we are at home she doesn't treat us like that and moans about everything all day... the room is messy, the kids playroom is untidy (while they are in there playing), the lawns aren't mowed yet (and it is still on Saturday morning) it is honestly driving me insane in the last couple of weeks. I am 36 years old, this is my family and we have a mortgage and we are married and she still treats me like a 12 year old and does these little tantrums.

I love my mum... she does help us out a lot and she is a lovely lady but I am finally at 36 realising that the little tantrums are her problem and if she is going to stay in her room and sulk and not tell us what the problem is then she will stay there all day and that just makes it more of a problem for her as it doesn't bother me like it used to... it does a little but I am not going to let her do it to me... the mind games just brass me off now.

We made fridge magnets with the boys today with plasterer paris (spelling he he he??) and then painted them... they look so cute. We played playstation and we also spent an hour reading our books. We are trying to teach the boys that they need to sit and read now and then and not just play on computers and watch tv's.

I read some more blogs today as I want to get more inspiration to keep me going on this weight loss journey, and one lady I did read was dietgirl. To be quite honest I have come across her blog so many times by others that read it. I was intimidated because she had stuck to it for so long, and is in a place where I want to be and felt a twang of jealousy... but I take my hat off to her as she is an interesting lady and I think I will keep reading.

Been a little hard to keep on track with Crusher's new progam today because of staying home all day I am nibblish... but I stuck to it... didn't want to mind you... It is hard for me the week after my monthly I find that I want to eat sweet things on that week and it drives me insane. Hmmm but I will battle that.

Good night everyone.
I am tired
Love Chubbymum

Round the bridges

Ok... HO HUM (for you Helena) I have a cold... but I have been watching Down size me on Tuesday nights and the trainer (don't know if I like this woman by the way) said that when you are sick you should still get up and do exercise... so I did!! I went for a practice run of the round the bridges.

Hubby got on the computer and found the map of where the 6.3 km's go and we walked it... went with the kids (which btw we should have left home this time) and did it in 1 hour and 30 minutes and I am sure I probably could have taken 10 to 15 minutes off that if we didn't have them. But there were enough hills in the walk and especially nasty at the end of the 6.3 kms is a nasty one arghhhh but I am glad I did it.

I am not too sure my throat was feeling the same way (as I still have a head cold) but I practiced it and the "Round the bridges" is on the 5th November so that isn't too long away.

Then a week later I have my triathlon with the gym... not sure if you would call it a triathlon but Quintathlon as we have to do:

1. 12km Walk/Jog
2. 12km Bike Ride
3. 4000 metre Rower
4. 50 Sit ups
5. 50 Push ups

Crusher seems to think that I can do the 12km's on the 'Round the bridges' but I don't know if I want to do the 12km.

I am doing the 12km's the week after and I have achieved so much this year with my first triathlon, boot camp, tough guy/gal and now the round the bridges and then the second triathlon.

I am not wanting to do these because I love them but just because I want to be in them to say I have achieved it, so the difference between doing the 'Round the bridges' 6.3 km doesn't mean that they mean any less.

I am going to do the 6.3 km's and realised that today that is what I want to do and then the 12km the weekend after. I know... I know Crusher won't be happy as she thinks I can do it and maybe I can but I don't want to do it I think that is the difference this time.

I am also a little worried I am overdoing it for my knee too as I now have both my knees giving me grief and I hate the fact that I feel like I am coming apart.... a little scared that if I keep overdoing it then I am going to get to the stage that I can't do anything at all.

Tomorrow I start my challenge with Crusher and I am a little aprehensive only because I have a choice of 5 meals for 6 weeks and I know what I am like when I can't have something I get bored and I stray... I am going to try try try not to but I think the thing that will let me down is the only choice for breakfast is muesli, yoghurt and fruit and I must admit the yoghurt and fruit for breakfast gives me chills as I hate them mixed.. I know I am a weird chicky but I just don't like it.... but I have to learn to like it because I WANT to get this next 10 kilos OFF

We went and did the groceries this afternoon too...so I spent the whole day walking (I should have worn my pedometer) and finally got to rest at 4.40pm arghhhh.

We got a Dvd out called Zathura and we all quite enjoyed the movie.

Tomorrow if it is a bad day then we are going to sit and make Christmas cards with the kids as we brought them some card and some xmas decorations for their cards and they are itching to make theirs. I reckon it will be fun but messy he he he.

I am going for another walk tomorrow but I think I might leave the hubby and kids home so that I can actually go at a good speed. I haven't practiced enough before this triathlon and it is worrying me a little.

Anyway love ya all

Chubbymum

Motivation Galore

I am back to my old self!!!

Crusher worked me hard today and made me do the rower 4000 metres which took me 25 minutes but I know I can go faster than that as at the start it took us a while to work out where I was going to put my feet as I have a problem on it that my knees go out when I am on the rower so I put my feet on the floor but now I am putting them right under the feet holders so that I still work out properly but not tied in up above like other people so that I can not damage the knee.

I think I am more motivated now than ever... the reason being... I finally realised that I don't have to have Kris in my life to feel fufilled.... and also realising that I have so many supportive people in my life...

• firstly my husband he is just the best,
• Crusher is there for me and listens and is helping me out and believing in me when I don't believe in myself,
• you guys reading and commenting and listening I thrive on your support and the fact that you care and listen to me means SOOOOO much you wouldn't know,
• my friend Delwyn for telling me that I should not have gone back to Kris as a friend (the last time she let me down) and I didn't listen giving Kris the benefit of doubt and so now she can say "I told you so"
• Debbie for listening through the last week and commenting and helping me get through all this crap because I don't like the situation I have been in in the last week, Debbie goes to Lean with me and pushes me and goes to the gym with me and keeps me focussed on the positive side of weight loss, plus she is a great friend at work.

THANKS HEAPS EVERYONE

I felt great because I felt sooo relaxed and the concentration was even better with Crusher today.

Crusher just made me feel great in the fact that she has set me a challenge... I have a 6 week challenge and I will get the food list tonight (that she has two other people doing) and we are going to knock this weight off me he he he...

I said to her I want to lose another 10 kilos by February... now realistically I don't know if I can lose that much but I am going to try. I am more positive with this now and I know I just have to stop PISSING AROUND and do it.

So to be at 114 kilos by end of February will be my next challenge.
The teen's the teens woohooo.

So Crusher "Onward and Downward we go" I have the exercise sorted I reckon... I don't have a problem with the exercise and I am addicted to the gym it is just the food that I have to sort and that DAMN water.

Plus I feel like I am getting another cold... I am taking panadol and barocca like you wouldn't believe at the moment as I don't want to be sick anymore and I don't want my knee to stop me from getting on with this challenge.

So the challenge starts this
Sunday 22 October 2006
with Crusher and it will finish
3rd December 2006

Worked out my measurements today and these are the results

Centimetres lost since January 2005
Arm - 12.5
Waist - 34.2
Hips - 22.0
Thighs - 9.5
Chest - 16.0
Calves - 6.2

Altogther lost: 100.4 centimetres over my whole body.

Went to school to watch my boys do their cross country today and had a picnic lunch with them... it was a lovely afternoon (especially when it was raining most of the day) the rain stopped and the sun came out BLISS!

I was soooo proud of the boys they did so well! They weren't last (like I was in school) and they both tried sooo hard and came in the middle... they were soooo cute with the determination on their faces.

Ok I have yapped on enough... got a sore throat and so I am going to get an early night and make sure this cold that is trying to come on doesn't get any yukkier he he he

Love ya all
Chubbymum

Hospital

Ok so the weekend was fantastic...

Can't say the last 2 days has been after that.

My mum was admitted to hosptial Monday.

Before I went away on the Friday I begged my mum to go to the doctors for her thumb that was sore.. she is afraid of doctors AFRAID AFRAID of doctors and so to get her in to check out her thumb is a nightmare. She said no she wasn't going to go as it was getting better. No it wasn't getting better it was getting worse. When I rang home in the weekend I asked her if she was ok and she kept saying yes her and the boys are good. Got home on Sunday night and her thumb was twice (maybe three) times the size. She kept saying it was better than it was.

By Monday I was worried and said to her that she has an appointment at the doctors at 5.00... so we got her there and the doctor said "you have to go to the hospital" Well..... my mother freaked out and got all upset and I didn't know what to do.... (the reason my mum doesn't like doctors is that my dad went to hospital with bronchitis and died of pneumonia so I can understand hospitals aren't her best friend). Got up to the hospital at 5.30 and we didn't get seen by a doctor till 7.30pm and then she had to go into the surgery to get the top of her thumb lanced (they said she was lucky she came in because if not she could have lost her thumb) The put 3 local needles in her thumb OMG I felt the pain myself as she was holding my hand with her other hand while they did it.

Because of the infection she had to be admitted in to hospital so she was there last night and all day today and they want her over night again. It looks a lot better but I am not convinced the doctors think that tomorrow would be the day she comes home.

I haven't had much sleep worrying about her up there as she doesn't like being in unfamiliar places. I know she is in the best place but I hate leaving her like that.

Anyway I am tired and so I am going to do some of my work (that hubby picked up for me) so that tomorrow isn't a total nightmare at work.

Good night everyone
Love CM

Birthday Quad Bikes in Taupo

Wow What A Weekend it turned out to be!

Friday

Left home at 4.15 and got to Taupo at 6pm.. We went to the motel and it was lovely!!! Then hubby took me to a lovely Italian restaurant where there was a roaring fire and Italian music and the atmosphere was fantastic. I felt soooo relaxed and we had a great time that is for sure.

Kris and Tony met us at the restaurant and then we went to the wholesalers and got some alcohol and went back to the Motel to talk and have a couple of drinks.. it was sooo funny and we had a great time. It was relaxing to be able to talk with friends without telling kids to go to bed or stop shouting or don't do this and that. I really enjoyed the night. Thought I would put these too photos of what we looked like after our drinking he he he. Kris fell off the bed... she doesn't hold her drinks that well he he he he but we had a great time.

Didn't have a wonderful sleep at all because the bed was too soft but I was looking forward to sleeping in but my body just wouldn't let me do that.. it is accustomed to waking up early now with kids ho hum.

So it was soooo good to have my birthday... hubby ordered breakfast and I had breakfast in bed hmmmmmmm... After relaxing and had a lovely shower and sat in bed reading for a bit Kris and her hubby came down and into town we went. We did lots of shopping and hubby said I could buy a couple of things so I brought myself some cd's and I brought 3 new tops. It felt absolutly wonderful to get into some tops and not fear if I will or not... he he he poor Kris must of gotten sick of me saying Kris come and look at this top he he he.

We went to lunch at Breakers but I just couldn't eat it all. Had a chicken roll with salad but with hot chips and I had a couple then left the rest as it wasn't worth me feeling bloated all day for it.

Kris and Tony brought me the book I have been wanting for so long called Why French Women don't get fat... sooo cool.. just started reading it but I am enjoying it that is for sure.

Went back to the Motel to meet Delwyn and Heather and got spoilt once again. I didn't expect to get any presents because they were all coming down to go Quad biking with me. Delwyn brought me a white pasta bowl and plates that match my dinner set and they were beautiful. Heather brought me a book called "Eight Steps to Getting the most out of life Now (no opportunity wasted) by Phil Keoghan" and I can't wait to read that as well.

Crusher and her hubby Tony met us around 2pm and we all went together to the Quad bikes OMG OMG OMG OMG it was sooooo exciting apart from when we were getting talked to by the guide he kept on saying the practice track (which was looking rather scary behind us, but found out later it wasn't the practice track he was talking about)... it was the weirdest feeling getting on these bikes.. my heart raced and I felt like I wasn't in control when we were going down the practice track but I was happy because I was conquering my fears I was living a little on the edge and combating my fear of heights and situations where I have no control.

The tracks were muddy and most of them weren't any wider than the bike and there was water everywhere as it was pouring down with rain. I got stuck twice. Once was going up a hill and I didn't go fast enough so the guide had to get out and push me out of the mud he he he and then the next time I had to go around a corner and one wheel tipped and the bike stopped sideways OMG it was tooooo funny I was shitting myself he he he. We went on top of this huge mountain and it was really foggy but it was sooo high up my ears were popping. I didn't worry too much even though I have a HUGE fear of heights... I want to stop feeling scared like that.

We stopped at the top to have milo, coffee and biscuits and relax a little before going down again. Going down was scary as I kept slipping going down as the muddy was so squishy but it was exciting.

Got down to the bottom and found hubby stranded as his bike didn't want to start up so he jumped on the back and we rode about 10 minutes out of the bush... it was scary having someone on the back when you are going up a hill. I had to tell hubby to sit forward as it felt like the bike was going to go back... it was fantastic. During one part I went fast through some puddles and we bounced like trampolines he he he

Got back and I was pumping.... pumping... pumping.... it was the best birthday ever!!

Got back got showered and we all went out for dinner to a Korean/Japanese restaurant the food was amazing and realy fresh. It was a really great dinner we all laughed and ate and laughed and ate some more he he he.

After dinner we went to bed as we were all really tired and needed some sleep. Woke up this morning and had a spa bath and hubby painted my toe nails he he he.

Took a slow drive back today... we stopped at the Bee Hive shop and got some little treats for the kids and Delwyn, me and hubby wrote a postcard for each of the kids and stopped at Tirau to shop he he he and brought myself a new bag. OMG I am never usually allowed to buy this much ever as we really can't afford it but hey that is what a Visa is for he he he and had a lovely cuppa in a cafe and sat relaxed reading magazines. It was great to go have a coffee with a friend (hubby and Delwyn) and just be and read it was quite refreshing to just be and not talk talk talk. I think we were all just buggered.

Got home to a wonderful roast and Crusher came over to give me my food regime for the next week or so... it was simple and easy and not a day to day thing that was in too much detail which was fantastic.. I have three weeks to sort out my situation and get myself to this 30 kilos.

I had a fantastic weekend and don't wanna go to work tomorrow...

If I think of any more to tell I will update later.

Love ya all
Chubbymum