Nothing much happened

I think the only exciting thing that happened today was LEAN with Crusher... it was a more interesting morning than it has been lately and everyone was saying that felt heavier and it was harder today... we did kickboxing and walking and stairs etc... I did find it rather hard going up the stairs but then the rotation was changed and going down the stairs was better.

Was talking to hubby and my other knee (the used to be good knee) is hurting under the knee and in a different place from my other knee... hubby seems to think it is my cartilidge in this knee that is the problem grrrr. Was chatting with Debbie on the drive home and we both agreed the reason we both liked today's LEAN was because we didn't feel like we were separated from the group.... and until Debbie started that is what I was feeling because I am slower than the other fit people... they run and I don't and even if I did I would never be able to keep up with them. Today felt like we were actually part of the group and not the two at the back or the two holding everyone up while they had to hold a prone hold or something.... that is the worst thing for people that are slower is that we are hindering other people.

I said to Debbie that before she came I felt like that every single time because I wasn't up to the others speed and it got to the stage that I hated it because I would never catch up! It was great to have someone that understood.

With the concentration on strenghtening my thigh muscle my knee was a little bit better this morning but still nigley... I was a little upset by the end because I really felt like running today but I knew that if I did then I would be weeks before my bloody knee was right For FUCK sake I am finally getting in to my exercise and I have Debbie to push me and I have the other bleep bleep knee go out on me... it is just not fair.. does anyone have any ideas on how to help my knee????

The funny thing is is that the cross trainer is sort of ok on my knee... it doesn't start to agrevate me until around the 8 to 10 minute mark but then it isn't as bad. Going up a step is the hardest thing... you would think that going on a cross trainer would do the same thing... Hubby seems to think it is different because I am pulling up my whole weight to get up a step whereas on a cross trainer I am just going round and round hmmmmm not sure really.

Even though this week has been an emotional nightmare with Kris and all.... I haven't felt this good in a while... I am feeling like I am finally focussing on the exercise and weight loss in a good way and changing things for me and not fretting about what is happening in others lives and trying to sort out every single problem that is going on with them... I am focussing on me and my family and not crap...

I know it took me a while but after to talking to Debbie yesterday and breaking down about the whole thing... she finally made me realise that I need to do all this for me and that I am the most important person and so I have to get on with it. Woohooo go you Debbie!!

So I am on top of it... I have crossed out my exercise for this week (on the sidebar) and so I have gotten myself back on track with the exercise... so I am going to do another challenge for next week...hmmmm I think it will be the water intake every day... or I might just start that tonight hmmmm.

Spent the afternoon in Quinn's classroom helping out with craft afternoon. The teacher brought some fabric felts and they coloured them in. Also they took their bean seeds and put them in containers and I walked around the field with them to practice for their cross country tomorrow... so glad that they don't run fast he he he he so my walking was fast enough.

I am signing off now... I am keeping my promise to myself to update everynight... woohooo

Love CM