Time to "MAKE MYSELF MY HOBBY" - From 2005 to 2008 I lost 42 kgs and things went wrong in my life with my mum and work and went in to major depression. I am trying my hardest to get back in to it and doing it for me. Going to "Make Myself My Hobby".
Tuesday, 25 April 2006
Saturday, 15 April 2006
Friday & Saturday
We decided (hubby and I) to have some free time without the kids so my mum looked after them and we went for a bike ride.... so the decision was to bike around the 10km track for my L.E.A.N Event training. OMG when we went down to the river and back up again there was a hill. Now my trainer said it is a slight hil OMG OMG OMG that isn't a slight hill it is like going up stairs without the stairs there and it is straight up.... now when I say straight up I mean my toes were almost touching my shins that sort of straight up... I got up the top huffing and puffing and then burst out laughing... it was bad enough walking up it but I had to also take the bike as well... he he he he.
The rest of the bike ride was ok and the walk would be ok... just bloody long and I hope I make it. I brought 4 bottles of Mizone today (as they were on special) for the walk and hubby said that he would meet me around the walk with them and with some bananas so that I make it. I think the light headedness while walking is from not drinking enough water or an inner ear infection because it is only when I am walking that this happens.
So anyway we managed to bike the whole 10km and came home to have lunch and I just felt really proud of the fact that I had biked around the track especially when it was really hot hot there. What fabulous weather I must say.
After lunch we we out to the lake to walk around it. 4 km in 45 minutes as we took it slowly and there was SOOOOOO many people out there being Good Friday etc. I think maybe I overdid the day as it was a warm day but I felt good afterwards.
Went to bed early last night while hubby was in the spa bath because I was bored... I didn't feel like making cards and I didn't feel like watching tv... so tried to have a good sleep.
Saturday
Had a relaxing morning making eggs for Easter with the boys. They blew out the eggs (so we could have them for breakfast) and then they dyed the eggs blue, yellow and green.... they had so much fun doing this. Thought we would make them up for Easter day.. not too sure what they will do with them but hey they looked pretty... and the boys enjoyed doing it. I think they might be painting them as well and making them into some sort of animal or something hmmm...
Went to the new New World to get all the food for our camping trip as this time I am not going to buy food over in Waihi as it is soooo expensive and we would only get stuff we had forgotten. After that took my mother to Westfield to go shopping and I left her there and came home for lunch with the boys and me and the boys went for a 40 minute walk after lunch and then went to pick up mum.
We are going to my friends place in Waitoa tonight... they live in the country there and so we are going for dinner there and catch up... probably play some cards too.
Lisa said that she has got a part time job in town here with Telecom so that would be great as we can get together after both of our jobs and go for lunch and drinkies.
I have been friends with Lisa like OMG since I was 7.... so if you want to know how old I am that is 28 years I have known her... she like knows everyone I have ever been out with and knows what I was like at school and we travelled all around the South Island with our music group and we have so much in common and now we have two boys as well. So it will be good to spend some more time with her.
I find that since I have been losing weight I am trying to spend more time with friends and do more things than sit at home... I am enjoying my friends at work more now too and I have decided this weekend to make sure I schedule them into my busy life more now too.
Only two days woohoo and then we are off camping... I know that with my luck this beautiful weather is not going to last but hey it is going to be fun and we will have at least one day nice aye ???? he he he he
When I was out walking today I asked hubby to see how I walk... because my trainer said something about my walking the other day I thought maybe I should see if anyone else sees it. Well hubby said the same thing as she did that I flick my feet when I go to step down... and so he tried to tell me how I should walk.... OMG I laughed my head off because it felt like I was spastic or something with the way I was walking he he he. So I have to see how I can walk with flicking as my knees aren't that good with all this walking that it is hindering my knees hmmmm what to do? What to do?
I will update later as to what dinner was like at Lisa's.
Love ya all have a good night
Love Chubbymum
Thursday, 13 April 2006
Tap Dancing
They were in the tea room and I said to them "are you guys interested in tap dancing" one of the girls jumps up and said "oh yeahhhh I have so wanted to do tap dancing". Her name is Fiona and she has done a lot of drama and dancing and she likes photography like me... when she goes on her photographic competitions down to Gisborne she texts me to ask me what photo I would take with the clues they give them... sooo much fun and I want to do it with her next year.
And one of the other ladies said she would do it as well. Fiona said "well now you have no excuse to go out with us....he he he" I said it wasn't that I didn't want to... so now I have 3 people to go with... OMG this is going to be so much fun. I am really sick of the gym and everything else at the moment it will be good to get out and do exercise and get away from all the negative feelings I am having there at the moment.... just because after a year I am a little bored that is all.
I am at work typing this today.. yep it is my day off but my boss asked if I would work 2 hours for her so she could get off for her Easter holiday as it is a long drive and sucker me said yeah that would be ok. I am wishing I said no because I had the morning shopping he he he had fun doing that and brought some things and then coming down from that to come here at work ho hum.
Everyone is so happy because it is Easter.. I can't say that I am happy... I get a pit in my stomach when long weekends come along as I hate the way people drive and how they don't drive safely and people die... I don't want it to be me.
We are going away on Tuesday (after the holiday weekend) camping and we are all looking forward to it. I have brought the kids some creative things to make just in case it is bad weather and some new books for them to read as well so that will be cool. I would like to just have the best holiday and relax and get back with being with the family as the last couple of weeks have melted into work and work and work and exercise and I want it to be more than that.
Anyway... talking to hubby tonight and I am going to do this weight loss. Yes I am going slowly! Yes I have sort of lost the mojo with the food and losing weight but hey it is coming off!! I have had 3 weeks of no gaining! NO GAINING!!! and I want it to keep going.
Have a Happy Easter everyone if you don't read me for the next couple of day. I leave on Tuesday for the camping trip woohooo.
Love Chubbymum
Tuesday, 11 April 2006
Weight Watcher Meeting
Went to work and it was full on with work and I had a headache by the end of the day that is for sure.
I haven't been feeling dizzy today because I think it was a sinus problem. I told a couple of friends in the last day and they have had the same thing so I think that is what the problem was... wohooooo.
So anyway I went to weigh in tonight and it was a great one. We laughed like anything and I met some more people that I haven't talked to before and I had the guts at the end to ask the whole meeting if there was anyone that wanted to do tap dancing with me and a couple were interested so I can't wait till we do it. We said that in June we will go to a class and get some shaking going on he he he.... woohoo meeting some more friends and (as my husband says) expanding my circle of friends it feels fantastic.
So I won't be going back to Weight Watchers for 3 weeks because of Easter (when I am going away camping) and then Anzac Day and then the next week I will be back... welllll when I was leaving my Weight Watcher Leaders said "see ya in 3 weeks when we have a suprise for you!" I said you mean for all of us and Kylie said "No we have a suprise just for you!" and then said "Good things come to people that wait" so it has got me intrigued that is for sure on what the suprise is but they seemed pretty chuffed with themselves.
So anyway I lost... didn't think I would but hey one night bad didn't mean I had made my whole week a disaster aye... It was a suprise that is for sure.
Anyway that is enough for me tonight... I am tired and going to beddy byes he he he
Love
Chubbymum
Sunday, 9 April 2006
Not sure how I feel
I think I have been on the computer too much with work and home and everytime I am on it afterwards I feel quite dizzy.... I think it might be time that I get my eyes checked again..
I am scared though... 6 months after me and hubby got married I had a scare.... I went to the doctors about the fact that I was having headaches and went to the A & E and they sent me up to hospital with a condition called Papaladema(spelling??) which basically meant there was pressure behind my eyes and they thought it was a tumor.
I went through a cat scan, lumber puncture and all the time thinking that I was going to die....it was the scariest time of my life... it was the same time that my Dad was going through a cancer scare so I didn't tell them for 2 days because I didn't want them to worry.
So the scan came back normal and so did the lumber puncture... I had to wait for 3 months to get an appointment with a specialist and all to tell me that he could have stopped my worry at the time as he was on call and he could have sorted it out. I have a condition called Drusin which means I always have a headache behind my eyes, and I have funny shaped eyes. He said that his wife had the same problem. The funny thing he did was made me stand up and touch my toes. He said for a big person I am VERY flexible and not all big people have that.. he he he
So.... everytime I go to the optomistrist I go through the fear of them finding something else. So I haven't had my eyes checked for 4 years now because it is really traumatic for me so..... I have to go and get them checked again I KNOW I KNOW but it will be after Easter that is for sure.
Hubby and the family all have sinus problems today so I think that is also the reason for my dizzyness this week as it feels like my nose is blocked and it is the time of the year to get things like this.
So that is why I haven't posted in a couple of days... been fretting and also not knowing what to do! I have had plenty of advice but also fretting more because of my past and not because I truly think there is a problem ya know. Or it might be that my blood pressure is up again too... and I don't think that is it... I do think it is the sinus as they are clogged... I put vicks under my nose and my headache goes away for a while....
It might be because I am always indoors and haven't been out in the fresh air for a while.
Update.... went for a bike ride with the family this afternoon and it made me feel a lot better and then I got back on here and felt all weird again... do you think my body is trying to tell me something he he he he he.
Was watching the tap dancing on tv last night on a movie called bootmen and OMG it has convinced me even more that I am going to go and learn tap dancing and not let my inhibitions get the better of me. So tomorrow I am going to phone and find out where I can go and learn this so if anyone in Hamilton is reading this come with me!!! I would love to meet some new friends and have a great time... need to get some exercise that isn't the gym as I am getting bored with it a little... so come on Hamilton new friends....come with me...wohooooo. Plus watching "So you think you can dance" the guy tap dancing was just a joy to watch and look at how many calories he was burning woohoooo.
Not too sure about the food this week but hey I was sure that I was FANTASTIC with my food last week and I stayed the same so what will be will be. I was so naughty on Thursday night because of the soccer meeting and the parent/teacher interview I just didn't have time to cook and I DIDN'T chose wisely we had...... cringe...... pizza. But in my defence we haven't had PIZZA in like Forever and so the points will be high and maybe a gain but hey!! I am good and I gain or stay the same so why not have a little treat now and then. I don't have it every week or even every month so I shouldn't be feeling bad about it.... but I am ho hum.
I will leave ya with a quote: “So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then when we summon the will, they become inevitable"
Thursday, 6 April 2006
Great couple of nights
It was a really busy day at work yesterday.
Was thinking about getting up early and going to the gym this morning but then thought NO I haven't been feeling well lately I need to rest so I am fit for Thursday's L.E.A.N. Work was so full on and I got to meet all the Managers of the other 3 creches which was great as I have only talked to them on the phone and they seemed really nice over the phone and meeting them wasn't anything different. Got tired of looking at the computer yesterday and working out accounts that had been stuffed up by the person that did it before me...some angry parents... not at me but at the new company... but hey as Nikki (my ex boss) said.... I will sort it out that is for sure woohoooo.
Kris came and had lunch with me at work and it was really nice. It was such a hot day though and I felt really tired and only having a half an hour for lunch it was just toooo fast. But I had fun that is for sure. It also gave Kris a chance to see where I worked.
Got home in the afternoon and realised that I hadn't done my homework for my card class he he so I went into my craft room and made two cards with the stickers she gave us... OMG that was the hardest thing to do... it wasn't that inspiring but I suppose that is why she gave it to us so that we would think out of the square. She has given us Easter stickers to do some cards this week and there will be a prize (an easter egg) which I don't want but it would be good to be think out of the square that is for sure.
I had salmon for dinner last night and it was a beauty and I had been looking forward to it all day.... I put garlic and basic pesto on it and cooked it in the George Forman grill and had veges and hot chips (made the healthy way he he he) and guess what I COULDN'T EAT IT ALL. OMG that has never happened before but with this book that I have been reading and the tape.... it just makes me think differently. So I had a quarter of it... and at the time was quite upset that I didn't manage to eat it but now thinking back it was a fantastic thing... and it wasn't wasted because I am having some of it for lunch today.
I was sooooo full when I had to pick up Kris that it was uncomfortable woohooo for me he he he he... so we went to our favourite little drinking hole before our card class and chatted. I felt quite full and tired so I was a little quiet but I think Kris understood.
The card class was fantastic!!! I managed to make 4 cards and proud of each one of them. I think the ladies in the class are getting more and more relaxed and we are enjoying our time. I felt like I was on a high doing the cards tonight and was managing to do some lovely work he he he (if I must say so myself) I have posted them here if you want to have a look.
Thursday (so far)
Got up at 5.30am and went to my L.E.A.N event class this morning... OMG I worked out so hard today with my buddy Dee. This is what I did:
- 10 mintues on the bike
- 12 reps of weights (5 Kilos)
- and while I was doing that my buddy Dee was doing the Straddle step bar and then we swapped and did 3 sets.
- Bike 5 minutes and on the bike doing 30 secs realllly fas and 10 secs rest
- 3 sets Calf raises
- 3 sets squats with swiss ball
- 500 metres rower then 10 sit ups and 10 push ups
- 500 metres rower then 10 sit ups and 10 push ups
- 500 metres rower then 10 sit ups and 10 push ups
- 1 minute skipping
- 5 minutes walking back and forth on the lines (can't remember what they call it)
- 1 minute Skipping
- Up and down the stairs 10 times
- Then run, walk, run, walk for 3 minutes arghhhh
OMG OMG I am soooo tired after that today. I push myself harder with Dee as she is like the fittest in the group and she always supports me when she has finished doing what she does so it was fantastic to work out with her today.
After that I had a meeting with Sgt Major as Dee had told him last week that I have trouble with my knee and can he help me.. He has some sort of degree in physio stuff (not sure what, just a lot of initials after his name he he he)...so he asked me lots of questions and then played around with my knee (he he he hmmm) and told me that he can feel cartlidge loose (or something to that effect) in my knee and he has given me some exercise to sort it out.. but with all the poking around it is bloody sore now grrrr but at least someone is trying to help me sort this out and also that Dee and Sgt Major want to help is fantastic... and I didn't even ask. So Sgt Major said that I have to do these exercise for the week and he wants to see me next week. Apparently there is a major difference between the muscles in my legs and they need strengthening...
After getting home and having a shower I went and took Corbin to school and watched the snail races they were having in class with real snails... how fascinating that was... I was enjoying it. Then went to Kris's place to visit and then came home to do this... such a good start to the morning but my muscles everywhere are HURTING OUCH.
I will try and update tonight after the parent teacher interview and the soccer manager meeting I have to go to. OMG am I a busy wee lass or what he he
Love Chubbymum
Which leaves me to
Tuesday, 4 April 2006
Sorry for no update yesterday
Well I have been good this week with my eating and all my exercise and I am fretting about the weigh in tonight. I want to lose that is for sure but everytime I think I have done really well I end up gaining. I just don't want to gain... it feels like all the work I have been putting in to it is for nothing. Yeah I know on to a more healthier lifestyle etc but still dissapointing.
So anyway... I have decided to put my weight up again and see how it goes for the next couple of weeks. If I don't like it then I will take it off again he he he. Since Kris is going to my WW meeting now it seems silly to not put it up there.
I was doing it because I was competing with her and getting upset because I can't lose as fast as her. Yes my problem... but with me and weight it is not logical and I am not logical. I do the same as Kris with exercise and I am REALLY good with my food but I lose like 300 grams and she loses 2 to 3 kilos and it was doing my head it (I have talked to her about this as she is my friend). So today I thought what they hey she is going to know what I lose every week because at my meeting sooo many people ask each week how I have done and I don't want to be restricted anymore. It was helping for the last 3 months to not tell her (in my mind) but now I have to just be!!!
So I am looking forward to the WW meeting tonight with my friend there... it will be good to have someone I know from my normal day to day life to be there and we can bounce ideas off each other.. it will be fantastic.
On Sunday we were driving home from shopping and Corbin said "can we have popcorn when we get home?" his Dad said "yes we can" Corbin said "Mum you can have popcorn it is fat free" I said thank you son I will have some. Then he proceeded to say "it is so cool that it is fat free and there is only 2 meters of fat in it" Hubby and I burst out laughing because it sounded so cute. He was looking at us as if to say what are you laughing at but I just said "it is nice you are looking after me" sooooo cute.
I am feeling so much fitter now than I have ever been.
Work is going ok... I am a little lonely in my office all alone but the girls leave nice little notes on my pin board and they come in now and then. My old boss phones me from her office asking if I am ok... so that is really nice.
For the past two weeks I have been doing the Paul McKenna "I can make you slim" book and have been totally enjoying it. I was a little skeptical when in the slimming magazine a lady swore that it was the reason she lost weight... but after reading the book and listening to the tape I am a little more positive towards myself each day.
Reading the book it is so simple... I thought he would give all this mumbo jumbo stuff and make it hard to learn to lose weight because you have to remember rule after rule but it is simple... There are only 4 rules and the cd is fantastic. So I am trying the 90 day plan with him and seeing how it goes. But of course I am still doing WW as I think it is a great plan and more people have lost with it than any other diet/healthy lifestyle change he he.
I have been overwelmed by the comments I have had lately and thank you very much for caring enough about me. I suppose it was a little uncharacteristic of me to just sign off like that but so many things happening in my life and trying to keep up with the journal was making me feel like I was out of control. The confusion in my head about how much weight I lose a week was getting to me as well.
I have realised that I am achieving this weight loss because of a whole lot of things and one of them being that I write in here and get so much feedback and encouragment. I honestly didn't think that anyone would be too worried if I didn't write again. Hubby said that if I can motivate just one person to get some weight off then I am achieving something and that when I first started this I was googling galore to find someone in my situation that had to lose this much weight to read their journal so I would get some inspiration... and I still do that.. I still read as many journals as I can so I can keep my motivation up.
I find that the Weight Watcher magazines are ok but there is never enough in them and I would rather that they came out once a month so that I can keep my motivation going... I never understood why it isn't a monthly magazine there must be heaps out there for them to inform us on.
I do read the slimming magazine and love it but would love to have other inspirational magazines to read instead of the Womens weekly CRAP that has who left whom and who is having a baby and what the royals are doing now... it is so not what I want to spend my money on.
So I have 15 minutes and I am due for the dreaded weigh in it is soooo scary...... I have done all my exercise and I have pointed so I am thinking it will be a loss but I have been proven wrong before! Especially after Christmas when I was doing all that exercise and bike riding and I lost 200 grams in 3 weeks 200 grams.... it just doesn't make sense. I can get it when I am bad with the tracking and the exercise and only lose that but when I try and don't lose it is just not right.
Anyway I will be back later with an update.
Love Chubbymum
Sunday, 2 April 2006
You WON I am back!
Had a chat to hubby last night about the messages on the Weight Watchers website about why I had finished up... OMG there are so many things why I had decided to stop posting but I cannot mention in here you can email me if you want to chat..... so anyway thank you to the ladies for their concern and I was overwhelmed last night with tears in my eyes that people actually cared.
So anyway here is Saturday's day
Got up early and had french toast... he he he french toast but I enjoyed it and I pointed it.
Went out shopping for a new bike for Quinn today and we got one... we got a batman bike for him. He looks so cute. So we ended up going for a 3.5 km bike ride and it was a little slow but that was because Quinn was still getting used to the bike.
I managed to get time to make 4 cards today and was quite proud of them. I am so enjoying having the time to make my cards. I am glad that I have shown Kris how to make cards and told her about the card class I was going to as it has been good having someone I know enjoying craft as well.
I absolutly love that the study is now made up to have my desk all sorted with card making stuff... it can be quite addictive that is for sure. I get in there and I just go into my own world. I would really really really love to have a shop of my own and teach people how to make cards and buy what ever I want he he he he.
I am such a stationery aholic that is for sure.. I love buying paper and pens and things to make cards. I wouldn't mind doing a card swap sort of thing with people from different places around the world so that I can learn some techniques from them as well. Or maybe if you have a card that you have made you can send it to me he he he... if you want to then my email is mandienz@yahoo.co.nz he he he it would be so cool.
Every time I am out in a shop I think about how the thing in front of me would look like on a card. I know it won't make me a million dollars but it will make me happy.
So anyway after making my cards hubby and I went for a walk. Asked mum to look after the boys and we left at 4.55 and got home at 6.25 wooohoooo and we went for a 7.6km walk it was like bliss knowing that it was a little easier than last week. I went around the walk with the car with my mum to show her how far we walked and she couldn't believe we had gone so far.
I know I have to make 10km I know it is going to take a lot for me to do that because I am almost dead after a 7.6km. The L.E.A.N event training event is on May 7th and on that day I have to do 10km walk, 4km bike ride and a 2km row on the rowing machine. OMG I know if I push myself I can make the 10km walk but OMG how am I going to achieve the others.... I don't know if I can manage that in 6 weeks. It is scaring the hell out of me that is for sure.
If any of you know Karen please go to her journal and tell her how much we love her and don't want her to stop posting because she inspires me and I don't want to see her stop!!!
Love ya all and thanks for being here my friends... without you I wouldn't be achieving this journey.
Love Chubbymum
P.S if there are any of you out there that don't comment but read please comment and let me know you are out there... it makes my day.